Amberlynn Poetry Night - verse and prose inspired by our gorl

[Moonpie]

Haiku

The elusive lover is gone.
Orange chicken and rice gobbled
Scooty puff barely scooting
In the Kroger fupa dragging.

 

[Situation Type Deal Gorl]

Once upon daytime bleary, while I vlogged, weak and teary
Over many a plaint and brushes and palettes galore --
While I plodded, ego snapping, suddenly there came a flapping
As of one gently whapping, whapping at my bedroom door.
"'Tis Becky with my food," I muttered, "whapping at my bedroom door--
Only this, and nothing more."

 

['tism take the wheel]

I heard a fly buzz when I died
The stillness of pillow mountain
was like the stillness of my scooty puff
in Kroger on the day before Thanksgiving

I willed my collection of makeup brushes and gel pens-away
what a charitable act
Giverlynn-they'll call me
then, there interposed a fly

he circled my empty Dove chocolate bar wrappers and soda cans
and then-my organs failed
I could not see to eat

I heard a fly buzz when I died
stillness formed me round
rounder than usual
rounder than ever before

**Snaps**Snaps**Snaps**Snaps**

 

[Death Grip]

A little haiku I composed, as there is beauty in brevity and sometimes less is more, something Amber Lynn will never grasp:

Gurl you are fat like the moon
Lose some weight you pig
Or you will be dead

Haiku traditionally follows a Five Seven Five syllable rendition but you can swap and change which order they go in. But they always consist of that number of syllables.

 

[L_I_F_T_E_D]

Finally found a good place to store this one:

The Reason (Is YouTube) - by Fupastank

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I hadn't done
But I continue bingeen
I never meant to weigh a quarter-tonne
And so I have to say before I die

That I just want you to know
I've found out what works for me
To make sure I'm always liveen
And the cycle begins anew
And the reason is YouTube

I'm sorry you don't like me
It's something I am vloggeen everyday
And all the mook-bongs I did for you
I wish that I could do them all again
And make you sit through every single ad

That's why I need you to watch
I'm steppeen onto my scale
Though haydurs will call me a whale
I'll pretend that I'm being true
And the reason is YouTube

And the reason is YouTube
And the reason is YouTube
And the reason is YouTube

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I hadn't done
And so I have to say before I die

That I just want you to know
I've found out what works for me
To make sure I'm always liveen
And the cycle begins anew

And the reason is YouTube

I'm certain I'll eat all the food
While I'm stabilizeen my mood
The reason for all that I do

And the reason is YouTube

For reference:

 

[Strine]

Here's an original...

ODE TO NECKY by Amber

I called your name, on tree trunk leeeeyggs
(My life-train's nearing its last station)
You came, and went to fry some aaeeeeeeygggs
(Due to the beetus type deal situation)

With nodding head, flesh beard and crooked jaw
You do agree my fast food to acquire
At happy times, I could forget your flaw:
You're not the fat sped dyke I still desire

Yet when at eventide I stir to wake
The lambent, amber hues of morning dusk
Do all the aspects of her tresses take,
And cheat her from my heart, now just a husk.