‘Cats’ fans demand Universal Pictures to ‘release the butthole cut’ -

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Trump's Chosen

Jolly Rager
kiwifarms.net
‘Cats’ fans demand Universal Pictures to ‘release the butthole cut’
We're sorry.

Mar 18, 2020, 7:47 am

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Good morning. Have you had your first cup of coffee yet? You’ll probably want to make that before you read this.
As confirmed cases of COVID-19 in the United States continue to rise, many Americans find themselves self-quarantined at home with a lot more free time than just a week ago. Some folks have picked up new hobbies, some have grappled with their new work-from-home lifestyles, and others have thrown themselves into advocacy work.

That advocacy work has taken on various forms, including but not limited to: petitioning for Universal Pictures to release the butthole cut of Cats.
Cats, if you recall, was one of the biggest critical and commercial failures in recent memory, reportedly losing as much as $100 million at the box office. Yet the baffling CGI musical has developed a passionate cult following and stoked intense curiosity among nearly everybody who has seen it. Among those viewers is writer/producer/director Ben Mekler, who on Tuesday night tweeted, “I desperately need a tell-all book about the making of CATS. It could really help me get through this.

Thankfully, TV writer Jack Waz was quick to offer a valuable behind-the-scenes nugget. “A VFX producer friend of a friend was hired in November to finish some of the 400 effects shots in @catsmovie,” he wrote. “His entire job was to remove CGI buttholes that had been inserted a few months before. Which means that, somewhere out there, there exists a butthole cut of Cats.” Waz followed up with a mission statement: “Finding this cut is my white whale #ReleaseTheButtholeCut.”

And with that, #ReleaseTheButtholeCut was off to the races on Twitter. Forget about the Snyder Cut; the good citizens of the internet need to see the ensemble cast including James Corden, Jason Derulo, Idris Elba, and Taylor Swift portrayed even more accurately. Knives Out director Rian Johnson even threw his clout behind the movement, tweeting, “#ReleaseTheButtholeCut is exactly what we all need right now.”

Many people sympathized with the plight of the unnamed, alleged VFX producer who worked on Cats, while some curmudgeonly Twitter users expressed their bewilderment at the hashtag.

Members of the #ReleaseTheButtholeCut movement may want to focus on securing the vocal support of Seth Rogen, who live-tweeted his Cats viewing experience while stoned last night. Rogen had many questions, understandably, but was engrossed nonetheless.

As humanity teeters on the brink of collapse, releasing the butthole cut of Cats could be the balm we so desperately seek.


Last updated Mar 18, 2020, 7:47 am



Bryan Rolli
Bryan Rolli is a reporter who specializes in streaming entertainment. He writes about music and film for Forbes, Billboard, and the Austin American-Statesman. He met Flavor Flav in two separate Las Vegas bowling alleys and still can’t stop talking about it.


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ColtWalker1847

kiwifarms.net
I admit I didn't pay close attention to parts and there was sporadic money falling from the sky and pinatas and stuff, but I don't recall a lot of instances where there was a butt pointed at the screen in a way that a butthole could even be visible?
They edited it out. Duh.
They spent $100m for cascading butt holes in every scene then the prudes at the mpaa made them take it out.
 

Opiophile

You mess with the bull, you get the bull penis.
kiwifarms.net
Yeah, where's the article explaining how Dana Carvey is trending in 2020? I legit want an answer to that.
I guess the Master of Disguise busted out his Gamer gear and has them all fooled. I'd love to get stoned and watch the butthole cut, it would be hilarious.
 

Coolio55

DON'T CALL LUIGI AT 3AM!! *OMG HE RICKROLLED ME*
kiwifarms.net
...and I thought S.T.A.L.K.E.R. had some wierd shit in it's pre-release versions.

Who pitched this? Who allowed it?
Why did nobody question it for so long?

Was it just one furry or were they all in on it?
 
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