Adam Kovic & Ryan Haywood (The Dead Pixel / Koko / Pikovic, and James Ryan Haywoood / Iron Ryan / The Mad King / Vagabond) - Rooster Teeth associates who've sent horrifying nudes behind their families's backs in what looks like a gay catfish

How many accusers will there be by the 23rd?

  • 9

    Votes: 5 0.7%
  • 10 ~ 12

    Votes: 91 12.0%
  • 13 ~ 15

    Votes: 273 36.0%
  • 16 ~ 18

    Votes: 185 24.4%
  • 19 or 20

    Votes: 44 5.8%
  • More than 20

    Votes: 161 21.2%

  • Total voters
    759
  • Poll closed .

batigol

kiwifarms.net
Please let this be true. If they aren't bullshitting then Ryan is literally Hitler (in one way).


picture1.png
 

IneptRobot

Death and cigarettes
kiwifarms.net
Screenshot_20201015-094117_Reddit.jpg
This reddit post was the prevailing view in the RT tarddom until a week ago. Complete idol worship to the point RTards were getting tattoos of his signature and he endorsed it.
What kind of retard am I that I immediately thought that that account was fake. Ends in 88, has Storm in the name? I instantly thinks it's a troll. I need to leave the house more.
 

fruity idiot

kiwifarms.net
i get that RT ruined themselves for the sake of WOKENESS, but i disagree that ryan was one of those bastions. he seems like gus in the way that he'd give todd howard a reach around if it meant getting the newest re-release of skyrim early, but he never struck me as one of the ones who so willingly changed their tune and gobbled the woke-cock to appeal to the new wave of diaper wearing tumblrites like jack, geoff and michael.

then again, i stopped watching around the time fullscreen acquired them, so the only recent clips/videos i've seen are ones like ryan arguing with lindsay about gender equality n shit which was only a couple months ago (posted way earlier in this thread too.)
 

Captain Manning

I have neither the fucks or anime avatars to give.
kiwifarms.net
Love that she called it "Moderating Career". "Previous work experience? Yeah, I was an unpaid internet janitor."

Bro. You don't understand. He was her BOSS! It's all about that POWER DYNAMIC... or POWER IMBALANCE... or whatever the fuck gay shit term they're using to craft victimhood out of nothing more than being an Internet janny.

Please let this be true. If they aren't bullshitting then Ryan is literally Hitler (in one way).


View attachment 1663936

LOL!

Yes. I want this to be true too. Very much so.
 

Bad Take Crucifier

A-Log Demon Dogs, Blessed Boobies
kiwifarms.net

Yeah that needs to go in the archive.

Everything this man has ever done is aging like a fucking landfill fire.

EDIT: As @fruity idiot pointed out, Mr. Diddles was Ray's character. Unfortunately, he accidentally made a character that's a cosplay of Ryan Haywood.
 
Last edited:

JesusChristSuperstar

kiwifarms.net
Please let this be true. If they aren't bullshitting then Ryan is literally Hitler (in one way).


View attachment 1663936

SHUT UP if Achievement Hunter employed TWO people with only one proper ballsack lmaoooooooo

(Gavin has talked about his testicular torsion on RT podcast #153 before. I can only find fan made animations with bits of the audio [part 1 part 2].. I didn't realize that alot of older Drunk Tanks and RT podcasts were gone?? They must have gotten them in their first wave of woke a while ago, dang.)

Edit: Also archive of those tweets.
 
Last edited:

Mason Verger

was she a great big healthy at any size person?
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
They're hoping further accusers will just "vent" to them instead of going public with their accusations. There's zero chance RT will make anything they get public or forward it on to law enforcement (or anyone at all, really). It's damage control pure and simple. They might even try to dox/scare/bribe accusers into silence if they think they can get away with it.
I think if it’s Ryan related(and doesn’t directly connect to RT in any way too damning) or some disposable RT drone, they’ll happily pull the trigger. Just for the sake of optics alone.

If it’s a report on any remaining (popular) cast members or RT management(which will 100% roll in, trolling or not), they will bury that shit for all they’re worth.
 

Yaniv’s Hairy Balls

Behold them and W A X
kiwifarms.net
You know, it's weird, but my father was one of those guys. Whenever there was a news story about a female teacher fucking a male student, he would make some comment about wishing those teachers were around when he was in high school.

This South Park episode is not some shit they made up. It's a pretty pervasive viewpoint in society.


Reverse the genders, and it's torches and pitchforks for everyone.

Here's a uncomfortable question: If we swap out Ryan for Meg, and the fangirls for fanboys, what would this thread look like now?
Just check out cinniepie’s section in the “smash child molesters” mega thread . She was shady af about what she was doing and iirc it was maybe one guy and we were pretty disgusted and pissed. There may have been SOME of that, but most ppl were like “nah fuck that”. Kiwi Farms is a fair and loving kind of autism.
 

Space Retard

kiwifarms.net
Yeah that needs to go in the archive.

Everything this man has ever done is aging like a fucking landfill fire.
View attachment 1663959
Being an old fan, it's sort of sad seeing their old let's plays. It just felt like 6 guys having a good time and takes me back to comfier times. It's crazy to think about how much their lives have changed since this video; the Ryan shit, Gavin almost getting his head blown off, Geoffs family falling apart, and AH/RT going down a death slide.


Ray jumped ship at the exact right time, so fair play to him.
 

Jack Awful

Laughs at Tards
kiwifarms.net
Didn't think it was worth posting yesterday but one of his mods already made a show of doing that.

View attachment 1663771

View attachment 1663774
https://tw.tinf.io/GranDaddySkulls/status/1316075209666035718
[archive]

Also this mod had a Ryan tattoo too it turns out (they say they'd already covered it years in the original tweet's thread) and she got pressed someone was making fun of her for it

View attachment 1663777
https://tw.tinf.io/GranDaddySkulls/status/1316560432426082304
[archive]

Please do direct us, since it is pretty funny.



