JULAY
kiwifarms.net
To the tune of Gilbert & Sullivan's "I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major-General":
He is a fat Autistic and he always goes and shits his pants
Seeks sweethearts not for hanky panky rather for da true romance
He's terrified of trolls because he thinks they all are homo gays
And wants nothing more than to return to high school and his glory days
He spends his time playing with vidya games and with da children's toys
He never went to pep rallies because of all da real loud noise
He used to eat his lunches with all his many gal-pal friends
Thinks he never dated 'cause he was naive 'bout dating then
But da gal-pals thought that he was weird and that he really really smelled
Because he's a fat autistic and he always goes and shits himself
He hates da Males because they're just a bunch of girlfriend stealing JERKS
He sits with signs advertising himself but yet it never works
He writes WANT WOMAN in big letters all over his manly bra
And can't quite grasp why this results in no interest from girls at all
His idea was to loudly sing and play his games and always pace
Or to loiter for hours on end in a random public place
He throws notes with rocks and uses paper hearts that are attached to strings
Instead of girls these methods result in arrests and other things
She must be skinny, white and have a car, live close by, and have some wealth
Yet he remains a fat autist who always goes and shits himself
No need to get a job as long as da tugboat still sails right in
Bob set it up so he never even has to try and work again
The majority of food he eats is Hungry Mans and McDonalds
They make him fat so when he walks its really more of a waddle
His broken penis looks as if it snapped just like a piece of wood
But da Cherokian Hooker said that it was really big and good
His girlish locks can't hide the fact that he is losing all his hair
And nothing tops his infamously autistically creepy stare
He would do well to start to try and do something about his health
But he's a fat autistic and he always goes and shits himself
To go back to the Game Place and play Pokeymans is his greatest want
But that dirty Jew Snyder stops him, also Megan who's a cunt
Those trolling stupids are just playing games in which they kick autists
But if let back in all da stress would result in briefs caked with shit
So in da hoard with Barb he will continue to sigh from da stress
Wearing muscle bras to hold in his giant and yet manly breasts
To whine on Facebook for a sweetheart is his single daily task
Along with placing bandages on Snorlax's Big Holey Ass
Sometimes he'll go up to his room to grab his Legos off the shelf
Because he's a fat autistic and he always goes and shits himself!
He is a fat Autistic and he always goes and shits his pants
Seeks sweethearts not for hanky panky rather for da true romance
He's terrified of trolls because he thinks they all are homo gays
And wants nothing more than to return to high school and his glory days
He spends his time playing with vidya games and with da children's toys
He never went to pep rallies because of all da real loud noise
He used to eat his lunches with all his many gal-pal friends
Thinks he never dated 'cause he was naive 'bout dating then
But da gal-pals thought that he was weird and that he really really smelled
Because he's a fat autistic and he always goes and shits himself
He hates da Males because they're just a bunch of girlfriend stealing JERKS
He sits with signs advertising himself but yet it never works
He writes WANT WOMAN in big letters all over his manly bra
And can't quite grasp why this results in no interest from girls at all
His idea was to loudly sing and play his games and always pace
Or to loiter for hours on end in a random public place
He throws notes with rocks and uses paper hearts that are attached to strings
Instead of girls these methods result in arrests and other things
She must be skinny, white and have a car, live close by, and have some wealth
Yet he remains a fat autist who always goes and shits himself
No need to get a job as long as da tugboat still sails right in
Bob set it up so he never even has to try and work again
The majority of food he eats is Hungry Mans and McDonalds
They make him fat so when he walks its really more of a waddle
His broken penis looks as if it snapped just like a piece of wood
But da Cherokian Hooker said that it was really big and good
His girlish locks can't hide the fact that he is losing all his hair
And nothing tops his infamously autistically creepy stare
He would do well to start to try and do something about his health
But he's a fat autistic and he always goes and shits himself
To go back to the Game Place and play Pokeymans is his greatest want
But that dirty Jew Snyder stops him, also Megan who's a cunt
Those trolling stupids are just playing games in which they kick autists
But if let back in all da stress would result in briefs caked with shit
So in da hoard with Barb he will continue to sigh from da stress
Wearing muscle bras to hold in his giant and yet manly breasts
To whine on Facebook for a sweetheart is his single daily task
Along with placing bandages on Snorlax's Big Holey Ass
Sometimes he'll go up to his room to grab his Legos off the shelf
Because he's a fat autistic and he always goes and shits himself!
Bravo! Bravo! Encore! 
, I think this could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
