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His writing is like if Chris Chan were a schizo on top of all his other problems he refuses to treat.


The man is probably an alien probe that crashed into Brazil after a nasty entry into the atmosphere. The damage scrambled its positronic brain but it still has enough of its base programming left to try and initiate first contact with the leadership of humanity. Unfortunately it's logic engines are totally fried and it had concluded that kiwifarms is the government of man and null moon is glorious leader.

You should respond carefully Null. First contact with aliens is no joke.


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First contact with aliens is no joke.
The fuck it isn't. The best Roswell story I ever heard alleged that the first soldier to approach the dying, shipwrecked alien saw that it was clutching a box, so he hit it with the butt of his rifle to get it to let go. I always imagined him gritting out: "Welcome to Earth."
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I went to high school with this guy, he would have been class of 2009 or 2010. Hes gained a ton of weight but that's about all that's changed. He was definitely this fucked back then. He was pretty known for having long conversations with himself on his facebook wall playing both sides of the conversation and with the same kinda shitty rap lyrics. I don't remember him being into drugs back then but that town was a hippie shit hole so it wouldn't surprise me.
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