She mentioned in her instagram video about it that her parents were in contact with the FBI and police and she's been going to therapy about the whole thing so that's the minimum squared away. She says she doesn't want to "wear hoodies the rest of her life" and doesn't want it to affect her... I definitely would agree that sounds like more of the mom's influence. When I first heard about this I was very surprised to see she was still posting on instagram still at all. Granted I've never raised kids so wouldn't know at all how difficult it would be to do but I would want to pull a daughter off social media as well if this happened to them. (At least instagram. She could still maybe make idiot tweets if she wanted.)
Obvious reason Ryan singled her out as a mod.
VUqVc4n9_400x400.jpg
 

Analog Devolved

kiwifarms.net

NEW ACCUSER ALERT! Victim #8 comes forward with receipts. Warning, extremely long spoiler.
20201015_110230.jpg20201015_110227.jpgScreenshot_20201015-110204_Samsung Internet.jpg

Okay. Let’s do this.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how to write this. I’ve been grappling quite a bit with the idea of not
fitting the “demographic” of Ryan Haywood’s various victims. I’m older, first of all. I’m 32. And
secondly- I’m married.
Since all of this has started coming out, I’ve had this fear. I’m older. I should have understood. I
should have known what was happening to me and I could have stopped it at any point.
Should’ve known better. Could’ve said no. Shouldn’t have been starstruck by- honestly- a D List
Internet Celebrity, at best.
I was 30 in November of 2018. I’d been struggling to come to terms with the idea of being
polyamorous. My husband and I had made a few cracks about finding another girlfriend but I
was afraid to label myself as polyam for a long, long time. I found out later that Ryan had
mentioned to someone else that I was in an “open relationship” which was not entirely the case.
Maybe that was on me. Maybe I hadn’t been clear that November when we spent an entire
weekend talking nonstop and I confided in him that I was struggling to figure out how to apply
that term to myself and came out to him about it. I’d mentioned I hadn’t even been comfortable
using it when speaking to my husband at that point, so I think that may have been a catalyst for
him to mention his personal marital problems.
If you’ve read any of the other stories, you probably know what he told me. I don’t think I need to
elaborate any more on how he blamed his flirtatiousness, or forwardness, on his wife’s reluctant
intimacy. It just feels wrong to keep talking about that. So I would like to clarify something at this
moment: I did not assume Ryan’s relationship itself was open. I...had foolishly hoped that it was.
When you yourself are a certain type of person, you selfishly hope that others are as well. I
never asked because I was afraid to and only found out for sure that it wasn’t later on. We
talked about him and his wife possibly going to therapy. I tried to give advice as far as him
sitting down with her and having a real discussion about their lack of intimacy. This man that I
looked up to, that I admired, felt trapped and wanted intimacy. I felt bad for him.
I know now that was what he wanted me to feel.
We spent the whole weekend after Thanksgiving chatting. He told me I could tell him to stop
flirting if I was not comfortable with it. I told him it was fine. I felt weird since I had yet to discuss
this with my husband but this was new and exciting and I liked Ryan. I thought we were going to
be friends.
Obviously we were never going to be friends. He called me his friend. Four months ago, when I
approached him about where we stood, what kind of a relationship we could even call it, he said
we were friends. I brought this up to him as recently as last weekend when he claimed that “no
one told me how they felt.” I did. I did many times. And I think others did too. He never wanted
to hear any of us until we started speaking out.
We flirted pretty heavily throughout the end of the year. I asked if I was the only girl at the time,
and he said that while he’d done this with other girls, yes, I was currently the only one. He didn’t
have the “capacity” to flirt with multiple girls at once. But I was beginning to feel pretty fucking
horrible about it come December. I expressed this to him multiple times- the guilt and shame I
could feel starting to build up over it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. He tried so hard to
keep us all alone and in the dark. Even in some of my darkest moments, he said he hoped that
no matter what happened, I could keep this quiet.
I asked him once if he thought I was a bad person. He said not any more bad than he was. At
the time, I felt comforted by it. Now, it fucking hurts like hell. I thought I was helping this person I
trusted find an outlet for something he needed and wasn’t getting. And it was addictive, and fun,
even when I had my doubts.
Let’s get a more concise timeline going.
November 2018 is when this started to spiral. The photos, some that were tame, some of him
shirtless (still tame, but with more intent). The flirting.
December 2018 I had very serious thoughts about committing suicide. I was keeping this deep,
dark secret from so many people I loved. I had heard rumors that someone was spreading
about one of the other girls, approached him about it, and he lied. Not for the first time and
absolutely not for the last time. I found out for certain later that month that I was not the only girl
he was fucking around with and had a breakdown. But I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
January 2019 he offered to fly me out to Austin to have sex. I finally talked to my husband about
it. He said I could do it. I had sorted my end out- I tried to separate my issues from Ryan’s.
February 2019 I went on my trip. He came to my hotel a couple times. We’d have sex, hang out
a bit, and then he’d leave. Once I’d returned from my trip, he ghosted me. It was 2-3 weeks of
radio silence. I felt horrible and disgusting. What had happened that suddenly I was no longer
worth talking to? Weren’t we friends? This person had given me confidence in myself, had given
me the attention that I’d craved from someone just like him, and then had the gall to rip it out of
my hands? I started going to therapy. I lost myself somewhere along the way, lost pieces of
myself to Ryan, and I needed some semblance of stability.
March 2019 we started talking again, more sporadically than before. I started planning a trip to
Austin in May for my birthday. I was learning to be okay with the breaks in communication. It
had gone from daily to weekly in 4 months but I would take what I could get.
May 2019 I went back to Austin. We’d discussed the possibility of meeting up. He’d just had a
loss in his family so the timing was bad; it was up in the air. He worked it out eventually and
came over after work one day.
Skip to July 2019. He had a hotel for RTX and I went over there one night. Same as before- had
sex, hung out, left. I have some photos but they’re not very incriminating and I know they will get
questioned. One is of me in the hotel room with his bag behind me and another is of his
nightstand with his wedding band and a pin that someone had given him that day on it.
There was more random communication between this. Whenever he felt like reaching out. It
sucked. I was desperate and needy. I wanted his attention. He didn’t want to give it. He was
tiring of me and wouldn’t admit it but I could feel it. I’d gained weight over this timeframe and felt
worse about myself than ever before. He’d gone from calling me beautiful to ignoring every
advance I made- and I did make them, I wanted to feel special again- and telling me he wasn’t
flirting with anyone and hadn’t been for a while (an excuse that ran its face into the wall over
and over again in 2020 too).
October 2019 was the last time I saw him. I was in town for ACL. I stayed with a friend for half
the time and got a hotel near his work for the rest of the trip. He came over once in the morning
and left almost right afterward. While he was there, I expressed to his face that I liked the
attention and hated that he felt like he could take it away. He said he was sorry. I knew he
wasn’t.
We sexted a bit during this whole time but not very much. Maybe a few times. Everything was
consensual. I continued to poke and prod in 2020 with the desire for attention. I once again told
Ryan how he was making me feel and how much it hurt. He once again gave me a half-assed
apology and proceeded to tell me he didn’t like to get very deep on the “feelings” scale. I didn’t
want feelings. I wanted to be heard, as his “friend.”
I’d also approached him a few times about other girls I thought he may have been flirting with
and once again was lied to with the same excuses as before. He was slowing down in his old
age, according to him. Then we stopped talking for 3-4 months. Until all of this started. I reacted
to him with sympathy; I didn’t want his life to be ruined any more than my own. I’ve already
posted a few of those screenshots. I didn’t get harassed to the extent as the other girls did. But
he told me he’d just started learning about “power imbalances” which turned out to be a
bald-faced lie considering he’d told another girl long before this that he was aware there was a
power imbalance between them. He has previously also suggested that just because I am older
than the other girls, I knew what I was getting into, insinuating that I did not really need any
apologies from him for him taking advantage of his power over me as someone who admired
him.
Nonetheless, there will likely never be a point where I am not sorry for my part in this. He is at
fault but I will never, ever not be sorry. I’m sorry to Achievement Hunter, who I love, and loved
volunteering for, and my team there that I feel like I betrayed. I’m sorry to this community, that
has given me everything. I’m sorry to my friends, many of whom had to keep secrets for me for
years. I’m sorry to a family that is now in pieces. I’m sorry to my husband, for getting caught up
in the excitement of something, and forgoing details.
I’m not fucking sorry to Ryan Haywood. I’m not sorry to the man that told lie on top of lie on top
of lie. I’m not fucking sorry to the monster that brushed me aside when he was tired of me and
made me look, and feel, desperate, and needy. I’m not sorry to this desperate animal that hurt
so many girls and then dared to tell them not to tell their fucking stories.
“Not any more bad a person than I am.” I’m a thousand fucking times better than you could ever
hope to be. And stronger every day.
 

