Being a Bestiary of SJWs Most Foul and Wondrous

[Bloody bunny]

just an fyi guys, some of these guys are lying when they say they are in a open relationship,yes, Jim Sterling has had other people fuck his wife, but, that was because the farmer was lonely and did not know she was human.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

I reckon hbomberguy's a type 5. Is that accurate @Jaimas?

HBomberGuy is a Type 9 imo.

 

[TheImportantFart]

HBomberGuy is a Type 9 imo.

I think he's a mixture of the two tbh.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

I think he's a mixture of the two tbh.

HBomberGuy strikes me as purely Type 9.

 

[Jaimas]

Looking back on it, you're right. How about the others though?

I'll humor you this one last time but after that I'm putting a moratorium on these.

Spoiler: Batch #3

Kimchi Cuddles: Type 4. Mostly in it for personal enrichment and popularity points.

IDislikeCisPeople: Type 2, but in your defense on this one, @DirkBloodStormKing, this is a very hard SocJus Cow to diagnose; casual inspection lead one to argue she's a Type 1 (helped kickstart the cancer that is the Tucute movement on Tumblr) or Type 4 (DONATE TO ME SO I CAN PAY FOR DIABEETUS MEDS THAT I WILL INSTEAD SPEND ON VIDEO GAMES), but she finds her real ground in the Type 2s; she wants to be taken seriously, to wield the kind of personal power that comes with a cult of personality but she's a fucking laughingstock at the end of the day and now that she's admitted to being a filthy cis girl she'll never recoup her oppression points.

CommunismKills: Type 4. Solely engaged to get people to pay her to fuck off. She pays lip service to try to get oppressionbux. Anything else is just gravy.

Alison Rapp: Type 4 and literal whore. Shades of Type 2, but ultimately is in it solely for the money, power, and fame.

Jake Rapp: Type 7. Redeemed himself by fucking off.

Springtrapp: Type 9. Springtrapp is a rare case of a Social Justice Warrior whose reason for backing the cause is their own fucked-up fetish - in this case, her primary MO is fulfilling her shameless lust for underaged guro. Most SocJus nutters in this category back the cause out of contrition; Springtrapp does so as cover for her terrifying fucking fetishes, which she knows fall well outside the bounds of anything remotely resembling normalcy. By backing the cause, she hopes to find acceptance.

Straysheep: Type 4. Attention Whore. Clings to oppression for attention and acceptance. Started her own thread.

Genderbitch: Type 3. Wants to be IDCP, but isn't as charismatic. Let that sink in.

Cuteosphere: Type 9. Another of the SpringTrapp strain, which is hallmarked by their activism being a cover for their deviancy and not out of contrition like most Type 9s.

Moviebob: Textbook Type 1. Never shuts the fuck up about it. Unlike most Type 1s comes across as worse than the Nazis he complains about.

PurpleKecleon: Type 2. Another legitimately confusing one, but this one ultimately boils down to her use of her buddies as a personal army and her infamous tactics of trying to prove herself superior to others. A nasty piece of work and if she doesn't turn out later on to be a fucking pedophile, consider me fucking stunned.

Spoiler: Other Famed SocJus Cows

Jake Alley: Type 7 with shades of Type 3. Don't care that he claims to be trans. He isn't.

Mark Boyd: Type 4. Bask in awe of his $30 patreon take-home.

Nora Reed: Type 2. Easily the most spiteful, bitter, hateful Type 2 on this entire website.

David Gallant: Type 7. Cucked by other Type 7s.

Sarah Nyberg: Type 9. Springtrapp strain again; activism is to cover up deviancy.

Chris Kluwe: Type 7. Wants to be a Type 4. Isn't.

Brianna Wu: Type 1. Practically the trope namer of it.

Chloe Sagal: Type 3. I need explain nothing.

Randi Harper: Type 4. Left SocJus. Respect.

Laurelai Bailey: Type 9. Again, Springtrapp strain.

Zarna Joshi: Type 3. Completely and irretrievably insane.

Smugglypuff: Type 8. Duh.

I reckon hbomberguy's a type 5. Is that accurate @Jaimas?

