BUYING A HOUSE? -7/23/19 - In which amber doesn’t realize she is the house

Chía P.

kiwifarms.net
So. Much. Dandruff.
Gorl really needs to avoid wearing black when she hasn't bathed in weeks.

View attachment 854911
Oh God, that "wart". I'm not an expert but I'm pretty sure that thing's something else. It looks like a really packed black head (or a cyst) I think I can even see the dirty expanded pore when zooming that photo and I could swear it's growing. Makes more sense because she never washes her face and exfoliating is out of the question. Either way it's not kyuuuut.
 

Calling

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
This is the first time I'm giving her video my full attention, so here I go:

Honestly when you guys say "holy shit she's huge in this video", I can't see it but my god, she is MASSIVE in this. Maybe it's the earrings and the way she has her hair, I'm not a beauty guru so I can't say but damn is she buttery.

"I'm having dandruff issues" let Becky know before your monthly hosing-off, gorl!

Becky closed the door because she's sick of listening to you. Fucking mood.

Her teeth remind me of the teeth from Chicken Run:

855029


I'm surprised Becky's random factoid wasn't a rehashing of her inability to use the gun because someone shot a possum in the chicken coop and no more bullets. That is still my most favorite Becky-story ever, and there aren't a lot of those because she's the most beige human being on the planet.

She wants to buy a house that is worn down with vines growing on it. I'd love to see her try to fix that shit up with her 600 lb frame. I'd love it, I really hope she buys a shitty, old house someday. Imagine a crossover of My 600 Lb Life and Fixer Upper, minus the skill the Gaines' brought to the show.

Skipped over Becky's story because I can't follow it and I don't care.

Holy shit that's a fuckload of springrolls. Oh, but they're filled with veggies - zero points, gorls!

Oh Becky, don't bother talking to AL while she's eating, anything you say is going in one ear and out the other. "Mmhmm!"

I can't wait for OrkoTV to freak the fuck out over the ruined video quality.

"Jewwry from Tord" is her English getting more slurred? You guys keep saying mini-strokes, and I'm starting to see why.
 

ChubbyChaser

kiwifarms.net
I love how Becky asked how AL "picks out her outfits". One she wears those black pants nearly daily, not sure how she gets them on and off anymore. Then she picks a new dress shirt and sometimes adds jewelry. Not rocket science Necky when you only have to pick out a new dress shirt cause your pants and bra are fused to your body.
 

Bookish

kiwifarms.net
Amberlynn doesn't want to buy a house.

Becky wants to buy a dilapidated, boarded-up "haunted house"

Never take what the titles say literally.
I've been bamboozled. In my defense, I skip around and never finished the video. I was stupid for believing she'd actually do something that makes sense. If Becky is so intrigued, why doesn't she just research the house to find out what happened? Then she could've told the story without so much vagueness.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Cereal Killer

Tiny Clanger

My arse is unravelling
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Becky is literally mentally re.tarded. I don’t understand the fascination some people have with her. She’s a barnacle permastuck to her whale mommy. Without a cash cow like Amber she’d be unable to support herself and live independently. To make matters worse, most tards at least try to function in society, educate themselves to the best of their abilities, and ultimately seek some form of employment. Thumb just sits on her fat ass and draws crap no one would pay $1 for.
That's what's so unbearably sad about Thumbo - she WAS a fully-functioning adult; they all were until Tsar Amba hit the 'Tucky Gay Palace, exploding sloth, gluttony and deceit on all except Rickie. Who is the only one who exhibits actual pathological anxiety but nobody cares.

Erk is pointless and Thumbo was never going to win a Nobel but she was working, fat but not the slug she is now, and had some degree of autonomy. Then she lied about why she gave up work (complete with tears because we're all nasty pooheads except......er.....she was crying over incidents they had made up) and settled into a life combo of being the Sarlaac's Keeper as well as concentrating on her own weight-loss gain "journey, " and cataloguing dead rellies, all resulting in the subservient mong she is today. Congratulations, Albert. You have created a very large mini-me. Maxi-me?



My question is, how the fuck did she get those mini t rex arms to hold the camera up that high to optimize the fat girl angles?
I mean, it doesn't really help but the ability is fascinating nonetheless.
At this point she'd need to be reaching up from the moon to get the angle and no way is any of Albert's yeasty squelch besmirching my lovely moon. I have occasional use of a carefully-crafted pink glitter moon laser courtesy of my pal @Mesh Gear Fox (hi sweetie *waves*) and I will use it at the first whiff of Eau de Fromage across my pink quivering snout.

I like you all tho, so you can all come stay on my moon if I blow up earth. I'm nice like that.


Edit: @Masta - sorry, posts crossed. Isn't she just making a big fuss about a standard titration? Most of the newer, cleaner shit the doc will try first has a similar titration, so is she just being a drama queen, "I'm such a special, difficult case of my insta-diagnosed disorders that I need to take three times the dose, uwu" when that's just normal dosing? Do we know what she's even on?
 
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