YayLasagna

Cuddly Spacebug
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net

NEW ACCUSER ALERT! Victim #8 comes forward with receipts. Warning, extremely long spoiler.
View attachment 1664035View attachment 1664036View attachment 1664037

Okay. Let’s do this.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how to write this. I’ve been grappling quite a bit with the idea of not
fitting the “demographic” of Ryan Haywood’s various victims. I’m older, first of all. I’m 32. And
secondly- I’m married.
Since all of this has started coming out, I’ve had this fear. I’m older. I should have understood. I
should have known what was happening to me and I could have stopped it at any point.
Should’ve known better. Could’ve said no. Shouldn’t have been starstruck by- honestly- a D List
Internet Celebrity, at best.
I was 30 in November of 2018. I’d been struggling to come to terms with the idea of being
polyamorous. My husband and I had made a few cracks about finding another girlfriend but I
was afraid to label myself as polyam for a long, long time. I found out later that Ryan had
mentioned to someone else that I was in an “open relationship” which was not entirely the case.
Maybe that was on me. Maybe I hadn’t been clear that November when we spent an entire
weekend talking nonstop and I confided in him that I was struggling to figure out how to apply
that term to myself and came out to him about it. I’d mentioned I hadn’t even been comfortable
using it when speaking to my husband at that point, so I think that may have been a catalyst for
him to mention his personal marital problems.
If you’ve read any of the other stories, you probably know what he told me. I don’t think I need to
elaborate any more on how he blamed his flirtatiousness, or forwardness, on his wife’s reluctant
intimacy. It just feels wrong to keep talking about that. So I would like to clarify something at this
moment: I did not assume Ryan’s relationship itself was open. I...had foolishly hoped that it was.
When you yourself are a certain type of person, you selfishly hope that others are as well. I
never asked because I was afraid to and only found out for sure that it wasn’t later on. We
talked about him and his wife possibly going to therapy. I tried to give advice as far as him
sitting down with her and having a real discussion about their lack of intimacy. This man that I
looked up to, that I admired, felt trapped and wanted intimacy. I felt bad for him.
I know now that was what he wanted me to feel.
We spent the whole weekend after Thanksgiving chatting. He told me I could tell him to stop
flirting if I was not comfortable with it. I told him it was fine. I felt weird since I had yet to discuss
this with my husband but this was new and exciting and I liked Ryan. I thought we were going to
be friends.
Obviously we were never going to be friends. He called me his friend. Four months ago, when I
approached him about where we stood, what kind of a relationship we could even call it, he said
we were friends. I brought this up to him as recently as last weekend when he claimed that “no
one told me how they felt.” I did. I did many times. And I think others did too. He never wanted
to hear any of us until we started speaking out.
We flirted pretty heavily throughout the end of the year. I asked if I was the only girl at the time,
and he said that while he’d done this with other girls, yes, I was currently the only one. He didn’t
have the “capacity” to flirt with multiple girls at once. But I was beginning to feel pretty fucking
horrible about it come December. I expressed this to him multiple times- the guilt and shame I
could feel starting to build up over it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. He tried so hard to
keep us all alone and in the dark. Even in some of my darkest moments, he said he hoped that
no matter what happened, I could keep this quiet.
I asked him once if he thought I was a bad person. He said not any more bad than he was. At
the time, I felt comforted by it. Now, it fucking hurts like hell. I thought I was helping this person I
trusted find an outlet for something he needed and wasn’t getting. And it was addictive, and fun,
even when I had my doubts.
Let’s get a more concise timeline going.
November 2018 is when this started to spiral. The photos, some that were tame, some of him
shirtless (still tame, but with more intent). The flirting.
December 2018 I had very serious thoughts about committing suicide. I was keeping this deep,
dark secret from so many people I loved. I had heard rumors that someone was spreading
about one of the other girls, approached him about it, and he lied. Not for the first time and
absolutely not for the last time. I found out for certain later that month that I was not the only girl
he was fucking around with and had a breakdown. But I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
January 2019 he offered to fly me out to Austin to have sex. I finally talked to my husband about
it. He said I could do it. I had sorted my end out- I tried to separate my issues from Ryan’s.
February 2019 I went on my trip. He came to my hotel a couple times. We’d have sex, hang out
a bit, and then he’d leave. Once I’d returned from my trip, he ghosted me. It was 2-3 weeks of
radio silence. I felt horrible and disgusting. What had happened that suddenly I was no longer
worth talking to? Weren’t we friends? This person had given me confidence in myself, had given
me the attention that I’d craved from someone just like him, and then had the gall to rip it out of
my hands? I started going to therapy. I lost myself somewhere along the way, lost pieces of
myself to Ryan, and I needed some semblance of stability.
March 2019 we started talking again, more sporadically than before. I started planning a trip to
Austin in May for my birthday. I was learning to be okay with the breaks in communication. It
had gone from daily to weekly in 4 months but I would take what I could get.
May 2019 I went back to Austin. We’d discussed the possibility of meeting up. He’d just had a
loss in his family so the timing was bad; it was up in the air. He worked it out eventually and
came over after work one day.
Skip to July 2019. He had a hotel for RTX and I went over there one night. Same as before- had
sex, hung out, left. I have some photos but they’re not very incriminating and I know they will get
questioned. One is of me in the hotel room with his bag behind me and another is of his
nightstand with his wedding band and a pin that someone had given him that day on it.
There was more random communication between this. Whenever he felt like reaching out. It
sucked. I was desperate and needy. I wanted his attention. He didn’t want to give it. He was
tiring of me and wouldn’t admit it but I could feel it. I’d gained weight over this timeframe and felt
worse about myself than ever before. He’d gone from calling me beautiful to ignoring every
advance I made- and I did make them, I wanted to feel special again- and telling me he wasn’t
flirting with anyone and hadn’t been for a while (an excuse that ran its face into the wall over
and over again in 2020 too).
October 2019 was the last time I saw him. I was in town for ACL. I stayed with a friend for half
the time and got a hotel near his work for the rest of the trip. He came over once in the morning
and left almost right afterward. While he was there, I expressed to his face that I liked the
attention and hated that he felt like he could take it away. He said he was sorry. I knew he
wasn’t.
We sexted a bit during this whole time but not very much. Maybe a few times. Everything was
consensual. I continued to poke and prod in 2020 with the desire for attention. I once again told
Ryan how he was making me feel and how much it hurt. He once again gave me a half-assed
apology and proceeded to tell me he didn’t like to get very deep on the “feelings” scale. I didn’t
want feelings. I wanted to be heard, as his “friend.”
I’d also approached him a few times about other girls I thought he may have been flirting with
and once again was lied to with the same excuses as before. He was slowing down in his old
age, according to him. Then we stopped talking for 3-4 months. Until all of this started. I reacted
to him with sympathy; I didn’t want his life to be ruined any more than my own. I’ve already
posted a few of those screenshots. I didn’t get harassed to the extent as the other girls did. But
he told me he’d just started learning about “power imbalances” which turned out to be a
bald-faced lie considering he’d told another girl long before this that he was aware there was a
power imbalance between them. He has previously also suggested that just because I am older
than the other girls, I knew what I was getting into, insinuating that I did not really need any
apologies from him for him taking advantage of his power over me as someone who admired
him.
Nonetheless, there will likely never be a point where I am not sorry for my part in this. He is at
fault but I will never, ever not be sorry. I’m sorry to Achievement Hunter, who I love, and loved
volunteering for, and my team there that I feel like I betrayed. I’m sorry to this community, that
has given me everything. I’m sorry to my friends, many of whom had to keep secrets for me for
years. I’m sorry to a family that is now in pieces. I’m sorry to my husband, for getting caught up
in the excitement of something, and forgoing details.
I’m not fucking sorry to Ryan Haywood. I’m not sorry to the man that told lie on top of lie on top
of lie. I’m not fucking sorry to the monster that brushed me aside when he was tired of me and
made me look, and feel, desperate, and needy. I’m not sorry to this desperate animal that hurt
so many girls and then dared to tell them not to tell their fucking stories.
“Not any more bad a person than I am.” I’m a thousand fucking times better than you could ever
hope to be. And stronger every day.
And they don't stop coming And they don't stop coming And they don't stop coming And they don't stop coming And they don't stop coming

