[11 May 2019] Phil Plans to Move Out in June - Because what is a home without an abuser?

UselessRubberKeyboard

Mergin' n' spergin'
True & Honest Fan
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It's hard to believe someone could be so utterly fucking stupid as to be homeless for 5 years, luck into a Section 8 flat in a liberal area perfect for them, and wind up being evicted for being an utter tosser to all his neighbors. You'd think after 5 years of not having a home of your own, he'd do anything to keep the one he was given (and didn't have to work for, like most other people). But here we are.

Phil is literally too re.tarded to have his own place.
 

repentance

True & Honest Fan
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I would wager he'd move to Austin or Asheville as both cities are major leftist centers and hipster meccas but considering they are both located in otherwise traditionally conservative Southern states (Texas and North Carolina respectively) and Phil is an idiot who loves his strawmen and stereotypes, I doubt he would even entertain the notion of going anywhere close to south of the Mason-Dixon line.
Tommy Tooter is always looking for room-mates to fleece.
 

Tragi-Chan

Godmaster Reverend
True & Honest Fan
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It's hard to believe someone could be so utterly fucking stupid as to be homeless for 5 years, luck into a Section 8 flat in a liberal area perfect for them, and wind up being evicted for being an utter tosser to all his neighbors. You'd think after 5 years of not having a home of your own, he'd do anything to keep the one he was given (and didn't have to work for, like most other people). But here we are.

Phil is literally too re.tarded to have his own place.
I think it’s because he’s never really had to work to survive. He’s always been able to find someone to take pity on him or some program to help him before he suffered any real hardship. He probably thinks the same thing will happen again. Maybe it will, but I doubt it.
 

Graffiti canvas

True & Honest Fan
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It's hard to believe someone could be so utterly fucking stupid as to be homeless for 5 years, luck into a Section 8 flat in a liberal area perfect for them, and wind up being evicted for being an utter tosser to all his neighbors. You'd think after 5 years of not having a home of your own, he'd do anything to keep the one he was given (and didn't have to work for, like most other people). But here we are.

Phil is literally too re.tarded to have his own place.
This really is the crux of why Phil is such a shit heel.

While it's not unique that there are mentally exhausting people who are constantly in self made crisis, there's an even scummier tier of those people who not only manufacture their own crisis, but then absolutely shit all over anyone and anything that tries to help them.

Never once has Phil expressed any sentiment that he was grateful for his situation or show any motivation to prevent such a "traumatic" homelessness experience from happening again. He only expressed contempt that it wasn't enough and smugly demanded more while bragging about renewed wasteful behavior.

He throws around mental illness like a matador's cape whenever the bull of reality charges him, unaware of the fact that if you're with it enough to leverage a mental disease like that so frequently as an excuse, you're also with it enough to realize you need help. He's been in the perfect position to get said help for the last 3 years. Instead he LARP'ed being an anarchist and spent $1000's on mall ninja gear.

Fuck you, Phil. You're the worst kind of societal drain. Good luck this winter.
 

I raped a dog 2day

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Phil hasn't completed his Antifa LARP story yet though. I don't think even HE could find a way to make it sound like he's fighting the fash while at the same time, living in a dirt hole in the middle of the desert.
I could see it happening though. I mean, it’s not like he’s actually fighting fascists or having home invasions. All he does is talk about being tough, show off garbage mall ninja gear, and tell people he’s under attack. He can do that whether he’s living in La Zorra, his apartment, in a dumpster or under a bridge. His imaginary stories don’t need a specific setting
 

Tragi-Chan

Godmaster Reverend
True & Honest Fan
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Man I wish he'd go down to La Zorra, that be an excellent development to this new season
He did seem enthusiastic about the idea before, but only on the condition that other people pay for everything. That was back when Greta was selling it as a place where troons could play with guns to dull the regret from cutting their dicks off. Greta would only let him in if they were absolutely desperate for grunt labour, and Phil would never go for that.
 

The Dude

My dad says that's for pussies.
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I think the way Phil has behaved during his time in the apartment, the total lack of appreciation and gratitude for having a home of his own, and the revelation of his pending eviction that was recently brought to light should remove any doubts anyone may have held about Phil never having actually been homeless. I mean, we all knew his "5+ years of houselessness" was all a bullshit act and that Phil was really couch surfing with people who took pity on him and staying in motel rooms, but I'm sure there are still some fools out there who believed Phil was really homeless.

Because anyone who was truly homeless and then had a home of their own finally wouldn't have behaved the way Phil has. They would have done everything within their power to make sure they could keep their home. Phil thinks he's just going to go back to couch surfing and motel rooms, and he may for a while. But Phil has little-to-no good will left to receive. He's well known as a worthless mooch in the circles he tries to glom on to. And he doesn't have thousands of dollars in back TardBux in his account anymore, and what little he brings in every month will not last long. Phil is probably a little worried, but I'm sure he's mostly optimistic that people will take care of him again and he will be fine mooching. He doesn't know just how badly fucked he is, but it'll dawn on him soon enough. When people start rejecting his requests to crash with them, it'll start becoming clearer and clearer that he done fucked himself, and not in the kinky way. He will beg. He will be desperate. He will be alone.
 

