Burger King General Thread - UPDATE: Despite Spergy OP

[NumberingYourState]

I'm going to settle with some :powerlevel: gold here just to make a (pointless) point.

Sonic, you know that cheesy ass drive-thru where nobody who works there sticks to the theme? At least their shitty aspects I can tolerate, it'll at least have a peaceful hill to die on. Burger King on the other hand? Well...

This is the only kind of person who enjoys Burger King anymore. What was BK before it deserved a thread?

Not much.

Everyone expects a chain restaurant to suck ass when you try and spend as little as possible for anything. The people who work at these places often encounter the shittiest lazy assholes who never appreciate any level of quality that CAN come from a cheap order. The difference between BK and McDonald's is at least McDonald's can hide their employee's misery with effective advertisement. There are examples of low budget or even royalty-free acting in commercials, that are okay, it's just that most companies in general suck at making cheaper advertisements that aren't cringe-worthy. The 1970's had a better taste in advertising quickly made slop.


Example of how terrible Burger King is compared to the rest:

But what about the food? Who watches these commercials anyways, when we can bitch about the food instead?

• 9/10 times Burger King overdresses with Mustard and Ketchup
• 9/10 times Burger King's soda tastes flatter or stranger than the rest
  • Brown soda tastes all the same from their fountain
• Service has always been middling to awful according to online reviews
  • The people who work there in my experience barely make eye contact
• Dollar menu is pointless when you can make a bigger sandwich for less (nothing) at home
  • Everyone else's dollar menu is actually better in both quality and consistency
• Pickles taste of nothing
  • Tomato's only add moisture to the dry ass patty
• Special menu items are lazier than Taco Bell's
  • Putting fries on a burger and charging extra when any functionally qualified individual can do it themselves, no really it's five fucking fries if you ask them to do it

Also, to go back to the subject of marketing, who the hell thought this was a clever jab at Ronald McDonald statues? Who thought this was remotely pleasant to look at if you couldn't skip commercials or change the channel right away?

I don't really read much into Burger King except for the fact they are the only chain barely in the top ten who get everything wrong compared to Sonic Drive-Thru. They get EVERYTHING wrong but still break the bank.

 

[Jaiman]

I really like Mac n Cheetos

 

[Ntwadumela]

TBH I haven't had Burger King in ages (though that's more to do with staying healthy) but it wasn't that bad.
I guess it's different here. My only issue is that they tend to oversize their products.

 

[Shokew]

I worked at BK - then I learned what real sandwiches are and haven't looked back, since. I'll gladly pay 10+ bucks for a nice sandwich and some chips or pizza with chicken, or anything else before I waste another dollar at places like BK, thank you very much.

 

[AnimuGinger]

I could survive on their chicken fries.

Rumor has it if you leave a negative Yelp review, the King rapes you brutally in the shower.

 

[Bassomatic]

I have one good memory of BK ever. It was like 3 years after they had the "shaq pak" my brother kept asking for one the poor lady barely spoke english, it turned into what I can only call a Seinfieldian moment.

BK was always awful but as a teen was a mover and no limit of calories could fill us so my buddy and I always tried to see if we could put down 3 quad stackers it never happened but I think it's been nearly 15 years since BK and intend to keep it that way.

 

[Spudnik]

Whoppers are nasty, but I love 'em

I'll say in general, the customer service experience is worst at BK, maybe below McDonald's most days and definitely way below Wendy's, typically. However, I have had one extremely well-made burger at a small burger king off an interstate exit to a nothing town. Took forever to take our orders, despite no one else being there. BUT when I got my burger, it was really nice and Looked just like the picture on the menu. I've never seen anything like it, it was beautiful.

Edit: forgot that the local burger king continues to cuck me...I don't like traditional breakfast options, and you can order a whopper during breakfast!...but they never have the broiler on, and I refuse to wait 30 minutes in a fucking burger king. (honestly their croissants are pretty good, though)

 

[Ginger Piglet]

I quite like BK. Prefer it to McDonald's in fact, although I miss the crinkly "Satisfries" they used to do which were proper and crispy and nice as opposed to the flaccid bits of lukewarm spud that McDonald's throw at you. The current BK chips are not as good.