 
Last edited:

moocow

Moo.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Freckles sounded familiar to me, so I looked at Ryan's twitch again.
View attachment 1663080
How much money is that in like actual currency?
If those are "bits", they're worth a penny each and the streamer gets 100% of it. Twitch makes their money on those by charging a % fee to the person buying them.

Is it possible that legal action could be taken against Haywood to recoup this lost income?

If it is, how would this affect his (ex) wife?
Nah. Employees screw up in huge ways all the time and cost companies millions in losses and don't get held personally liable for it. If it worked that way, there'd be a lot of pajeets right now with judgments against them for their bungling of the flight software on Boeing's 737-MAX.

I always just think of this video:


I mean it just comes off as childish really. Like when as a kid you would just scream the same thing over and over so the other person couldn't talk.
Also a very popular practice in the black community, especially among the women. Neck waggling comes with that, too.
 

Autistic

Please be patient I have autism...
kiwifarms.net

NEW ACCUSER ALERT! Victim #8 comes forward with receipts. Warning, extremely long spoiler.
View attachment 1664035View attachment 1664036View attachment 1664037

Okay. Let’s do this.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how to write this. I’ve been grappling quite a bit with the idea of not
fitting the “demographic” of Ryan Haywood’s various victims. I’m older, first of all. I’m 32. And
secondly- I’m married.
Since all of this has started coming out, I’ve had this fear. I’m older. I should have understood. I
should have known what was happening to me and I could have stopped it at any point.
Should’ve known better. Could’ve said no. Shouldn’t have been starstruck by- honestly- a D List
Internet Celebrity, at best.
I was 30 in November of 2018. I’d been struggling to come to terms with the idea of being
polyamorous. My husband and I had made a few cracks about finding another girlfriend but I
was afraid to label myself as polyam for a long, long time. I found out later that Ryan had
mentioned to someone else that I was in an “open relationship” which was not entirely the case.
Maybe that was on me. Maybe I hadn’t been clear that November when we spent an entire
weekend talking nonstop and I confided in him that I was struggling to figure out how to apply
that term to myself and came out to him about it. I’d mentioned I hadn’t even been comfortable
using it when speaking to my husband at that point, so I think that may have been a catalyst for
him to mention his personal marital problems.
If you’ve read any of the other stories, you probably know what he told me. I don’t think I need to
elaborate any more on how he blamed his flirtatiousness, or forwardness, on his wife’s reluctant
intimacy. It just feels wrong to keep talking about that. So I would like to clarify something at this
moment: I did not assume Ryan’s relationship itself was open. I...had foolishly hoped that it was.
When you yourself are a certain type of person, you selfishly hope that others are as well. I
never asked because I was afraid to and only found out for sure that it wasn’t later on. We
talked about him and his wife possibly going to therapy. I tried to give advice as far as him
sitting down with her and having a real discussion about their lack of intimacy. This man that I
looked up to, that I admired, felt trapped and wanted intimacy. I felt bad for him.
I know now that was what he wanted me to feel.
We spent the whole weekend after Thanksgiving chatting. He told me I could tell him to stop
flirting if I was not comfortable with it. I told him it was fine. I felt weird since I had yet to discuss
this with my husband but this was new and exciting and I liked Ryan. I thought we were going to
be friends.
Obviously we were never going to be friends. He called me his friend. Four months ago, when I
approached him about where we stood, what kind of a relationship we could even call it, he said
we were friends. I brought this up to him as recently as last weekend when he claimed that “no
one told me how they felt.” I did. I did many times. And I think others did too. He never wanted
to hear any of us until we started speaking out.
We flirted pretty heavily throughout the end of the year. I asked if I was the only girl at the time,
and he said that while he’d done this with other girls, yes, I was currently the only one. He didn’t
have the “capacity” to flirt with multiple girls at once. But I was beginning to feel pretty fucking
horrible about it come December. I expressed this to him multiple times- the guilt and shame I
could feel starting to build up over it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. He tried so hard to
keep us all alone and in the dark. Even in some of my darkest moments, he said he hoped that
no matter what happened, I could keep this quiet.
I asked him once if he thought I was a bad person. He said not any more bad than he was. At
the time, I felt comforted by it. Now, it fucking hurts like hell. I thought I was helping this person I
trusted find an outlet for something he needed and wasn’t getting. And it was addictive, and fun,
even when I had my doubts.
Let’s get a more concise timeline going.
November 2018 is when this started to spiral. The photos, some that were tame, some of him
shirtless (still tame, but with more intent). The flirting.
December 2018 I had very serious thoughts about committing suicide. I was keeping this deep,
dark secret from so many people I loved. I had heard rumors that someone was spreading
about one of the other girls, approached him about it, and he lied. Not for the first time and
absolutely not for the last time. I found out for certain later that month that I was not the only girl
he was fucking around with and had a breakdown. But I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
January 2019 he offered to fly me out to Austin to have sex. I finally talked to my husband about
it. He said I could do it. I had sorted my end out- I tried to separate my issues from Ryan’s.
February 2019 I went on my trip. He came to my hotel a couple times. We’d have sex, hang out
a bit, and then he’d leave. Once I’d returned from my trip, he ghosted me. It was 2-3 weeks of
radio silence. I felt horrible and disgusting. What had happened that suddenly I was no longer
worth talking to? Weren’t we friends? This person had given me confidence in myself, had given
me the attention that I’d craved from someone just like him, and then had the gall to rip it out of
my hands? I started going to therapy. I lost myself somewhere along the way, lost pieces of
myself to Ryan, and I needed some semblance of stability.
March 2019 we started talking again, more sporadically than before. I started planning a trip to
Austin in May for my birthday. I was learning to be okay with the breaks in communication. It
had gone from daily to weekly in 4 months but I would take what I could get.
May 2019 I went back to Austin. We’d discussed the possibility of meeting up. He’d just had a
loss in his family so the timing was bad; it was up in the air. He worked it out eventually and
came over after work one day.
Skip to July 2019. He had a hotel for RTX and I went over there one night. Same as before- had
sex, hung out, left. I have some photos but they’re not very incriminating and I know they will get
questioned. One is of me in the hotel room with his bag behind me and another is of his
nightstand with his wedding band and a pin that someone had given him that day on it.
There was more random communication between this. Whenever he felt like reaching out. It
sucked. I was desperate and needy. I wanted his attention. He didn’t want to give it. He was
tiring of me and wouldn’t admit it but I could feel it. I’d gained weight over this timeframe and felt
worse about myself than ever before. He’d gone from calling me beautiful to ignoring every
advance I made- and I did make them, I wanted to feel special again- and telling me he wasn’t
flirting with anyone and hadn’t been for a while (an excuse that ran its face into the wall over
and over again in 2020 too).
October 2019 was the last time I saw him. I was in town for ACL. I stayed with a friend for half
the time and got a hotel near his work for the rest of the trip. He came over once in the morning
and left almost right afterward. While he was there, I expressed to his face that I liked the
attention and hated that he felt like he could take it away. He said he was sorry. I knew he
wasn’t.
We sexted a bit during this whole time but not very much. Maybe a few times. Everything was
consensual. I continued to poke and prod in 2020 with the desire for attention. I once again told
Ryan how he was making me feel and how much it hurt. He once again gave me a half-assed
apology and proceeded to tell me he didn’t like to get very deep on the “feelings” scale. I didn’t
want feelings. I wanted to be heard, as his “friend.”
I’d also approached him a few times about other girls I thought he may have been flirting with
and once again was lied to with the same excuses as before. He was slowing down in his old
age, according to him. Then we stopped talking for 3-4 months. Until all of this started. I reacted
to him with sympathy; I didn’t want his life to be ruined any more than my own. I’ve already
posted a few of those screenshots. I didn’t get harassed to the extent as the other girls did. But
he told me he’d just started learning about “power imbalances” which turned out to be a
bald-faced lie considering he’d told another girl long before this that he was aware there was a
power imbalance between them. He has previously also suggested that just because I am older
than the other girls, I knew what I was getting into, insinuating that I did not really need any
apologies from him for him taking advantage of his power over me as someone who admired
him.
Nonetheless, there will likely never be a point where I am not sorry for my part in this. He is at
fault but I will never, ever not be sorry. I’m sorry to Achievement Hunter, who I love, and loved
volunteering for, and my team there that I feel like I betrayed. I’m sorry to this community, that
has given me everything. I’m sorry to my friends, many of whom had to keep secrets for me for
years. I’m sorry to a family that is now in pieces. I’m sorry to my husband, for getting caught up
in the excitement of something, and forgoing details.
I’m not fucking sorry to Ryan Haywood. I’m not sorry to the man that told lie on top of lie on top
of lie. I’m not fucking sorry to the monster that brushed me aside when he was tired of me and
made me look, and feel, desperate, and needy. I’m not sorry to this desperate animal that hurt
so many girls and then dared to tell them not to tell their fucking stories.
“Not any more bad a person than I am.” I’m a thousand fucking times better than you could ever
hope to be. And stronger every day.
Lol wow , a 32-year old married women. I have officially reached the state of giving zero fucks. You are a grown ass women fuck off with this pitty me shit you are the same as him. You had control over your actions and cheated.

