Telling the cops about all the drugs you do. Big-brained move there. Now tell him about your sexual conquests, Tommie.18:20 Tom- "I took real-deal LSD with famous people!!!"
Police auditor- "Wow. That's Awesome. You're a living legend."
I love how Tom just takes it as a given that everyone else is as degenerate as him, and shares the same adolescent fixation with drugs, as he has- even some middle-aged cop/bureaucrat. And how he's completely oblivious when people are mocking him right to his face.
But,I bet that cop will take Tom's complaint's even more seriously, after being so impressed with Tom's super-cool drug stories!!