Bad Writing Advice -

Elwood P. Dowd

Gone Daddy Gone
I wonder if he's ever made anything and how it holds up, honestly. I always laugh when I see a critic fail to measure up to their own standards.
This is why I don't get why people sperg about Hello Future Me's channel. Every video works ATLA into it somehow, he's never written a work of fiction I've heard of and he has some of the oddest takes (Pretty sure he's the one who claims to be a huge Star Trek fan, but has never watched TOS.)

Doubt he gives a fuck what I think, since's the one with a YouTube channel and 600K+ subscribers, but I just don't get it.

Chewy Suarez

Kids eat free on Mondays!
When writing a female character, make sure she gets less time to develop compared to her male counterparts, and even when she’s part of a bloodline with abilities that rival even some of the most skilled members in the ensemble, do absolutely nothing to expand on those powers just so she doesn’t threaten what you’ve established with your male characters. However, if you do show her as a powerful force, make sure it’s only once in a while and not as common as with male characters.

When it comes to writing their goals and ambitions, it’s about men and men only. Their only purpose in the story is to either be under their male counterparts or to please men. When two girls interact, it has to be about competing for a boy that they like or about boys and romance. Avoid writing a female character around something that isn’t a male love interest. Better yet, you can write a female character who doesn’t give a shit about boys, but give more screentime to a swing set instead.

I’m looking at you, Kishimoto.

Krokodil Overdose

Make the villains multidimensional characters. And have random bystanders, absolutely everyone who isn't one hundred percent pretty and isn't written from a POV perspective a drooling imbecile or a piece o' shit. Remember: the real villains in the story are the demented, belligerent masses. Go out of your way to exact vindictive punishment on undeveloped characters. Make the laws of the universe bend towards their torment. Have objective metaphysical systems that judge whether a person is good or evil and really drive it in how Mr. Rude Merchant is so evil for making a character cry that the villains who literally burned an entire village down last panel are in the right to torture him.
Hi, Mr. Spielberg, welcome to the farms.
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Ģιίττεર ƣƲεεɴ
Type Like This

Have Paragraphs Seperated Differently
Do Not Use Commas

In Fact Only Use Ellipses...................FOLLOWED BY ALL CAPITALS AND MANY EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!

The More You Have The More Intense Your Scene Or Dialogues Will Be!!!!!!!!

Insert Author's Notes To Reinforce Your Writing

Author's Note....................THE ABOVE TIP IS A GREAT IDEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Most Importantly End Your Book On A..............THEN NEVER ACKNOWLEDGE IT AGAIN!!!!!!
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Doctor Placebo

Western education is sin.
Remember, "strong character" is synonymous with "massive belligerent asshole." This is especially true for female characters. You don't want your female characters to be dainty damsels in distress, so compensate by making sure they're always rude, mean, and abrasive to every male character who helps them. If they're in a position of authority, have them expect to be obeyed blindly and without question while doing nothing to win the trust of the people under them. If they aren't in a position of authority, have them always distrust and disobey anyone in a position of authority, no matter how much that person helps them and proves trustworthy and decent. Always have them put their ego above their mission and other people. Have them show little or no remorse if their actions get people killed.

This is the key to writing good, strong female characters.

Pointless Pedant

Waiting in queue for 2b2t
True & Honest Fan
Fill your book entirely with orange man bad TDS screeching and references to current politics that will be quickly dated. Write all sympathetic characters as obese black people with a million genders each and all unsympathetic ones as straight white men twiddling their moustaches and sneering "I smirk at your pain!" at dying illegal immigrants. Have Central Americans say "Latinx" even though I've never heard anyone say that in my life. Have absolutely no regard for the laws of nature whatsoever, but claim reality has a liberal bias. Accuse anyone writing about anything they didn't personally experience of cultural appropriation. At no point give any sort of nuance or balance to any arguments, and have characters give lengthy, tiresome Atlas Shrugged style speeches on how straight white male patriarchy must be dismantled and replaced with a global Islamic caliphate.

The book How Not To Write A Novel from the 2000s is a good read for this.
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