I really see nothing more damning coming out only groupies that hopped on his dick that now want to save their asses.
 

Jann_Hörn

Mir egal was sie gibt, ich hab' nie Genug
kiwifarms.net
1602774862854.png

Archive
Alfredo is an employee of RT, right?
1602774916234.png

She has retweeted all of the previous victim accusations.
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She was on RTTV for an interview as well.
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1602775177040.png


1602775252912.png
1602775317839.png

1602775620691.png

1602775823336.png
1602776053965.png

1602776094469.png
1602776142413.png

1602776286718.png
1602776599920.png

1602776940897.png
1602777082916.png

We flirted pretty heavily throughout the end of the year. I asked if I was the only girl at the time,
and he said that while he’d done this with other girls, yes, I was currently the only one. He didn’t
have the “capacity” to flirt with multiple girls at once. But I was beginning to feel pretty fucking
horrible about it come December. I expressed this to him multiple times- the guilt and shame I
could feel starting to build up over it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. He tried so hard to
keep us all alone and in the dark. Even in some of my darkest moments, he said he hoped that
no matter what happened, I could keep this quiet. ...
December 2018 I had very serious thoughts about committing suicide. I was keeping this deep,
dark secret from so many people I loved. I had heard rumors that someone was spreading
about one of the other girls, approached him about it, and he lied. Not for the first time and
absolutely not for the last time. I found out for certain later that month that I was not the only girl
he was fucking around with and had a breakdown. But I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
I am beginning to doubt the motivations of her Ryan exposed post. Here in December 2018, she states that Ryan is one of her favorite people in the world, yet in her letter she is claiming in December that she was at her lowest point. Granted, the timeline is not exactly concise but it seems there are two differing stories being offered here. One story being of adoration until as recently as September, and the other of he was always being abusive of me
 
Last edited:

JesusChristSuperstar

kiwifarms.net

NEW ACCUSER ALERT! Victim #8 comes forward with receipts. Warning, extremely long spoiler.
View attachment 1664035View attachment 1664036View attachment 1664037

Okay. Let’s do this.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how to write this. I’ve been grappling quite a bit with the idea of not
fitting the “demographic” of Ryan Haywood’s various victims. I’m older, first of all. I’m 32. And
secondly- I’m married.
Since all of this has started coming out, I’ve had this fear. I’m older. I should have understood. I
should have known what was happening to me and I could have stopped it at any point.
Should’ve known better. Could’ve said no. Shouldn’t have been starstruck by- honestly- a D List
Internet Celebrity, at best.
I was 30 in November of 2018. I’d been struggling to come to terms with the idea of being
polyamorous. My husband and I had made a few cracks about finding another girlfriend but I
was afraid to label myself as polyam for a long, long time. I found out later that Ryan had
mentioned to someone else that I was in an “open relationship” which was not entirely the case.
Maybe that was on me. Maybe I hadn’t been clear that November when we spent an entire
weekend talking nonstop and I confided in him that I was struggling to figure out how to apply
that term to myself and came out to him about it. I’d mentioned I hadn’t even been comfortable
using it when speaking to my husband at that point, so I think that may have been a catalyst for
him to mention his personal marital problems.
If you’ve read any of the other stories, you probably know what he told me. I don’t think I need to
elaborate any more on how he blamed his flirtatiousness, or forwardness, on his wife’s reluctant
intimacy. It just feels wrong to keep talking about that. So I would like to clarify something at this
moment: I did not assume Ryan’s relationship itself was open. I...had foolishly hoped that it was.
When you yourself are a certain type of person, you selfishly hope that others are as well. I
never asked because I was afraid to and only found out for sure that it wasn’t later on. We
talked about him and his wife possibly going to therapy. I tried to give advice as far as him
sitting down with her and having a real discussion about their lack of intimacy. This man that I
looked up to, that I admired, felt trapped and wanted intimacy. I felt bad for him.
I know now that was what he wanted me to feel.
We spent the whole weekend after Thanksgiving chatting. He told me I could tell him to stop
flirting if I was not comfortable with it. I told him it was fine. I felt weird since I had yet to discuss
this with my husband but this was new and exciting and I liked Ryan. I thought we were going to
be friends.
Obviously we were never going to be friends. He called me his friend. Four months ago, when I
approached him about where we stood, what kind of a relationship we could even call it, he said
we were friends. I brought this up to him as recently as last weekend when he claimed that “no
one told me how they felt.” I did. I did many times. And I think others did too. He never wanted
to hear any of us until we started speaking out.
We flirted pretty heavily throughout the end of the year. I asked if I was the only girl at the time,
and he said that while he’d done this with other girls, yes, I was currently the only one. He didn’t
have the “capacity” to flirt with multiple girls at once. But I was beginning to feel pretty fucking
horrible about it come December. I expressed this to him multiple times- the guilt and shame I
could feel starting to build up over it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. He tried so hard to
keep us all alone and in the dark. Even in some of my darkest moments, he said he hoped that