HBomberguy is another one hard to classify. Has shades of 2, 4, 5, and 7. Ultimately he's 9 because his activism seems to be because of his own history of sexual misconduct.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Would it be fair to say that Greta of Trans Life Line is a Type 2 or 3? I can see Greta as either or.

Also Vordrak is definitely either a Type 3 or 10 in my opinion (yes I know he is technically an alt-right Gamer Gater, but anti-SJWs and alt-righters do use almost the same exact playbook though).

Rory/rcdart strikes me as either a Type 4 or 9. Leaning towards 9 simply because she uses social justice, especially transgender identities as a means to fulfill her 'trans' Captain America fetish.

Almost positive Cecily Kelogg is a Type 2 and one of the more repulsive Type 2's as well.

 

[Jaimas]

Would it be fair to say that Greta of Trans Life Line is a Type 2 or 3? I can see Greta as either or.

Greta acts like a Type 1 and has shades of Type 3 (going to Null's to threaten him for example), but at the end of the day, Greta is a Type 4, plain and simple, motivated by profit and the need to hobnob with important people. TLL exists solely to further this goal.

Also Vordrak is definitely either a Type 3 or 10 in my opinion (yes I know he is technically an alt-right Gamer Gater, but anti-SJWs and alt-righters do use almost the same exact playbook though).

Vordrak is a Type 3 by virtue of vitriol alone. He'd technically be a Type 9 but his willingness to scorch the fucking earth to bury his own culpability pushes him over the bar.

Rory/rcdart strikes me as either a Type 4 or 9. Leaning towards 9 simply because she uses social justice, especially transgender identities as a means to fulfill her 'trans' Captain America fetish.

R0ry is in it for the ego stoke and porn. Type 4.

Almost positive Cecily Kelogg is a Type 2 and one of the more repulsive Type 2's as well.

Type 4. The entire "MY DAUGHTER CAME OUT AS TRANS" is being done to push her own career.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Greta acts like a Type 1 and has shades of Type 3 (going to Null's to threaten him for example), but at the end of the day, Greta is a Type 4, plain and simple, motivated by profit and the need to hobnob with important people. TLL exists solely to further this goal.



Vordrak is a Type 3 by virtue of vitriol alone. He'd technically be a Type 9 but his willingness to scorch the fucking earth to bury his own culpability pushes him over the bar.



R0ry is in it for the ego stoke and porn. Type 4.



Type 4. The entire "MY DAUGHTER CAME OUT AS TRANS" is being done to push her own career.

At least I got Vordrak and Rory right. I am still rather confused on how to categorize cows in the Bestiary.

Any cows that would be a Type 10 aside from Jerelyn Luther?

And would Striker Wolf be Type 3, Type 9, or Type 10 (I know, racist babyfur that supports Trump, but he does show shades of 3, 9, and 10 with his behavior).

 

[Jaimas]

At least I got Vordrak and Rory right. I am still rather confused on how to categorize cows in the Bestiary

This is not your fault. A lot of cows we cover seem to exist to try to thwart the ranking systems. Thankfully there's a decent breakdown on the means and methods; the hallmarks if you will of each type:

If they're in it to grandstand about culture and the need to guide humanity towards the promised land, they're a Type 1.

If they're in it to try to foster a cult of personality or maintain it, they're a Type 2.

If they're a lone nutter and/or so loud, vicious, or obnoxious that they unsettle even other SJWs, they're a type 3.

If they're in it for money, power, attention, or e-fame, they're a type 4.

If they legitimately believe in a better world and believe legitimately that this is the best way to make it happen, they're a Type 5.

If they're in it because they're ignorant or just trying to fit in with a crowd, they're a Type 6. You'll note that Type 6s don't get threads usually.

If they're in it because they wanna fuck someone they're white-knighting, they're a Type 7.

If they're in it to dogpile and attack someone with the tactics of a lynchmob, they're a Type 8.

If they're in it to redeem themselves for a transgression or to normalize that transgression, they're a Type 9.

If they're there to "SHUT IT DOWN" a critic usually social pressure and being a controversy-stirring dickass, they're a Type 10.

Any cows that would be a Type 10 aside from Jerelyn Luther?

