Careercow Bob "MovieBob" Chipman - A 39 year old Obese Fascist Eugenics-Loving Elitist Pop Culture Consoomer/Critic/Basement Dweller with a Mario & MCU Fetish Leading us to a Superior Future!

  • Apologies for the site issues. The server's shipment was delayed. I'll ask again about it and if they can't provide it I'll source another.

How will Bob spend the rest of the year?

  • Getting roasted by other lefties due to his genocidal insanity

  • Learning to code

  • Learning Mandarin Chinese

  • Poisoning himself with his cooking

  • Getting fired from The Escapist

  • Losing his legs to diabetes

  • Registering an account on Kiwi Farms

  • Your choice (Please describe in detail)


Results are only viewable after voting.

REGENDarySumanai

Not So Bad Once You Try It, Right?
Supervisor
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
If movie Bob is still hateful towards Sonic, I can't wait until he has to review the Final Fantasy 7 Remake

New Opening movie really hints that they're gonna put in shit from Crisis Core


I bet he's going to suddenly lionize 6 because that's what all the nintendo shills do.
6 is a legitimately good game (and my favorite) and easily the best of all the Nintendo ones, but I cannot deny 7's legacy. About time it got remade though, because the original PS1 release aged like tard cum in a lot of respects.
 

Marissa Moira

kiwifarms.net
6 is a legitimately good game (and my favorite) and easily the best of all the Nintendo ones, but I cannot deny 7's legacy. About time it got remade though, because the original PS1 release aged like tard cum in a lot of respects.
Maybe Bob will decide to go Ultimate Contrarian and say That Final Fantasy 3 (The original 3) was the best game and that it's majesty of a final dungeon is lost among the unwashed peons.
 

LiquidKid

If Lions Like It, You Know It’s Bad.
kiwifarms.net
To make matters worse , the movie is looking to best its opening projection with $55 million this weekend.
In a perfect world, sonic makes more money than Mario 2022 and Bob necks himself


Robert's assmad that people reacted negatively to his shit take on the Sonic movie:
He's also mad that one of his waifus, Elizabeth Warren is never going to be president:
Things aren't going to well for Robert. First his favorite movie of the month (Birds of Prey) flops and now a movie he hates is currently outperforming it. He's also going to have to face the reality that his waifu Warren will never be the democratic nominee, let alone president.
Bob... Tulsi and Gabbard are the same person. How do you mess up something so simple if you’re from brainland?


Since when does Bob review video games?
He’s done so every now and then. I know for a fact he reviewed Mario 3D World for Escapist for instance, he probably wouldn’t touch final fantasy outside of a big picture episode though
 
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אΩ+1

The Aleph
kiwifarms.net
If movie Bob is still hateful towards Sonic, I can't wait until he has to review the Final Fantasy 7 Remake

New Opening movie really hints that they're gonna put in shit from Crisis Core


I bet he's going to suddenly lionize 6 because that's what all the nintendo shills do.
Yes, considering that the console wars of the the 4th generation were his Vietnam.

 

Bolo

kiwifarms.net
Since when does Bob review video games?
Since when Robert gives a shit about videogames?

No, seriously, when was the last time Robert has said anything about playing a game? Whever Robert says anything about playing a game, is wasting his quarters on those ticket arcades to get shitty prizes.

I know he made a review for the escapist about Super Mario 3d World, but aside from that he never had a game review again and on his gamer overthinker videos he barely discussed the game themselves, only the social optics and politics around it.

Even on his book he said he dropped games on the SNES and played a bit of the game boy advanced and that was it.

I doubt Robert has ever even played FVII, all he seems to know are the obvious pop-cultural things involved with the game.

Robert loves the whole "harm" feeling whenever he sees nintendo characters and such, even tweeting thing like "home" with a photo of a mini-nes for the internet "wholesome" points.... but actually playing the damned things? Nah, he is too busy searching his own name on twitter.
 

The tired cat

Fluffy angel of death
kiwifarms.net
It was a 2 part video of Game Overthinker. Part 1 he talks about the problems with Sonic. This was at the time when the Sonic Cycle meme was popular. Part 2 is where he pitches his idea for how to fix Sonic, and yes, the title card is Mario carrying Sonic's corpse.

Some of the ideas are not awful such as having a sort of bullet time to represent Sonic moving at super speed. At the 5 minute mark is where he goes off the rails and declares a jihad against anything after the Mega Drive. 7:25 is where he pitches his idea for the plot, which is basically a typical hero with amnesia story crossed with a cowboy movie.
Ya know, it's kinda funny Bobo's whole sperging "THE ENTIRE CAST SHOULD BE MURDERED!!" is usually the same thing every chucklefuck "expert" was spouting back then. Pretty much-ignoring people who did like other characters than the blue hedgehog.
 

