Becoming A Mermaid - 8/12/2019 -

DuckSucker

Beautiful AND cute
kiwifarms.net
I mean "mermaid" is a funny way to say "blue whale" but I guess theyre both aquatic so youre close enough.

Since Ive been beaten to the very obvious joke, I wonder if she was trolling for that reaction?


She’s more like a manatee than a mermaid
I applaud you for taking it in a different direction. She had to fucking know. This thread is just a billion people trawling out that old joke.

(At least I can try to make a semi-related pun.)
 
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EvaBraunsGhost

I was like - whuuuuut???
kiwifarms.net
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Albert begs a piece of awkward glitter to 'don't make me look stooopid'


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'I'm so dumb' she says as she finally works out to use the damn applicator...

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TA-DA! Yea I'm not sure this is working...


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'I look like an actual kindergartener who got in like the art supplies and stuck it all over her face' -

You'll get no argument from me there Al...I think our gorl has finally lost the plot
 

Strawberry Pocky

If anybody needs me, I'll be in the Angry Dome.
kiwifarms.net
"And so we begin our quest: Did anyone in their right minds actually think that mermaids were spun into existence when lonely sailors saw manatees and mistook them for beautiful sirens of the sea? It depends on whether you think Christopher Columbus was in his right mind. Yup, it was old Chris C. that first claimed he spotted a mermaid that was, in fact, a lumbering manatee. In 1493, he was on his way to the New World (not that he knew it yet) when he saw a "female form" coming out of the water. To be fair, he did acknowledge they were a whole lot uglier than the stated lore"
- ALR-Mermaids


Manatees are really fucking big… with a fully grown female reaching up to like 4m in length and about 1500kg in weight. Because they are so goddamn large, they are rather slow and passive in nature. Distantly related to elephants but usually just referred to as “sea-cows."

TL;DR.......Amber is now fat AND glittery and I still would not have sex with her.
 

Nicotine Fetish

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
heheheh self deprecating jokes!!!!
guys I get it!!!
ahahah im a piece of shit!!!!
isn't that funny!!!!
*gulps down a large coke*
I'm monetizing and exploiting self harming myself on youtube but im aware of it and that makes it funny!
*thumbs up and wink to the camera*
...
oh, silly amber. Please just make your channel a mukbang channel already like you threatened.
 

Gorlax

Let’s go fill the internet with crime, come on!
kiwifarms.net
Mermaid? More like, uh...uh...a blobfish. Has that one been taken?

I genuinely can’t think of a type of video less entertaining than her makeup vids. Even her hauls are more interesting than this, good god. Once her leaky legs fuse together tho, she really will be a mermaid. Might as well start preparing for the future, I guess. They can move her into the pool!
 
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