Article Reviews -

LOLlolcow

touch of the 'tism
kiwifarms.net
Good job, @ULTIMATEPRIMETIME.

@Null, what would be an alternative to using {{quote}}?
I'm trying to set up some form of a writing gallery on the Church page, and it's not working all that well. I'm using {{quotebox|}} at the moment.
 

Null

Ooperator
kiwifarms.net
Likewise, the TJChuch article by @LOLlolcow is pretty good. I went through it and edited the following:

1. Convert forum links to templates.
[http://kiwifarms.net/threads/article-reviews.6094/#post-421855 a thread]
{{kiwi|threads/article-reviews.6094/#post-421855|a thread}}

2. Converted archive.md links to templates.
[http://archive.md/letters an article]
{{archive|letters}}

3. Tidied punctuation and citations in sentence structures.

"Periods and citations go outside of quotes.<ref></ref>"
"Periods and citations go outside of quotes".<ref></ref>


@Null, what would be an alternative to using {{quote}}?
Good question. I see you're also using quotes, but as Quoteboxes. This is definitely a high-priority thing to address, because there's rarely something better than letting content speak for itself. I will see this tomorrow.
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I've done ten shitloads to clean-up, re-write, edit, and re-write the Vade article again to be less spergy, less confrontational, and more informative. I've added tons of images, a buttload of new information as it's become available, and so on. I do, however, have one weakness, and that's where I need help.

I am apocalyptically bad at citations. I'm working on this, but advice would be appreciated.
 

LOLlolcow

touch of the 'tism
kiwifarms.net
@Jaimas, I notice that you have all of your external links as plain hyperlinks without adding them to a references section with <ref> tags. I'd probably use some <ref> tags, because they're more organized that way, and that's what the other articles are using.

I think some of the psychological analysis could be either truncated or put in quote notation (for the professional parts,) but that depends on how Null decides to display quotes.

I've done ten shitloads to clean-up, re-write, edit, and re-write the Vade article again to be less spergy, less confrontational, and more informative.
And you've done a good job. I could never write an article that large on a lolcow..at least not while keeping the last shreds of my sanity...:lol:
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
@Jaimas, I notice that you have all of your external links as plain hyperlinks without adding them to a references section with <ref> tags. I'd probably use some <ref> tags, because they're more organized that way, and that's what the other articles are using.

I think some of the psychological analysis could be either truncated or put in quote notation (for the professional parts,) but that depends on how Null decides to display quotes.


And you've done a good job. I could never write an article that large on a lolcow..at least not while keeping the last shreds of my sanity...:lol:
I welcome any assistance on this matter. And appreciate the input, LOLlolcow.
 

DeagleDad420

kiwifarms.net
Going to edit it now, here's some pointers.
  • Videos and infoboxes are way too fucking big. It makes the page look real bad. Wrap them around the text better. Look at my Tyce Andrews article for an example of how to wrap video/pics/infoboxes around text. You always want to avoid big chunks of whitespace.
  • Gamerfood didn't dox him, Hats from myg0t did. I have told you this many times before, and I know by now that you don't care, but please refrain from writing or speaking about the internal politics of trolling groups when you don't know anything about them. It evokes the image of a white suburban mom casually namedropping "Snoop Doggy Dogg" while driving her son to school in her Ford Escort despite the fact that Snoop Dogg is 40 years old and her son has no idea who he even is. It just makes certain people cringe.
  • Needs a better opening line that makes it more obvious why he even warrants a page on the Wiki in the first place. I mean, basically it seems to me that this guy isn't entertaining or noteworthy (he's not, frankly, relevant anymore to anything atm besides fringe drama) and after having read the entire article, I found myself asking, "who cares"? This is a good thing because it's very accurate, but we need to make it more clear at the very start, in order to better respect the reader's time.
Suggestion for opening line:
Richard Heinz, better known as PvtRichardCranium, is a former member of [[Team Gamerfood]] who momentarily and poorly attempted to troll [[Jace Connors]] in late 2013. While his performance was initially met with approval, this declined until he was eventually doxed and ousted from the trolling community. Having stepped back from events surrounding [[Jace Connors]], he is rarely active anymore."
This sums up all the main points very succinctly and I would say pretty objectively. I don't think anyone would really disagree with this depiction of events. The good thing about this is that, after reading these 3 sentences, you immediately know whether or not you want to read the rest of the article or not.

Other than that I see nothing wrong with it, otherwise it's nicely succinct and I like that you broke up the events involving him into neat paragraphs. Nice work with that.
 

Null

Ooperator
kiwifarms.net
Yeah, agreed. I like your edits.

