best of ALR -

Your_Fairy_Wish_Prince

I am your Fairy Wish Prince, at your service
kiwifarms.net
If you talk about Becky snapping, that won't happen. And if you are saying about her neck snapping that won't happen too, no rope can stand that weight, you might need a steel cable and some crane to do the job.
This talk made a thought come to my mind. How the hell could AOr Necky suicide? I'm not talking about their drug, food, but suicide at the moment. A bullet would miss their small brain, they would need thousands of painkillers because of their bodies, a rope would snap, a knife to their veins would find lard and nothing else, you must need a lot of poison too. And gas, well, just one Amber fart could be the equivalent of Zyklon B.
A simple push down the basement stairs imagine all that weight smashing down on a skull, neck, spine...ribcage.
 

Fupacabra

kiwifarms.net
My favorites are when I can see her full body while she tries to walk by waddling around like a giant penguin with her fupa jiggling. I love how tiny her head looks at the top of that lard montain she calls her body.

My least favorite are hauls where she just shows some cheap boring walmart clutter.
 

Pitere pit

Do you like my car?
kiwifarms.net
Omg my favorite is the Cook With Me videos too. They're so nasty. And even though it's the same thing every time, she somehow always makes them equally horrifying. It's awesome. I wish she would make a cooking channel, I know she hates cooking (I would too if I was that bad) but it would be funny as hell. Amber, if you're reading, please make a cooking channel.

My least favorite moments are the non-Torrid hauls. I never watch those. (Idk if those are moments but whatever) Like nobody cares, she never gets cool stuff or even regular stuff but for a bargain. At least the Torrid hauls can be used for gross-out entertainment. But the item hauls? Automatic skip.
I would religiously watch a complete tv channel dedicated to the best cooks that ever existed, you know, masters of culinary arts like Sandra Lee, simply Sarah, Hamberlynn and Jack Salmonelli. It would be hilarious.
And the torrid and non torrid hauls are too boring for me, I prefer watching necky bambling about shit than watch the hauls.
 

ducktales4gameboy

git branch -d giant_boobs
kiwifarms.net
As someone who only started following ALR in the last month due to a non-kiwi friend (correctly) recommending her as a grade A trainwreck, her shameless near pathological lying about things like her weight gain have been the most amusing parts. Either that or her trying to wear that parachute-sized flowy torrid dress and only managing to fit it as a shirt instead of a full-body garment and being completely okay with that.

Did she do the same obvious weight denial thing when she hit 400 and 500?
 

Purple Pepsi

Feeling thirsty?
kiwifarms.net
Favorite moments: The Destiny breakup is definitely at the top. I also like the slam poetry video about the rape lie, the "beanbag in a hurry video", and any time Becky is angry or upset (the way she says "You have already stirred the pot" and "She just likes the 'tenshun cuz she never got none" in one video is especially funny to me).

Least favorite is any of the non-Torrid hauls and any of her Snapchats with those voice-changing filters. I cant get through any of them for longer than thirty seconds.
 
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Cuck Duck

Ducky Mo Ducky Momo, he's your very best friend!
kiwifarms.net
I would religiously watch a complete tv channel dedicated to the best cooks that ever existed, you know, masters of culinary arts like Sandra Lee, simply Sarah, Hamberlynn and Jack Salmonelli. It would be hilarious.
And the torrid and non torrid hauls are too boring for me, I prefer watching necky bambling about shit than watch the hauls.
Can we please make this a thing? There was already a show about the worst cooks of America.
 
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Fleasburger

Fleas on a burger.
kiwifarms.net
When Hamber and Destiny were at work together. She revealed her true cuntiness. Loved it.

I hate the Necky saga too. Boring af.

There's already a thread for our favorite Amber sitchuashons.. Isn't this the same thing?
 
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Strawberry Pocky

If anybody needs me, I'll be in the Angry Dome.
kiwifarms.net
Fuck it adding another because it's not actually the Big Ham.

Destiny Moment: Hamber begs and begs and begs Dusty to buy her a giant soft plush teddy bear from WalMart and she never actually does. Smash cut to a while later.....post one spectacular dumping AND picking up a new girlfriend ; Destiny bought that exact same giant stuffed teddy bear for her new girlfriend Dana. No questions asked.

Hamber's Gigantic Shelf Ass: Chapped RAW.
 

TwinkoStorr

kiwifarms.net
Fuck it adding another because it's not actually the Big Ham.

Destiny Moment: Hamber begs and begs and begs Dusty to buy her a giant soft plush teddy bear from WalMart and she never actually does. Smash cut to a while later.....post one spectacular dumping AND picking up a new girlfriend ; Destiny bought that exact same giant stuffed teddy bear for her new girlfriend Dana. No questions asked.

Hamber's Gigantic Shelf Ass: Chapped RAW.
I swear I have no idea how she wasn't embarrassed to upload that video.
When she said "you almost said my name" when Destiny was talking about Dana.
My MenTaL ThiNgS hurt when I watch that shit.
 
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