AngeloTheWizard

Bringer of amusing Let's Sperg threads
kiwifarms.net
Reading some of Bob's other pitches is a riot.
His Megaman pitch for example.
In it Dr. Light and Dr. Wily are friends initially, Light being the upper class gentleman and Wily being from the dang dirty working class, but of course end up clashing.
Wily wanting to use automation to drive the working class extinct because he was bullied as child, holy fuck the projection is real.
Other than that it has everything you expect.
The out of place violence and grittiness, the shallow MCU tier "adult" themes in what is on paper for kids...You get the idea.
Or his Captain Planet pitch which is...It's just the fucking Avengers with a Captain Planet skin, big surprise right.
Oh and the villain is an eldritch/lovecraftian abomination, those are Bob's exact words, called, I shit you not, Zarm.
And
theres a rip off of Jarvis/Vision from Iron Man as well. Again big surprise.
And then theres his MCU X-Men pitch...which is just his MCU fanfiction.
It's honestly the most boring of the bunch.
Seriously though guys I can't do this stuff "justice" you need to go read it for yourselves.
You won't believe that he unironically wrote the absolute lunacy you'll be witnessing.
The Protomen use the same idea of Light and Wily being friends...though I think its Light that is working class in that one-his father was a miner and his love also "works her fingers til they bleed" so his whole motive is making robots to give people easier lives. Which is just Bob's anathema, a thinker using his gifts to make the lives of wasteland ghouls EASIER?
 

CharlesBarkley

kiwifarms.net
Bob, as anyone who reads this thread knows is pretty much the most obnoxious person alive, which is amazing because all he does it post tweets, eat, and make shitty videos. When not ranting about fair-weather neoliberal politics in a zeal that makes hitler look slightly more easy going, he just CONSUMES children's media. His levels of snobbery coming from a fat diabetic sexless man-child with no real job is hilarious.

So, whatever. But I have no idea how he can have non-ironic fans. Like, look at this asshole about his sonic review.

20200215_064058.jpg

"Your survival..." nigga. Really? This dude literally does nothing but clog his mouth hole with junk food and tweet. You shouldn't worry about his gay little cold but the massive coronary coming up here soon after he gets a little too heated when Trump tweets some sick burns on Warren.
 

Leblanc

trapped with sand and mormons
kiwifarms.net
Bob, as anyone who reads this thread knows is pretty much the most obnoxious person alive, which is amazing because all he does it post tweets, eat, and make shitty videos. When not ranting about fair-weather neoliberal politics in a zeal that makes hitler look slightly more easy going, he just CONSUMES children's media. His levels of snobbery coming from a fat diabetic sexless man-child with no real job is hilarious.

So, whatever. But I have no idea how he can have non-ironic fans. Like, look at this asshole about his sonic review.

View attachment 1145946

"Your survival..." nigga. Really? This dude literally does nothing but clog his mouth hole with junk food and tweet. You shouldn't worry about his gay little cold but the massive coronary coming up here soon after he gets a little too heated when Trump tweets some sick burns on Warren.
If it's really about widescreen Roberts survival maybe keep him away from chicken and mountain dew
 

Godzilla@1989

DESTROY US ALL!
kiwifarms.net
The fact Sonic is on track to make $55 million this weekend demonstrates that the Blue Blur is still more relevant than Bob can ever hope to be.
Now it’s $60 million thanks to grossing $21 million on Friday.

The fact that it might now top Detective Pikachu is surprising.
 

The tired cat

Fluffy angel of death
kiwifarms.net
Now it’s $60 million thanks to grossing $21 million on Friday.

The fact that it might now top Detective Pikachu is surprising.
Man, Bobo's brain is gonna implode because of this. Seriously, I can just see him having a massive twitter sperg out.
 

Godzilla@1989

DESTROY US ALL!
kiwifarms.net
Man, Bobo's brain is gonna implode because of this. Seriously, I can just see him having a massive twitter sperg out.
I’ll be honest, I never expected Sonic to be better than expected. I was hoping it does well because the studio listened to the fans, but not doing better than expected. In fact, thanks to good word of mouth and not much competition until maybe March or when the next Bond comes out, it might do better along the way.

To be honest, this could have been a disaster had Paramount not redesign the character and ignored the fans.
 

Absolutego

Burning in the Melting Pot
kiwifarms.net
It’s probably both. Bob cannot be happy about sonic having a more competent live action film than Mario
Oh it's tearing him up inside. This is the man who has admitted he basically gaslit himself into liking the Bob Haskins Mario movie because he couldn't tolerate the idea of a Mario property being bad. An ok Sonic movie existing before a decent Mario live action movie is figuratively killing him.