Careercow Cellspex - Cartoon-reviewing sperg, Moviebob wannabe

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Cellspex is a former brony analyst turned cartoon critic, and home to one of the funniest bad youtube channels I've ever watched. If you want a rundown of what she does here's her reviewing a Bible movie:
If you want a summary, she does a really obnoxious recreation of the Nativity while putting on what I think is a Texas accent(?) and then praises the movie because Jesus ain't a whitie. If I remember, she also goes all edgy internet Atheist at one point and it's just a joy to watch.
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You're probably wondering what she actually looks like, here you go:
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Yep, self-hating white girl.
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This one was fucking gold, she retweets a Dr Seuss account telling you who to vote for.
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Whiteknighting for Star Wars and other autism. Cow crossovers with Kyle and Blob are all too common, along with my BFF Maryne:
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It's amazing how she retweets a comic about rape, when she runs zero risk of ever getting laid.

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Unfortunately there's not a lot of tardcum from her, just basic bitch politics from TGWTG reject and reviewing children's media really badly. She's one of those cows you'll have to invest in to actually get something out of it, unless you're watching her videos (and let's be honest, you aren't).

We at least have truly awful, wanky fan art:
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Lolcow links
Youtube - live, archive.
Tumblr - live, archive.
Twitter - live, archive.

Archive links provided by @Valiant.
 
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RodgerDodger

True & Honest Fan
Of all the critics to copy, why the hell would you copy Movieblob? I could understand Jontron or Somecallmejohnny, but why Blob? He's so bad at reviewing movies so why anyone would pick him as their influence is stunning to me.

Also that black guy is totally rocking the :suffering: face

I'm thinking she roofied him when his back was turned. He was probably the town water meter reader who wandered to close to her secret lair and wham!
 

Replicant Sasquatch

Do Lolcows Dream of Electric Hedgehog Pokemon?
Of all the critics to copy, why the hell would you copy Movieblob? I could understand Jontron or Somecallmejohnny, but why Blob? He's so bad at reviewing movies so why anyone would pick him as their influence is stunning to me.

Also that black guy is totally rocking the :suffering: face

Matey Potatey actually maintains quite the following. His persona is the "intellectually honest" reviewer who isn't swept up in popular sentiment. This is pretty powerful stuff for easily-swayed contrarian faggots who are more interested in looking cool than actually enjoying anything. The irony of course being he and all of his orbiters (as in they literally orbit his mass) are the most obvious kind of pop culture junkies.

Plus he's a Trump a-log which will always score you points.
 

FluffyTehFennekin

Good girl, M. a. a. D. Fennec
Rise from your grave!
Sorry, I just wanted to say I was subscribed to her channel way back then, I let her squeeking over Korrasami slide but then she began sperging about people not liking nuShe-Ra because she is not "oversexualized" like in the old show.
Finally a necro! I personally think this cow’s got a milk left in her. I mean the fact that she creams her pants whenever a cartoon or animated film does something “woke” kinda speaks a lot about her image.
 
Finally a necro! I personally think this cow’s got a milk left in her. I mean the fact that she creams her pants whenever a cartoon or animated film does something “woke” kinda speaks a lot about her image.
I didn't mind her in bronies reacting to stuff, for the most part her reviews seemed OK but then the wokeness caught on, I used to think most bronies would be SJWs but apparently they are mostly neutral considering it was Hasbro pulling the strings in a lot of stupid controversies like Derpy, as for this one I wouldn't know much more since I just decided to stop following her.
 

White Devil

As in this world there are degrees of evils
Rise from your grave!
Sorry, I just wanted to say I was subscribed to her channel way back then, I let her squeeking over Korrasami slide but then she began sperging about people not liking nuShe-Ra because she is not "oversexualized" like in the old show.

How in the fuck was oldschool She-Ra sexualized? That blows my fucking mind, if anything she was a role model to young girls (much like Princess Leia) that they can fight like boys can too.

The new She-Ra is some tranny trap garbage that should have never been made.
 

Absolutego

Middleman who didn't do diddly
True & Honest Fan
How in the fuck was oldschool She-Ra sexualized? That blows my fucking mind, if anything she was a role model to young girls (much like Princess Leia) that they can fight like boys can too.

The new She-Ra is some tranny trap garbage that should have never been made.
They drew a cleavage line on her bust and she wore a short skirt. And Leia's on these people's shit list for the slave bikini anyways.
It will never not be funny how the generation with such hatred for American Evangelicals became literally the exact same type of people as they aged.
 

White Devil

As in this world there are degrees of evils
They drew a cleavage line on her bust and she wore a short skirt. And Leia's on these people's shit list for the slave bikini anyways.
It will never not be funny how these asshats turned into exactly the soccer moms/church ladies they always lambasted their parents for being.

So She-Ra shouldn't have breasts and be able to move efficiently? What?

Carrie Fisher was on record for two decades saying how much she hated that bikini. But nevermind that neither the character or the actress had any agency in that at all and still managed to murder one of the biggest crime lords in the galaxy in it...


You're right though, these mental defectives are unable to find joy in anything except trying to arbitrate what is proper for others to consume and think.
 
How in the fuck was oldschool She-Ra sexualized? That blows my fucking mind, if anything she was a role model to young girls (much like Princess Leia) that they can fight like boys can too.

The new She-Ra is some tranny trap garbage that should have never been made.
You can find her review where she basically says people just don't like nuShe-Ra because they can't fap to her.
 

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