no matter what happened, I could keep this quiet.
I asked him once if he thought I was a bad person. He said not any more bad than he was. At
the time, I felt comforted by it. Now, it fucking hurts like hell. I thought I was helping this person I
trusted find an outlet for something he needed and wasn’t getting. And it was addictive, and fun,
even when I had my doubts.
Let’s get a more concise timeline going.
November 2018 is when this started to spiral. The photos, some that were tame, some of him
shirtless (still tame, but with more intent). The flirting.
December 2018 I had very serious thoughts about committing suicide. I was keeping this deep,
dark secret from so many people I loved. I had heard rumors that someone was spreading
about one of the other girls, approached him about it, and he lied. Not for the first time and
absolutely not for the last time. I found out for certain later that month that I was not the only girl
he was fucking around with and had a breakdown. But I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
January 2019 he offered to fly me out to Austin to have sex. I finally talked to my husband about
it. He said I could do it. I had sorted my end out- I tried to separate my issues from Ryan’s.
February 2019 I went on my trip. He came to my hotel a couple times. We’d have sex, hang out
a bit, and then he’d leave. Once I’d returned from my trip, he ghosted me. It was 2-3 weeks of
radio silence. I felt horrible and disgusting. What had happened that suddenly I was no longer
worth talking to? Weren’t we friends? This person had given me confidence in myself, had given
me the attention that I’d craved from someone just like him, and then had the gall to rip it out of
my hands? I started going to therapy. I lost myself somewhere along the way, lost pieces of
myself to Ryan, and I needed some semblance of stability.
March 2019 we started talking again, more sporadically than before. I started planning a trip to
Austin in May for my birthday. I was learning to be okay with the breaks in communication. It
had gone from daily to weekly in 4 months but I would take what I could get.
May 2019 I went back to Austin. We’d discussed the possibility of meeting up. He’d just had a
loss in his family so the timing was bad; it was up in the air. He worked it out eventually and
came over after work one day.
Skip to July 2019. He had a hotel for RTX and I went over there one night. Same as before- had
sex, hung out, left. I have some photos but they’re not very incriminating and I know they will get
questioned. One is of me in the hotel room with his bag behind me and another is of his
nightstand with his wedding band and a pin that someone had given him that day on it.
There was more random communication between this. Whenever he felt like reaching out. It
sucked. I was desperate and needy. I wanted his attention. He didn’t want to give it. He was
tiring of me and wouldn’t admit it but I could feel it. I’d gained weight over this timeframe and felt
worse about myself than ever before. He’d gone from calling me beautiful to ignoring every
advance I made- and I did make them, I wanted to feel special again- and telling me he wasn’t
flirting with anyone and hadn’t been for a while (an excuse that ran its face into the wall over
and over again in 2020 too).
October 2019 was the last time I saw him. I was in town for ACL. I stayed with a friend for half
the time and got a hotel near his work for the rest of the trip. He came over once in the morning
and left almost right afterward. While he was there, I expressed to his face that I liked the
attention and hated that he felt like he could take it away. He said he was sorry. I knew he
wasn’t.
We sexted a bit during this whole time but not very much. Maybe a few times. Everything was
consensual. I continued to poke and prod in 2020 with the desire for attention. I once again told
Ryan how he was making me feel and how much it hurt. He once again gave me a half-assed
apology and proceeded to tell me he didn’t like to get very deep on the “feelings” scale. I didn’t
want feelings. I wanted to be heard, as his “friend.”
I’d also approached him a few times about other girls I thought he may have been flirting with
and once again was lied to with the same excuses as before. He was slowing down in his old
age, according to him. Then we stopped talking for 3-4 months. Until all of this started. I reacted
to him with sympathy; I didn’t want his life to be ruined any more than my own. I’ve already
posted a few of those screenshots. I didn’t get harassed to the extent as the other girls did. But
he told me he’d just started learning about “power imbalances” which turned out to be a
bald-faced lie considering he’d told another girl long before this that he was aware there was a
power imbalance between them. He has previously also suggested that just because I am older
than the other girls, I knew what I was getting into, insinuating that I did not really need any
apologies from him for him taking advantage of his power over me as someone who admired
him.
Nonetheless, there will likely never be a point where I am not sorry for my part in this. He is at
fault but I will never, ever not be sorry. I’m sorry to Achievement Hunter, who I love, and loved
volunteering for, and my team there that I feel like I betrayed. I’m sorry to this community, that
has given me everything. I’m sorry to my friends, many of whom had to keep secrets for me for
years. I’m sorry to a family that is now in pieces. I’m sorry to my husband, for getting caught up
in the excitement of something, and forgoing details.
I’m not fucking sorry to Ryan Haywood. I’m not sorry to the man that told lie on top of lie on top
of lie. I’m not fucking sorry to the monster that brushed me aside when he was tired of me and
made me look, and feel, desperate, and needy. I’m not sorry to this desperate animal that hurt
so many girls and then dared to tell them not to tell their fucking stories.
“Not any more bad a person than I am.” I’m a thousand fucking times better than you could ever
hope to be. And stronger every day.


