Babies

[FluffyTehFennekin]

There’s just something about babies that fascinates people. Why are they so cute, yet why are they gross at the same time. Why do people want one, yet at the same time, not want one. Why don’t we remember being babies. So many questions not enough answers.

 

[The Sauce Boss]

pedophile spotted.

 

[FluffyTehFennekin]

pedophile spotted.

hey, take it easy, I’m not THAT into children.

 

[Μusk]

All of those questions have answers, you just didn't bother spending any time actually thinking about it.

 

[The Sauce Boss]

Serious answer: animal instinct. We're hard-wired on the genetic level to want to procreate and bear offspring, even if the instinct is a bit watered down in some folk.

 

[MemeGrey]

Its only gross when its other peoples babies, most parents could be supee squeamish pre baby and as soon as its born they're comfortable being elbow deep in poop and vomit

 

[LargeChoonger]

How long until this thread turns into spot the 38 year old white woman who's had 3 abortions and can't figure out why she's depressed

 

[felix el gato]

I used to be a teachers aide, that made me never want to have kids. A fellow coworker once told me, after I rejected her offer to go to the bar after work that she, “never liked drinking or getting drunk” until she became a teacher. My first day there a kid bit another kids penis.

 

[Monika H.]

Hell if I know.
I never liked children overall, not hate them but never liked them. Always thought they talk too much and are too entitled and spoiled.
That said, I can't wait for my daughter to be there and she'll be probably the only child I'll be fond of. All other children don't concern me.

 

[Saw the tables of tyranny]

I hate the idea of being responsible for and having to take care of a living thing as fragile as a baby human. On top of being responsible for this things well being, you are also responsible for what this thing does until it’s 18 years old. Yeah, no thank you.

 

[heathercho]

Always remember that babies are just small humans.
Some will be good, others will be your enemy. Treat them accordingly. Especially if they're a bald or ugly baby.

 

[Diabeetus]

Babies are fucking stupid. They can't walk, they can't file taxes, they don't go to school, they do nothing productive. They can't even speak properly. "Goo goo gaga, blah blah." Shut the fuck up. They make no attempt to integrate themselves into our society. Babies are nothing but leeches. I have no idea why we don't have a "Babies / Infants / Newborns" thread in Community Watch, because every baby is a lolcow.

 

[Monika H.]

Always remember that babies are just small humans.
Some will be good, others will be your enemy. Treat them accordingly. Especially if they're a bald or ugly baby.

and if they are fat

 

[The Fool]

Don't know about you, but for me, nothing beats a hearty bowl of Chinese Fetus Soup.

 

[UntimelyDhelmise]

There's something about human babies that mystifies me. In nature, it's a common (but not hard-fast) rule that the longer a creature incubates, the more capable it is at birth. Yet here humans are with a roughly 9 month gestation period and our offspring are 100% helpless for at least a couple years before they can do the slightest amount of helping themselves to anything. I mean fuck, the little spawns take a few months before they can even simply rotate themselves.

 

[Gravityqueen4life]

from what i have heard from parents i know its "you understand once you get your own child" so, i guess its a feeling i will never fully understand since i dont see myself having kids. i guess the hopes of them growing into a spiting image of yourselves but better and hopes they take care of you when you get old is appealing.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

A baby is like the game that people tell you that you need to spend 50 hours before it gets good.

 

[kūhaku]

A baby is like the game that people tell you that you need to spend 50 hours before it gets good.

Trust me, one piece gets better after episode 900.

 

[TFT-A9]

fuck babies tbh

(not like that you fucking pedo)

 

[Jones McCann]

There's something about human babies that mystifies me. In nature, it's a common (but not hard-fast) rule that the longer a creature incubates, the more capable it is at birth. Yet here humans are with a roughly 9 month gestation period and our offspring are 100% helpless for at least a couple years before they can do the slightest amount of helping themselves to anything. I mean fuck, the little spawns take a few months before they can even simply rotate themselves.

Definitely has something to do with humans having arms and fingers; we can carry children around so it makes more sense for them to be helpless at first then running around after birth. You would never see a newborn sea creature being unable to swim unless it can be carried around, otherwise it would die. A lot of other creatures can walk within hours after birth, you'll notice those animals don't have any way of carrying their offspring. Kangaroo's take 6 months until they can start walking around, they're carried around in their mothers pouch. I believe it's somewhat of an evolutionary trade-off between the mother being pregnant and the child being helpless. A mother carrying a child is much more capable than a pregnant one, they're able to move around much better with the baby in their hands/pouch.