What I don't like is the presentation of the videos and I feel this is a common flaw of the wiki in general. I need to look up how other sites display video media and steal their templates.
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Vade project is continuing as planned, with citations and everything, but a minor issue has reared its head, and I'd like to discuss it briefly:

Say we have a lolcow, and we discover, during our chronicling of their behavior, that they've been involved in actions that are especially abhorrent, even by the standards of other lolcows. Let's call this The Nick Bate Singularity, where one hypothetically learns, for the sake of argument, that said lolcow is a sick fuck. Now, naturally, as Null has said, the best thing to do is to simply report it and move on; the truth is about as biased as it needs to be, and any statement of a lolcow being a sick fuck will thusly be self-evident via the reporting. But what if a Lolcow Wiki chronicleer can't? Do we then propose someone else to work on the article? Do we nudge them back in the right direction? Do we simply scrub it and try again?
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
In journalism this is called recusing oneself. If you literally cannot maintain a NPOV, you need to not write the article. Exact same standard we use for posting. If you can't post without raging, do not post.
Perfectly reasonable. And well-said.
 

The I Scream Man

The Dogge Abides
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Perfectly reasonable. And well-said.
Just so we're all on the same page here, are we going to have a conversation regarding this? I imagine we'd want to develop some kind of guideline beyond using "this gives me prickly-wicklies" as a rule...not to imply that your reasoning isn't sound Jaimas, merely that I think we might be able to flesh this out a little bit beyond where we've taken it, because it's going to vary from person to person.

Edit: to elaborate a little further, what I mean is we're taking on a big responsibility here, because in effect we might be either the only or one of a handful of non-biased objective reporters about certain events and the Cow phenomenon. A lot of people are going to be using our work as a primary source. That being said, I personally think we should consider having a conversation about this because our current crop of Internet shitheads might not be as tame as the cows we find next year or the year after.
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Just so we're all on the same page here, are we going to have a conversation regarding this? I imagine we'd want to develop some kind of guideline beyond using "this gives me prickly-wicklies" as a rule...not to imply that your reasoning isn't sound Jaimas, merely that I think we might be able to flesh this out a little bit beyond where we've taken it, because it's going to vary from person to person.

Edit: to elaborate a little further, what I mean is we're taking on a big responsibility here, because in effect we might be either the only or one of a handful of non-biased objective reporters about certain events and the Cow phenomenon. A lot of people are going to be using our work as a primary source. That being said, I personally think we should consider having a conversation about this because our current crop of Internet shitheads might not be as tame as the cows we find next year or the year after.

Honestly, there isn't that much to discuss, my dear fluffy dog. After the likes of Deeker or Nick Bate, there isn't really any further south to go, so that's not the issue. I brought it up solely because of the possibility that a lolcow we might look into might turn out to have some horror lurking beneath that could potentially cause an editor to go full A-Log - take for example, in investigating lolcow X, editor Y learns that lolcow X molests children - but Null pretty much assuaged my concerns. I suspect that if there's too much trouble someone has with NPOV, the other Kiwi Editors will damned well let their associate know about it.
 

The I Scream Man

The Dogge Abides
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Honestly, there isn't that much to discuss, my dear fluffy dog. After the likes of Deeker or Nick Bate, there isn't really any further south to go, so that's not the issue. I brought it up solely because of the possibility that a lolcow we might look into might turn out to have some horror lurking beneath that could potentially cause an editor to go full A-Log - take for example, in investigating lolcow X, editor Y learns that lolcow X molests children - but Null pretty much assuaged my concerns. I suspect that if there's too much trouble someone has with NPOV, the other Kiwi Editors will damned well let their associate know about it.
Ahhhh I understand, sorry I was having a moment I guess. I thought you already had encountered said feels, my mistake. But yeah I agree, if it isn't Deeker or Sick Nick or, I don't know, maybe some of them incel guys? Then we don't have much farther down to go, do we? :lol: I really admire our dedication to maintaining neutrality, to be honest. It means I don't have to try to be funny, which as I've said before doesn't work because the lulz must come about organically, or they're not really funny.
 

ULTIMATEPRIMETIME

my dream is an internet without women
kiwifarms.net
So now that finals are well out of the way, I decided to create wiki pages for every Tiberius Rising chapter for us to cite from and stuff. I made an article for Chapter 1 to test this out, and after some constructive criticism I will make the rest in the same format.
 

Null

Ooperator
kiwifarms.net
I'll make some changes in a moment. This is the first article about literature we have so it's a good testing ground.
 

Null

Ooperator
kiwifarms.net
So now that finals are well out of the way, I decided to create wiki pages for every Tiberius Rising chapter for us to cite from and stuff. I made an article for Chapter 1 to test this out, and after some constructive criticism I will make the rest in the same format.
I really like your tone in the article. I also noticed you used a Tiberius Rising category in the ps-jace template, which was extremely appropriate.

Some changes made:
1. I added a template for quoting written resources.
2. Tiberius Rising was uploaded as a PDF. I've also enabled PDF uploads.
3. Merged Trivia and Criticism into a Criticisms area. Trivia categories are really poor style, as that information should be woven into the actual article. The trivia was literally nothing but pointing out / criticizing errors anyways.
4. I mentioned FaN, who does deserve his own article for his critiques and their affect on Jace.

I haven't touched the summary, however, and I feel the leading paragraph is very weak. There's no synopsis or anything for people who don't want to parse the actual writing.
 

Jaimas

HUP HUP HUP HUP
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Anyone object to me handling the Article on Tumblr when time allows?
 
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