05/14/2016 - Phil hints at countermeasures against "stalkers" -

[Smutley]

 

[Randy Lahey]

If he actually got a gun, he's bound to shoot himself

 

[neverendingmidi]

No way could he get a gun in Cali. I'm betting on one of those black cat things, or pepper spray.

 

[Erubetie]

Spoiler: Leaked image of Phil's gun

 

[The Man With No Name]

The only gun Phil is licensed to carry

 

[Psycho]

Translation: I'm gonna do something really stupid Monday and justify it by saying I'm just trying to protect myself from Kiwis.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

You are shrinking, and your two little balls are shrinking with you. And the fact that you've got "Potato" written down the side of your guns...
And the fact that I've got "Desert Eagle point five O" Written down the side of mine...

 

[Stress Sigh]

I'll be sure to monitor the news Monday for any stories of a bouncing sqeeking man shooting himself in the foot in public.

 

[El Rodrigo]

Wait, stalkers?

That would imply somebody was willing to get within 50 feet of you. I call shenanigans.

 

[knifetruck]

Wow, that would be weirdly threatening if I didn't have the common sense to know, at best, he purchased a water gun. After all, Phil's too scared to hold anything bigger than his dick. Also, this has to be the worst threat ( ? ) ever. Almost like calling the police before you shoot someone.

 

[Football Meatlong]

He's signed up for some of those Lesbian Martial Arts classes Chris was talking about?!

 

[AnOminous]

Someone should report him to the police as a gun-wielding psychotic who has made repeated threats to commit hate crimes.

 

[Stress Sigh]

He's signed up for some of those Lesbian Martial Arts classes Chris was talking about?!

It'll be no use against our elite capoeira trained field agents.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

What if this is all a by some agent of W.E.E.N saying they will sell Phil a gun?

 

[Ravenor]

Well I foresee this ending well.

 

[Rou]

It's gonna be a gaudy knife

 

[Bassomatic]

5150 forbids you from buying a gun Phil.

I honestly look forward to the lie about how you got past that, and why you can't show the weapon.

Or yea as @Rou said a Tyce level knife . I kinda hope brass knuckles because he won't know how to use them and that's a recipe for ruining your hands.

 

[Dr. Tremolo]

The amount of guns he owns is double-inversely proportional to the amount of testicles he has.

 

[Alex Krycek]

Its not a toy, its a Battlefield Replica

 

[Taily Puff]

Phil has not only given up on showering, but has stopped changing his clothes altogether. His stench is now powerful enough to keep any would be attackers at least 8 feet away. He's graduated from potatokin to skunkkin.