Reminder Ryan was supposedly in this woman's DM's the other day asking "where she was on the hate meter" and fishing for sympathy, even though apparently they hadn't talked for 3-4 months before this mess:

can't tell if this is an existing person or a new one. but goddamn ryan why waste time on this shit when you should be lining your laywer's pockets as much as possible

edit; i can't read for shit, the DMs are from friday, this was obviously before shit exploded. still unsure if it's an existing chick or new one.

https://archive.vn/jDyYi
https://tw.tinf.io/mjmills_/status/1316007002427006977
View attachment 1658970View attachment 1658973
View attachment 1658974 View attachment 1658975


Also

1602775230134.png


Perhaps a poor choice of words.
 

doesitmatter?

kiwifarms.net

NEW ACCUSER ALERT! Victim #8 comes forward with receipts. Warning, extremely long spoiler.
View attachment 1664035View attachment 1664036View attachment 1664037

Okay. Let’s do this.
I’ve been thinking a lot about how to write this. I’ve been grappling quite a bit with the idea of not
fitting the “demographic” of Ryan Haywood’s various victims. I’m older, first of all. I’m 32. And
secondly- I’m married.
Since all of this has started coming out, I’ve had this fear. I’m older. I should have understood. I
should have known what was happening to me and I could have stopped it at any point.
Should’ve known better. Could’ve said no. Shouldn’t have been starstruck by- honestly- a D List
Internet Celebrity, at best.
I was 30 in November of 2018. I’d been struggling to come to terms with the idea of being
polyamorous. My husband and I had made a few cracks about finding another girlfriend but I
was afraid to label myself as polyam for a long, long time. I found out later that Ryan had
mentioned to someone else that I was in an “open relationship” which was not entirely the case.
Maybe that was on me. Maybe I hadn’t been clear that November when we spent an entire
weekend talking nonstop and I confided in him that I was struggling to figure out how to apply
that term to myself and came out to him about it. I’d mentioned I hadn’t even been comfortable
using it when speaking to my husband at that point, so I think that may have been a catalyst for
him to mention his personal marital problems.
If you’ve read any of the other stories, you probably know what he told me. I don’t think I need to
elaborate any more on how he blamed his flirtatiousness, or forwardness, on his wife’s reluctant
intimacy. It just feels wrong to keep talking about that. So I would like to clarify something at this
moment: I did not assume Ryan’s relationship itself was open. I...had foolishly hoped that it was.
When you yourself are a certain type of person, you selfishly hope that others are as well. I
never asked because I was afraid to and only found out for sure that it wasn’t later on. We
talked about him and his wife possibly going to therapy. I tried to give advice as far as him
sitting down with her and having a real discussion about their lack of intimacy. This man that I
looked up to, that I admired, felt trapped and wanted intimacy. I felt bad for him.
I know now that was what he wanted me to feel.
We spent the whole weekend after Thanksgiving chatting. He told me I could tell him to stop
flirting if I was not comfortable with it. I told him it was fine. I felt weird since I had yet to discuss
this with my husband but this was new and exciting and I liked Ryan. I thought we were going to
be friends.
Obviously we were never going to be friends. He called me his friend. Four months ago, when I
approached him about where we stood, what kind of a relationship we could even call it, he said
we were friends. I brought this up to him as recently as last weekend when he claimed that “no
one told me how they felt.” I did. I did many times. And I think others did too. He never wanted
to hear any of us until we started speaking out.
We flirted pretty heavily throughout the end of the year. I asked if I was the only girl at the time,
and he said that while he’d done this with other girls, yes, I was currently the only one. He didn’t
have the “capacity” to flirt with multiple girls at once. But I was beginning to feel pretty fucking
horrible about it come December. I expressed this to him multiple times- the guilt and shame I
could feel starting to build up over it. I didn’t have anyone to talk to about it. He tried so hard to
keep us all alone and in the dark. Even in some of my darkest moments, he said he hoped that
no matter what happened, I could keep this quiet.
I asked him once if he thought I was a bad person. He said not any more bad than he was. At
the time, I felt comforted by it. Now, it fucking hurts like hell. I thought I was helping this person I
trusted find an outlet for something he needed and wasn’t getting. And it was addictive, and fun,
even when I had my doubts.
Let’s get a more concise timeline going.
November 2018 is when this started to spiral. The photos, some that were tame, some of him
shirtless (still tame, but with more intent). The flirting.
December 2018 I had very serious thoughts about committing suicide. I was keeping this deep,
dark secret from so many people I loved. I had heard rumors that someone was spreading
about one of the other girls, approached him about it, and he lied. Not for the first time and
absolutely not for the last time. I found out for certain later that month that I was not the only girl
he was fucking around with and had a breakdown. But I didn’t feel so alone anymore.