Also they tend to have fresher vegetables than McDonald's in my experience.

I do still find it hilarious that when the Peter Jackson remake of King Kong emerged in 2005 or whenever it was, the local BK put up posters for a deal called "KONG MY WHOPPER." Which sounds like a sexual demand. That's right, bitch, kong my whopper!

 

[Pikimon]

Their fries are too salty

 

[BOLDYSPICY!]

. . .what even is this thread?

When I was still working for the university police, there was a Burger King close to the football stadium & the arena where concert events were held, so we'd all pile into the bed of the traffic truck with the cones & grab a bite.

There was one time where I was on the rag something fierce & one of my coworkers was teasing me about my order, which was pretty much a day's worth of calories, & with the short-lived Funnel Cake Sticks on top of that. I yelled something to effect of "FUCK YOU I AM BLEEDING LIKE A NEW YOUNG INMATE'S ASSHOLE RIGHT NOW," & several officers (including the veteran lieutenant who drove us there) spat out their drinks. It was beautiful.

Five years later, the lieutenant still messages me about that. Good times, good times.

Point is I miss their funnel cake fries or whatever.

 

[NumberingYourState]

Burger King isn't Chris's definition of bold or spicy.. That's what this thread is.

 

[Ginger Piglet]

"FUCK YOU I AM BLEEDING LIKE A NEW YOUNG INMATE'S ASSHOLE RIGHT NOW,"

"I'M PASSING CLAWTS THE SAAAHHHZ OF BAAASKETBAWLS!" - S.O.D, "Pre-Menstrual Princess Blues."

Well, that's what I heard on reading that bit.

 

[Bassomatic]

I quite like BK. Prefer it to McDonald's in fact, although I miss the crinkly "Satisfries" they used to do which were proper and crispy and nice as opposed to the flaccid bits of lukewarm spud that McDonald's throw at you. The current BK chips are not as good.

Part of the fry change is when they first did it (and was a running issue during it's sales) was those had corn starch on them to be more crisp. If you ignored the friers like BK employees tend to do... poof.

My god sister worked next to one that had 3 serious fires in a year, a single year. So instead of training employees to clean the fryer it was easier to just change the product.

 

[Cable 7]

Most of the BK's in my area are far away. One of them is conjoined with a Shawarma place that I've tried like, one.
The food's not that bad (though it migth be becasue I have no sense of taste). But the burgers look fucking disgusting.
Gross and warty, ew.

 

[c-no]

TBH I haven't had Burger King in ages (though that's more to do with staying healthy) but it wasn't that bad.
I guess it's different here. My only issue is that they tend to oversize their products.

As far as taste go, they would no doubt differ from country to country if to simply suit the palates of the locals. A Burger King in Kuwait would most likely taste better (or worse, for all we know) than one in the United States.

As far as personal experience goes with Burger King, I kinda like eating their food when I was younger, but even then, the food there wasn't all that great and most experiences there was just choosing between Burger King or a 7/11 hotdog when my dad went to meet up with friends of his. I got more enjoyment eating at a Jack in the Box than at a Burger King, especially since the burgers from Jack in the Box are bigger and have a better taste (or at least the burger I usually get).

 

[Jaimas]

BK is the only fast food place that isn't Chinese or whatever near me. It's kind of middling.

I've had way better and I've had infinitely worse.

 

[The Lawgiver]

Fucking Burgers, how do they work?

 

[Lunete]

Those BBQ sandwiches they had a few years back weren't too terribly bad. At least by fast food standards.

 

[Too Many Crooks]

Eh, I like their croissant breakfast sandwiches & their hashbrowns. The double- cheeseburgers are all right.

 

[MerriedxReldnahc]

I almost tried the Halloween Whopper last year entirely because I heard it turns your poop bright fucking green and I'm very juvenile like that. Other then that I haven't set foot in the place in years.