Type 10s are rare as far as SocJus cows we cover; they're far more common with BLM-type cows (which are less-common than the breeds we cover) than anything else. Kiva Bay is probably the best example of a Type 10 though the argument can be made that she's a Type 4 can be made as well.

Crystal Hall is a good example of a Type 10, shouting others down on TLL's behest.

And would Striker Wolf be Type 3, Type 9, or Type 10 (I know, racist babyfur that supports Trump, but he does show shades of 3, 9, and 10 with his behavior).

Striker falls sort of outside the heirarchy due to ideology, but he closest aligns with Type 9.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Would Ghost of True Capitalist Radio be a Type 1, 3, 4, or 10? I can see Ghost as these most likely. Leaning towards 3 or 4 but the other two types I would not be too surprised with either.

Could you make a list of the most to least common Types as well?

 

[Meowthkip]

Would Ghost of True Capitalist Radio be a Type 1, 3, 4, or 10? I can see Ghost as these most likely. Leaning towards 3 or 4 but the other two types I would not be too surprised with either.

Could you make a list of the most to least common Types as well?

Ghost ain't no goddamn fruitbowl ess-jay-dubya.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Ghost ain't no goddamn fruitbowl ess-jay-dubya.

I know but the Bestiary could apply to almost any political cow, including Ghost.

Alright, for listing the most to least common types of SJWs/Political Cows, here's my take on it:

This will be from most common to least common:

Type 6/Cannon Fodder:
These are the common ones, even though they are probably the least likely to actually end up on here. They are just here to fit in and/or are perhaps misguided, nothing more. An example of a Type 6 would actually be Chris-chan (though his SJW politics are the least significant reasons as to why he is a massive lolcow in the first place).

Type 8/Harridian:
These guys are the ones that you will likely see on college campuses or in protests, or even on certain parts of the internet *cough*tumblr*cough*. Examples of Type 8s are Trigglypuff and Smugglypuff.

Type 4/Profiteer:
Believe it or not, Type 4s are more common than you would think: many SJWs are only in it for either the money, attention, fame, or to just further their careers. You will often see them in social media, such as twitter, tumblr, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, and other sites. Type 4s can range from obscure bloggers that most people don't give a shit about to well known celebrities (though many celebrities and/or famous internet people are Type 1s as well). Cecily Kellogg, Randi Harper, Sophie Labelle, and Greta of Trans Life Line are some examples of Type 4s.

Type 7/Token Male:
Most of the time, male SJWs are not inherently Type 7s, but Type 6s, Type 9s, or Type 4s. Type 7s are the ones who are SJWs just to get laid. These are the ones that many call 'cucks' or 'beta males' and often for good reason. Examples of this breed of SJW are Anthony Burch, Dan Olson, David Gallant, and Jake Alley.

Type 9/Self-Redemptionist:
Self-Redemptionists (AKA Type 9s), are more common than you would think they are. Many people that you would think would be Type 7 (or any other Type), would actually be Type 9. This type can come in two breeds: the first breed of Type 9 is one trying to redeem themself from past sins, whether they be real or imaginary, the second breed is the ones that try to use Social Justice/politics to cover up their more reprehensible actions or personalities, be it pedophilia, sexual deviancy, abusive nature and treatment of other people, or other horrible things. Andrew Dobson and HBomberGuy are examples of the first breed of Type 9 and Jerry Peet, Springtrapp, DragonDicks/Cuteosphere, and Sarah Nyberg are examples of the second breed of Type 9.

Type 2/Cult Leader:
Type 2s are very, VERY common on sites like tumblr and twitter. This type is easily some of the more abusive and reprehensible breeds of SJWs, and this type THRIVES on tumblr and twitter in particular, as it is very easy for them to gain power, influence, and control of other people through echo-chambers and circlejerks. You don't see them often outside of tumblr and twitter, but these guys are a huge factor as to why tumblr and twitter are widely considered to be a fucking cancer to other people. Notorious Type 2s include Nora Reed, Vade, Purple Kecleon, ThatIckyThing, TundranVoltaire, IDislikeCisPeople, and Takashi0, whose primary domain is either tumblr or twitter. Hell, perhaps a good portion of tumblr/twitter cows featured here could fall into Type 2 or at the very least have shades of Type 2.