January 2019 he offered to fly me out to Austin to have sex. I finally talked to my husband about
it. He said I could do it. I had sorted my end out- I tried to separate my issues from Ryan’s.
February 2019 I went on my trip. He came to my hotel a couple times. We’d have sex, hang out
a bit, and then he’d leave. Once I’d returned from my trip, he ghosted me. It was 2-3 weeks of
radio silence. I felt horrible and disgusting. What had happened that suddenly I was no longer
worth talking to? Weren’t we friends? This person had given me confidence in myself, had given
me the attention that I’d craved from someone just like him, and then had the gall to rip it out of
my hands? I started going to therapy. I lost myself somewhere along the way, lost pieces of
myself to Ryan, and I needed some semblance of stability.
March 2019 we started talking again, more sporadically than before. I started planning a trip to
Austin in May for my birthday. I was learning to be okay with the breaks in communication. It
had gone from daily to weekly in 4 months but I would take what I could get.
May 2019 I went back to Austin. We’d discussed the possibility of meeting up. He’d just had a
loss in his family so the timing was bad; it was up in the air. He worked it out eventually and
came over after work one day.
Skip to July 2019. He had a hotel for RTX and I went over there one night. Same as before- had
sex, hung out, left. I have some photos but they’re not very incriminating and I know they will get
questioned. One is of me in the hotel room with his bag behind me and another is of his
nightstand with his wedding band and a pin that someone had given him that day on it.
There was more random communication between this. Whenever he felt like reaching out. It
sucked. I was desperate and needy. I wanted his attention. He didn’t want to give it. He was
tiring of me and wouldn’t admit it but I could feel it. I’d gained weight over this timeframe and felt
worse about myself than ever before. He’d gone from calling me beautiful to ignoring every
advance I made- and I did make them, I wanted to feel special again- and telling me he wasn’t
flirting with anyone and hadn’t been for a while (an excuse that ran its face into the wall over
and over again in 2020 too).
October 2019 was the last time I saw him. I was in town for ACL. I stayed with a friend for half
the time and got a hotel near his work for the rest of the trip. He came over once in the morning
and left almost right afterward. While he was there, I expressed to his face that I liked the
attention and hated that he felt like he could take it away. He said he was sorry. I knew he
wasn’t.
We sexted a bit during this whole time but not very much. Maybe a few times. Everything was
consensual. I continued to poke and prod in 2020 with the desire for attention. I once again told
Ryan how he was making me feel and how much it hurt. He once again gave me a half-assed
apology and proceeded to tell me he didn’t like to get very deep on the “feelings” scale. I didn’t
want feelings. I wanted to be heard, as his “friend.”
I’d also approached him a few times about other girls I thought he may have been flirting with
and once again was lied to with the same excuses as before. He was slowing down in his old
age, according to him. Then we stopped talking for 3-4 months. Until all of this started. I reacted
to him with sympathy; I didn’t want his life to be ruined any more than my own. I’ve already
posted a few of those screenshots. I didn’t get harassed to the extent as the other girls did. But
he told me he’d just started learning about “power imbalances” which turned out to be a
bald-faced lie considering he’d told another girl long before this that he was aware there was a
power imbalance between them. He has previously also suggested that just because I am older
than the other girls, I knew what I was getting into, insinuating that I did not really need any
apologies from him for him taking advantage of his power over me as someone who admired
him.
Nonetheless, there will likely never be a point where I am not sorry for my part in this. He is at
fault but I will never, ever not be sorry. I’m sorry to Achievement Hunter, who I love, and loved
volunteering for, and my team there that I feel like I betrayed. I’m sorry to this community, that
has given me everything. I’m sorry to my friends, many of whom had to keep secrets for me for
years. I’m sorry to a family that is now in pieces. I’m sorry to my husband, for getting caught up
in the excitement of something, and forgoing details.
I’m not fucking sorry to Ryan Haywood. I’m not sorry to the man that told lie on top of lie on top
of lie. I’m not fucking sorry to the monster that brushed me aside when he was tired of me and
made me look, and feel, desperate, and needy. I’m not sorry to this desperate animal that hurt
so many girls and then dared to tell them not to tell their fucking stories.
“Not any more bad a person than I am.” I’m a thousand fucking times better than you could ever
hope to be. And stronger every day.
Not to be an insensitive dick, but these women need a good therapist not dick. Ryan is a monster and a dumb ass we all know, but these girls will just blame all of their failings on Ryan at this point. He is now their scapegoat. "Could it be that i might be a shitty person for sleeping with a married man and flirting behind my husband's back? No it was Ryan Haywood's fault! He victimized me!" Even moving forward i guarantee they will milk the situation in order to avoid actually working on themselves.
 

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