Careercow Bob "MovieBob" Chipman - Obese Fascist Eugenics-Loving Elitist Pop Culture Critic with a Mario & MCU Fetish Leading us to a Superior Future!

How will MovieBob react to Captain Marvel's Release?

  • Boycott it until #JamesGunnRehired

    Votes: 4 3.5%
  • Burn his screener copy on camera to protest James Gunn's firing

    Votes: 1 0.9%
  • See it once in theaters

    Votes: 4 3.5%
  • See it twice in theaters because he wants to "appreciate Brie's acting".

    Votes: 18 15.8%
  • See it multiple times in theaters then declare it that year's Oscar winner

    Votes: 34 29.8%
  • The above but also declare it a new era in cinema and the cure for his diabetes

    Votes: 47 41.2%
  • Islamic Content (Elaborate in as much graphic detail as humanly possible)

    Votes: 6 5.3%

  • Total voters
    114
  • Poll closed .

Rekkington

Obama chuckled. "You mean the chaos emeralds?"
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Cosmug

Gay Niggers from Ultra Space
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That's the only idea he's had in that post that isn't completely insane. He should go outside with a shovel and do it.
That would involve getting off his ass/Twitter. Bob is a legitimate addict of social media and has wrapped his entire worldview around the “importance” of him pissing into the wind online about how everyone who disagrees with him deserves to be killed. Albeit he’s nutless enough to phrase it in a way that gives him plausible deniability on the “killed” part, usually by vagueposting about how blue collar whites need to SOMEHOW be deprived of the ability to influence the trajectory of the nation because they keep caring about jobs and manufacturing instead of beer and capeshit cinema.
 

Flexo

serial #3370318
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That's the only idea he's had in that post that isn't completely insane. He should go outside with a shovel and do it.
No joke, I have a friend and his dad and uncles that I guarantee you have planted more trees than Bob.

They're all red state farmers who voted for Trump too. (There was a gov program that encouraged tree planting.)

The saying goes: those who can't do - teach. Bob shows us that those who can't do OR teach, sperg all day on social media.
 

Senior Lexmechanic

Shitposting displeases the Omnissiah
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Didn’t he support the idea that nature should regrow in the red states?
Yeah, I remember him basically saying that the US population should be crammed into a single Mega-City and the rest of the US should be rewilded (with a side option of "Wasteland Ghouls should be left to survive in wilderness"). I assume the food appears out of thin air in this scenario.
 

thismanlies

The Funnest Part of Gaming is Looting Corpses.
True & Honest Fan
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Chris Rock sperging.
8614A98F-A866-46D8-8A7C-32DA48F145F1.jpeg
Now check this out. A white woman named Susan McCrackerton wakes up in a strange basement. All she remembers is she was drinking mimosas with her white lady friends hangin' out at the cougar bar, when she felt light headed and passed out. Then the bitch wakes up. Now, you know that puppet that comes out riding a tricycle saying "I wanna play a little game?" Turns out your average nigga didn't take stage craft in high school. So all Susan McCrackerton's gonna see is a nigga wearin' all black, in a dark-ass basement, with a sock puppet. Now he's gonna say, in a very familiar voice, "bout time you woke yo ass up, bitch!"

Susan McCrackerton's gonna look at him a little confused. She says "Your voice sounds familiar. Weren't you in Scary Movie?"

Now this is the point where the nigga with the sock puppet comes out of the shadows. He's gonna step forward and reveal himself as... Marlon Wayans. He's gonna be mad as hell. He's gonna be like "I ain't Marlon Wayans! Now shut yo bitch ass up! We gonna play a little game now, ya hear?"

Now this is where the horror begins. Susan mcCrackerton rolls her eyes and says something that ain't nobody's expenin'. She says "Hey Siri, call 911 and tell them a white woman's in trouble."

Marlon knows he fucked up. All anyone can hear is tires screeching in front of his house followed by Officer Peckerwood shouting over a bullhorn "Okay nigga, get yo ass out here!"

So Marlon opens his front door, but just enough for a peek. He sticks his open hands through the crack and said "I got my hands up, officer!"

But Officer Peckerwood doesn't give a shit. He shouts "HE'S GOTTA GUN IN HIS TEETH!" and the police light his ass up like the 4th of July. They fire so many god damn bullets, the house collapses. It's gonna be like *grubbalahubbalahubbalahubbala*! Shit's gonna be on fire!

But out of the ashes and smoke, comes Susan McCrackerton, clean as if she stepped out the shower. She's gonna run into the arms of Officer Peckerwood and say "Thank goodness you're here! That negro was going to defile me!"

Now Officer Peckerwood is gonna turn towards the camera and say "Don't thank me. Thank President Donald Trump."

Then with a smile and an A-Okay, we roll the motherfucking credits.
 

Emperor Julian

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Gee, I thought that I was being hyperbolic when I said about a year or two ago that MovieBob's morality is not dissimilar to that of Tywin Lannister.

I feel that's unfair, Tywin had a cold solid logic to his actions, he didnt give a single fuck about the peasents but he didnt really have a proactive disdain for them. Tywin was an actual pragmatist in that his horrible actions are motivated by clear aims and objectives, for example the horrific red wedding was ultimatly about ending a war against an enemy he was struggling to defeat and ultimatly worked really well.

Twyin would take on look at US politics and begin considering how exactly he's going to make himself or his chosen candidate president. If it doesnt pan out that campaign, he isnt going to bitch or cry but you're going to have to watch the fuck out for him campaign season after campaign season. Because he'll just come up with a new plan to get the common man to vote for him
Bobs closer to a Balon Greyjoy in that he will stick with his god-awful attitude and shitty idea's even when they're totally counter productive. Rob Stark offered him everything he wanted on a platter and his response was to shit the bed because he can't get over his absurd pride or bitterness. Or Maybe a Randly Tarley as he's a just a nasty cunt whose endless posturing is totally at odds with his reality.
 

LordKaT

True & Honest Fan
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Karl_der_Grosse

GG Allin once threw his poop at me.
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Didn’t he support the idea that nature should regrow in the red states?
Yes, his idea was that all mayo wasteland ghouls should be forcibly removed from red states and the land should be mostly returned to nature. Almost in the same breath he advocated that these same areas should be used to place all immigrants who want to come to the US. And, of course, that there should be no limits whatsoever to immigration.

I assume the food appears out of thin air in this scenario.
Something something robot farms. Like the illegals wouldn't smash them up and use the shiny bits on their low-riders.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Knyttet

Count groudon

Saltier than Njord's left testicle
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Kinda ironic that Bob “nuke all the subhuman manual laborers” Chipman worships Mario, a hard-working plumber/construction worker clad in a red cap with an M on it. Doubly so because he claims to prefer the cartoon version since his grandfather was a plumber.

Do you think he even realizes the fucked up irony here?
 

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