I'm drivin'! YEAH! RRRRMMM!
True & Honest Fan
So you are citing the golden rule as the universal moral principle everyone recognizes. While I do not agree entirely, I think this is a decent common ground to argue from.the universal moral principle evident to all is do NOT do to others what you dont want done to yourself.
If 2 people have wildly different views on how a breakup should be handled and what justifies it, these 2 people will have wildly differing views on what they would want "done" to them.
In this case, whose view is to be respected more?
Why is this a general rule? Why should others have to adhere to this merely because you feel this to be the case. If we are sticking to the golden rule as the universal moral source, and someone does not require or wish for any or all these things for themselves during a breakup, why should they provide this? I have been in a few relationships, all of which were enjoyable, and I am still (quite close) friends with all of my former SOs except for one. None of the breakups have followed this pattern, nor would I wish for it to be so - if my SO insisted on the pattern you have outlined, as you do with your former SOs, why should I comply? After all, I do not expect it to be "done" to me, thus, why should I be expected to adhere to it? And if I shouldn't, why should the people involved with you?Correct way to dump a boyfriend or girlfriend is trying to work things out with the person first, and giving them ultimatums and requirements to give them a chance to either change themselves or to change their mind. And it involves a post breakup discussion and evaluation of the pros and cons of the relationship.
Correct way to dump a spouse is only if they did something to deserve it
You, yes. Not the case for everyone. Does your application of the golden rule override the application of others (say, the other person involved in your friendship)? If so, why?Would I want someone to refuse to give up on former friendship they had with me? Yes I would.
For example - I don't want people to go to lengths to salvage a friendship if it has been damaged. I happen to be someone who does not mind severing ties and as such, I do not mind if someone feels it necessary to sever ties with me. This is perfectly acceptable and as such, I will not pursue those that give up on a friendship, regardless of how they come to this decision. This is me applying the golden rule from my POV. Yours differs wildly of course - but why should your POV of the golden rule take precedence if the other party happens to, for example, feel as I do?
On a side note:
Bloody hell you're still not over her are you?