Type 3/Extremist:
Believe it or not, true Type 3s are not as common as you would think, their counterpart the Type 8, is much more common. These guys are loners and are easily the most violent and vitrolic members of the Social Justice/Political Sphere, but in terms of numbers, the other types mentioned above are more likely to be seen. However, Type 3s are a lot more common than the other three types below it, hence why they are not seen as rare as they are. Phillip Vincent Haskins-Delici/Ahuviya Harel/Isabel Rosa Arujo, Vordrak, Chloe Sagal, and Zarna Joshi are examples of Type 3s.

Type 1/Cultural Hegemonist:
This type is often reserved for older, more wealthy people, whether they be internet famous or even well-known celebrities (celebrities can also be Type 4s), and as such, they will have a lot of influence on the discourse that goes on in the world of Social Justice/Politics. Examples of Type 1s include MovieBob, Brianna Wu, Anita Sarkeesian, Jonathan MacIntosh, and Zoe Quinn.

Type 10/Movement Egomaniac:
This type is found mainly in certain circles of Social Justice/Politics, mainly in certain parts of the Black Lives Matter movement, and as a result, are actually very rare, especially in comparison to almost all of the other Types of SJW/Political Cow. Still, they are quite a pain in the ass regardless of how common they actually are though, and Jerelyn Luther is a good example of a Type 10 in action.

Type 5/Utopian:
This cow is perhaps by far, the rarest breed of SJW, and it is very hard to spot a true Type 5. These are the rare ones who actually give a shit about Social Justice/Politics/Activism and for an example, Erick Kolacek is Type 5.

Do you guys agree with this?

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

I should add Benjanun Sriduangkaew as a Type 2 to the masterlist of SJW types as she definitely has some serious Type 2 vibes with shades of 3 and/or 1.

Also would Riley/DTWPS be a Type 3?

 

[Jaimas]

I should add Benjanun Sriduangkaew as a Type 2 to the masterlist of SJW types as she definitely has some serious Type 2 vibes with shades of 3 and/or 1.

Also would Riley/DTWPS be a Type 3?

Name I'm not going to bother to try to pronounce is a type 2. Wants to be a Type 1, is as nutty as a type 3, still a type 2 at the end of the day.

Riley is so vile even other Tumblr SJWs call him a piece of shit. Type 4 because scam artist.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Name I'm not going to bother to try to pronounce is a type 2. Wants to be a Type 1, is as nutty as a type 3, still a type 2 at the end of the day.

Riley is so vile even other Tumblr SJWs call him a piece of shit. Type 4 because scam artist.

I would have said Riley was a 3 with shades of 4, considering that even other SJWs find Riley to be absolutely reprehensible (which is a huge indicator of Type 3), but I definitely see where you are coming from.

Also the BLMatsu crowd (like todokaras, matsufiend, and all the others) are like some fucked up hybrid of Type 9 (of the Springtrapp breed) and 2 (especially todokaras (she is a hybrid of 9 and 2 definitely)).

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Alright, I was autistic enough to make this masterlist.

Here it is!

Suggestions are welcome!

 

[RockVolnutt]

Alright, I was autistic enough to make this masterlist.

Here it is!

Suggestions are welcome!

As the person who brought up Destiny, I'm going to point out he's not right wing. He only has the mannerisms of an alt-righter like throwing cuck and faggot around, everything else is standard SJW.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

As the person who brought up Destiny, I'm going to point out he's not right wing. He only has the mannerisms of an alt-righter like throwing cuck and faggot around, everything else is standard SJW.

I didn't know too much about Destiny so my understanding of him was that he was an alt-righter. Thanks for correcting me though, I updated it to provide the correct information.

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ThDrlCYfZVsM1dOOS9GG1eG3GOP1NINWywfP1cRRuew/edit?usp=sharing

Updated the list to add the BAMN crowd.

Feel free to add any suggestions for any of the entries on the masterlist!

 

[DirkBloodStormKing]

Corey and Dave are Type 9 because of their creepy-ass fetishes (aka Type 9 of the Springtrap Breed).
These two are from this thread.