Nazbol Furry

Gang Gang
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Looking forward to seeing this potato in one of our local women's shelters, where the other residents will lose their beds if they object to sharing a room with him.

As far as I can tell, all the shelters here sort people purely based on gender self-identification and crack down hard on anyone who has a problem with that.
 

Goddessoftheshire

I'm so very pretty!
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The thing about disability apartments or section 8 apartments is they put up with a lot more out of tenants then say regular housing. They deal with nutters and trashy people all the time so the fact he lasted as long as he did might explain that. The fact he was evicted meant the property manager had more crap on him then even we have documented or even know about. I mean obviously the filth, his harassing an actual mentally ill disabled neighbor, the trashing the apartment, and the drama all were used by the apartment complex to oust him. I bet there was a lot more complaints about Phil, apartment complex housing even higher end ones are drama dens filled with busy buddy neighbors. So there would be people waiting and watching just to complain or gossip to management about the smelly weirdo in antifa bondage gear and his vodka inhaling boyfriend in apt c. Phil being Phil I'm sure he made enemies of everyone in not only his building but the surrounding apartment buildings. So the complex probably has so much documentation to back up their eviction of Phil that there is no way he could of fought the eviction. They would cover themselves legally because they have to do deal with the government to get money for housing people like Phil.
 

Coldgrip

Dragon Kick your ass into the Milky Way.
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Greta would only let him in if they were absolutely desperate for grunt labour, and Phil would never go for that.
The thing is though, Kjel wouldn't tell Phil that he'd be manual labor and Phil would absolutely show up on Kjel's doorstep of Troontown if he could get somebody to drive him out there.

So it would be a double-whammy when not only would Phil be surprised he has to do actual hard work, but Kjel realizes that Phil is even too useless to be a worker drone.
 
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Angry New Ager

CLINTON 2020: "One Nation, Under a Groove..."
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Phil may be inflexible enough to keep going between Portland and the SF Bay area though.
Powerlevel: I pretty much live on I-5 (with occasional forays a little to the east). West Coast, best coast, motherfuckers.

Phil can't go back to California. Too many Latinos, some of whom might take grievous exception to some of the shitty tattoos he's acquired in lily-white Portland. Plus, I think he's burned too many bridges there, but mostly, he's asking for trouble as an obviously white potato covered in dog-Spanglish scratch, and with a motherfucking teardrop tattoo, to boot.

He could go to Seattle, but despite being a liberal town that's destroying itself by letting the homeless do whatever, it's a tougher environment, and much more expensive. For decades, Portland's been Seattle's nicer, more welcoming cousin; the cultures of the two cities are very different. Ask a noob question on any online Seattle community, and Seattleites will mock the shit out of you or give non-serious answers. Ask a similar question in a Portland community, and they'll actually give you an answer, and be nice about it. It was this way even before Amazon, Microsoft, and techbro culture invaded. And Portland is nowhere near as close to hitting Peak Homeless as Seattle is. I seriously expect Seattle to explode with anti-homeless backlash within the next few years, because too many Seattleites have seen what's happened to San Francisco (where every street is now a designated shitting street), and resistance is building behind that ultra-liberal facade.

It's not a very long or expensive bus ride from Seattle to Portland, so if he needs to stay within hailing distance of OHSU to see Dr. Dugi on occasion, I suppose he could manage it. Or he could move to Tacoma (a shithole trying to gentrify), or Olympia (the Wern's old stomping grounds, and home to Evergreen State University, a rapidly-dying elite SJW indoctrination facility). Eugene is his only other real option in the Pacific Northwest, with the exception of maybe Everett, WA, a city I am convinced has the lowest per capita number of people under 40 who still have more than half their teeth. Come to think of it, on any given day, Phil wouldn't be the worst-looking piece of human debris walking along Hoyt Avenue, so maybe that's his new spiritual homeland.

What do you think are the chances of Phil giving up and returning to live with his mom in NJ?
Zero and none. I really do think she's done with him. For her sake, and that of his other sibling (who is also disabled), I sincerely, fervently hope she's done with him.
Tommy Tooter is always looking for room-mates to fleece.
Ah, but he's in Arizona, which is deep in the Latino Danger Zone (as is Austin--or anywhere else in Texas--as somebody else suggested). And I can't see Phil moving to a red state, even if it is to a blue city.

Spudders might as well stay in Portland. Surely, his antifa comrades will help raise one of their fallen, cast down by the greedy, piggish, capitalist landowner class?

Bueller?

Bueller?
 
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