4/2/2022 - Guntfest - Killstream KingPin - Ralph's Bowling Tournament - Gunt hosted a Bowling Tournament in Dallas, TX on April 2th.

[Cucktry Roads]

A thread to Discuss Ralph's bowling tournament. He started shilling it today. It will take place in some Bowling Alley in Dallas, TX. Tickets can be purchased and there are either 100 or 120 of them and cost $65 each. Ralph is just doing this to grift money from tickets before going to Wrestlemania on April 3rd.

Buy your tickets today and bring your tape measures!

Celebrity appearances:
Dick Masterson
Sam Harrison (some infowars guy)
Mersh
Royce
Tonka

 

[Beavis]

How much are tickets? I‘m shocked a dick would do something like this. Doesn‘t seem like there’s much money in it.

May should be due some time around then too.

 

[Fareal]

Hmmm, when's guntling number 2 due? Is it not around then? First babies are also more likely to be late. I wouldn't put it past him to arrange to be out of the state at the time he expects Meigh to be foaled.

 

[Mike Stoklasa]

Bowling is rad; this isn't Ralph's worst idea. I can't wait to see how he manages to fuck this one up.

Here's a poll for you: assuming this event even happens, does Ralph break 200?

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Hmmm, when's guntling number 2 due? Is it not around then? First babies are also more likely to be late. I wouldn't put it past him to arrange to be out of the state at the time he expects Meigh to be foaled.

It’s due in April, this is Ralph’s grand plan to make sure he never has to be in the same state when a poor woman gives birth to his child.

May will try to ruin it by going into labor/ faking labor.

 

[Neil]

Lol who the fuck is going to show up to a live event hosted by Ethan Ralph? Judging by characters like Faith and Augie, the entire venue is going to look like a high school homecoming dance with Gator standing in the background awkwardly while Dick and Vito try to hit on the youngest girls with daddy issues at the event.

 

[Killstream Kleanup Krew]

Ralph is planning ahead for the first time in his life and it involves him finding an excuse to miss his second child's birth. What a guy.

 

[Neil]

Ralph is planning ahead for the first time in his life and it involves him finding an excuse to miss his second child's birth. What a guy.

Wiggers gonna wig.

 

[AltisticRight]

Ralph evidently can't stand his horse bride.

How much are these tickets? Why would anyone buy it?

 

[ANiggaNamedElmo]

I think Ralph said it was April 3rd, not the 2nd. He's planning for Wrestlemania on the 2nd. Did I hear that wrong?

@AltisticRight I think he said tickets would be like 120 USD. Again, I may have misheard.

 

[Fannyscum]

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Isn't Meigh meant to be giving birth around that time?

 

[The Big Dream]

If May delivers late, Ralph's flight home will experience a mysterious diversion to Vegas for sure. Goddamn, what a wigger. And imagine his poor kid being told this story when they're older.

 

[MediocreMilt]

Is it wrong that my first thought was "I kinda want to go (without revealing myself as an ayylog in any way)"

Fuck's sake:

• Never been to Dallas
• See the GUNT first-hand
• participate in bowling
  • plus bowling tournament
• Call Null a pedo for the lulz and to not blow my cover

How much are tickets, famalam?

 

[ANiggaNamedElmo]

Is it wrong that my first thought was "I kinda want to go (without revealing myself as an ayylog in any way)"

Fuck's sake:

• Never been to Dallas
• See the GUNT first-hand
• participate in bowling
  • plus bowling tournament
• Call Null a pedo for the lulz and to not blow my cover

How much are tickets, famalam?

The pricetag from what I heard was $120 and that's fucking insane.

 

[Least Concern]

Tonka (maybe)

WTF, are you serious?

Please let Tonks hype it up for weeks and then never show his face again. He can blame it on the coof or whatever.

Here's a poll for you: assuming this event even happens, does Ralph break 200?

Pretty sure he broke 200 pounds a long time ago.

Oh, you meant his bowling score. Well, considering he's shaped like one of the balls but only half as intelligent, and he'll probably be pretty drunk at the time too, I'd be surprised if he gets two strikes (I'll give him one for free since it's quite possible to get a strike in bowling through dumb luck).

 

[Mike Stoklasa]

Oh, you meant his bowling score. Well, considering he's shaped like one of the balls but only half as intelligent, and he'll probably be pretty drunk at the time too, I'd be surprised if he gets two strikes (I'll give him one for free since it's quite possible to get a strike in bowling through dumb luck).

Maybe he'll use bumpers.

 

[Fannyscum]

Isn't Meigh meant to be giving birth around that time?

If she's exactly 9 weeks on Sept 17th, that puts conception at July 16th and a due date for April 16th. Strippers & bowling vacay with your wife ready to drop, stay classy Ralph.

 

[verifymejoshuaconnormoon]

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Isn't Meigh meant to be giving birth around that time?

yeah. i thought the date was written as the 4th of february cause it’s sooner but it’s really strange he schedules it right when babymama is supposed to be giving birth. maybe the bowling event will be his milk/cigarette run he never comes back from

 

[FFinfo]

Bowling is fun and all, but traveling to participate in a bowling tournament at $120 a ticket seems like a bit of a waste. I guess if Ralph's cultivated an audience of bowling hobbyists or something, but to go sit around unironic Ralph fans seems miserable for $120 plus travel and lodging. A bowling tournament is something you do as a larger part of a convention.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Will the Gunt get its own little matching bowling shirt or something?