Amberlynn Engagagement and Wedding Planning Megathread 1/14/2021 - For all pre-wedding wedding talk

Meygen

I've eaten all my feelings for the day
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Ah.. Lest we forget.
 

Clotso Coof

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Amber wouldn't be the first person to get engaged to for attention with no intention of actually going through with the wedding. I'll believe it when the actual wedding day arrives and she hasn't come up with an excuse to call it off.
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What is going on with her hand? Is it slathered in foundation to try (and fail) to cover up her beetus knuckles? Is her skin just that dry? Something about this looks more "off" than usual.

Also, gorls, please stop posting phone screenshots as full size images. Insert them as thumbnails instead. Other people in other threads are getting temp bans for this, and I'd hate to see anyone miss out on this trashfire.

Hamber used her face foundation on her hand to try to cover her beetus knuckles, but the shade is wrong for her hand and makes her look jaundiced. Also, she failed at covering up the dark beetus knuckles anyway. What a dumb bitch.

Where did they find a women's ring that fit around her huge finger? Walmart website only goes up to ring size 10. Hamber's finger has got to be twice that circumference.
 

idosometimes

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This whole thing must be a relief for Becky. She has spent the last few years keeping herself pretty and watching what she eats. Marriage means she can let herself go.

It will be funny, if marriage happens and lardarse does not die, when they breakup and go to court fighting over how many ill-fitting child's shirts Becky will get a month in support.
 

alpro whore

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jesus. i wonder if becky looks back on this picture and realises how she went from a somewhat normal, albeit fat woman, to being somewhere in the region of 300-400lbs, dressing like an autistic 10 year old boy and being butler/ass-wiper/24hr round the clock carer to a 600lb narc, who's now her fiance.

it would be somewhat tragic if becky didn't choose this lifestyle with amber, knowing exactly where she would end up. i'm not surprised norma hated amber after she watched her daughter ruin her life with her.

aside from that, i hope the engagement saga is as trashy as we all expect it to be. i have my money on a quick scoot down to the registry office, and then the function being in some hired marquee on the nearest piece of grass to their apartment as possible. the fag shanty had a good patch of land out the front, i'm not sure about their current place seeing as they never go outside.
 

SituationTypeThing

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Catholics do that too. At least where I am from. But I don't think Becky or Amber are Catholics.

Of course Amber has to be the girliest bride in the whole Universe because she is such a dainty, girly girl.

But what I wanna know is, are Dana and Misty going to be bridesmaids? And who is going to give Amber away?
Her mother already gave her away years ago. Maybe she can get the manager of her local cheesecake factory?

She said elsewhere that becky would be wearing a dress too, so I guess she'll also want to be given away, maybe by eric? How hilarious would it be if rickey was roped into giving amber away, when all he wants to do is throw her away!
 

WeDon'tNeedToWhisper

True & Honest Fan
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she's not kneeling, it's just her sitting on the edge of the couch and it sinks down. those are her thighs and ankles, her knees are buried in between

She's definitely sitting. You can see her toes
All right, I was about to die on this hill - trust me

But, upon further examination, dialing my autism to full power, it does appear she's sitting on the very edge of a couch. Or whatever. It does look like she's on her knees though!
 

draculasestateagent

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somebody on one of the FB groups shared this ( amber is sugarcane) big girl is salty she can’t make a clickbait video about it all and needs to be a raging cunt.
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She's probably salty she can't surprise everyone with a "IM ENGANGED|WEDDING CAKE EAT WITH ME" video. She's lost the element of surprise so she's sulking until she can monetise something we haven't seen. That's my guess anyway.
 

Situation Type Deal Gorl

Fuck your feelings, nancypants
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Most normal people who write their own vows do a shit job anyways so imagine what these two would do. I really hope this plays out now.

But Big Al is a poet! Poetry is her passion! I'm sure whatever she put to paper would be a vow that would garner worldwide respect as people acknowledged her superior ability to so perfectly encapsule the feelings that they could never voice.

she's not kneeling, it's just her sitting on the edge of the couch and it sinks down. those are her thighs and ankles, her knees are buried in between

FAT.

Imagine destroying relationships with 4 people you knew since high school and abandoning your dying Mother for...Amberlynn. :story: :story: :story:

The Big Grift was worth it, eh, Becky?

She's probably salty she can't surprise everyone with a "IM ENGANGED|WEDDING CAKE EAT WITH ME" video. She's lost the element of surprise so she's sulking until she can monetise something we haven't seen. That's my guess anyway.

You're getting a bit ahead of yourself. It's typical for people who engage a specialist baker to create something special to have a taste test of what the baker has come up with. I've no doubt that Big Al will spare no expense in having a baker come up with a delightful combination of form and taste.

Or, they'll pick up a sheet cake at Kroger and have the bakery write congrats or something on it.
 

Situation Type Deal Gorl

Fuck your feelings, nancypants
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Under 50 bucks on a ring. LOL
I imagine Amber's connections are thanking their lucky stars they're not Jewish & wanting a traditional Jewish wedding. I'm thinking about the part where the bride & groom get hoisted up on chairs & joyously bounced around.
Most of the "friends" they have wouldn't even be able to make it through the hora alone, never mind lifting them, without a bunch of EMTs on standby.
 

Slappy McGherkin

Bartender? Make that a double.
True & Honest Fan
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You're getting a bit ahead of yourself. It's typical for people who engage a specialist baker to create something special to have a taste test of what the baker has come up with. I've no doubt that Big Al will spare no expense in having a baker come up with a delightful combination of form and taste.

Is orange chicken REALLY that hard to re-recipe?
 
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