can you truly apologize? is everything a selfish motive in the end? - are we all lol cows deep inside?

  • Sorry about the recent downtime. The database server is being autistic. The beatings will continue.

BF 388

A true need to apologize indicates feelings of guilt. Guilt comes from having a conscience that tells you that you have wronged a person in some way.

By apologizing, we attempt to set the wrong to right.

Only you can determine if the apology is true or not. If it's forced or coerced, it's wrong and you know it. You can never escape that.

Exigent Circumcisions

A dog's rights activist; a lover; a friend.
True & Honest Fan
OP: Do you regret never learning to punctuate your sentences properly?

Don't bother apologizing.


Hol up *siiiiiiiiip* nigga
True & Honest Fan
I think I've been selfish many times, but gf reassures me that I've only done what I thought was best for the both of us.
It's hard to believe I've not been but if those you hold close think that's not the case then apologizing for nothing is a waste of time and you should just nut up and act like a big boy and not a nancy.

Anonymous For This

Flying pierogis at vienna.
This subject reminds me of when I was a little kid and I wouldn't stop fucking around like a little shit. When my dad would finally have enough of my shit, I would apologize, and he would respond, "If you were sorry, you wouldn't have done it."

Thanks for reminding me of that. Don't apologize for it.


Buying a Switch & Animal Crossing with Trump bucks
I honestly believe that every action we take and every thought we have no matter how minuscule is based in what I would define as selfish instincts. For instance, I believe that if someone gives to charity it is not an action born out of some genuine feeling toward the disenfranchised but rather an action built upon the understanding that giving to charity will make you feel better about your own actions. I would even go as far to say that you could reasonably dilute the action of taking a bullet for someone else down and pick it apart to find a selfish reasoning. For instance, it could be reasonably assumed that the person taking the bullet in this case believes that he or she will be considered favorably for this action or perhaps is doing so because they perceive that they owe some manner of debt. In the end we're still just animals trying to survive. Our brains whether we want to believe it or not are hard wired to be self serving. I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing quite frankly. In a way it could be said that these acts are still selfless if the person in question isn't aware what baser thought developed into the current one. I don't think that's for me to say.

I suppose an easier way of putting it is these things are all rather relative and don't really matter in the larger scheme of things.
  • Optimistic
Reactions: Vorhtbame

VV 422

apologizing is a spook. regret is a spook. morality is a spook. humans do and ought to act only in their own rational self-interest

am I cool enough yet, anarchists

The Man With No Name
Not everyone has done something that warrants a true apology. Not everyone has a value system that would promote that either.

I can at least speak from experience that you can truly apologize and mean it. Guilt is part of that, as is forgiveness. You have to go on a long time if you feel you have truly done wrong and not been given forgiveness. Even then, guilt can weigh on your shoulders long after.

It might just be something that happens to only some people or maybe it just happens as you get older. I thought like OP for a long time, in the way an existentialist might. The truth might be somewhere in the middle. The person you can hurt the most and need to apologize to and forgive the most is yourself.
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: special need's H20