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- Mar 7, 2020
List of Chloe's vids, with archives (work in progress)
Chloe Wilkinson is a British YouTuber malingering as a Dissociative Identity Disorder sufferer in order to live out her DDLG fantasies with her non-binary lover 'Nan'. Over the last few months they've posted countless videos of themselves spazzing out on camera, roleplaying as children, and LARPing as their edgy OCs. Nan is attempting to raise money for a visa in order to move in with Chloe and build an ebegging empire on the backs of gullible tweens.
There is an existing thread on the DID community as a whole here that hasn't seen an update in a while. OP covered some of the big players and terminology used without really touching on Chloe and co. It's an informative thread and saves me a little time in explaining what DID supposedly is.
CHLOE WILKINSON AKA NIN / DISSOCIADID
Chloe Wilkinson is a twenty-three year old woman from Manningtree, Essex. She started her channel DissociaDID in March 2018 and claims to have 22 personalities at the last count.
Notable examples are 'Nadia', a Native American witch who lives inside a white English girl, 'Omega' a literal fucking ghost, multiple 'littles' or child alters, and several men who all speak in the same accent and wear chemo beanies - except 'Gregory' who sounds like a little girl and describes himself as a balding anorexic Asian in his mid-forties with social anxiety.
Many have noted inconsistencies in Chloe's DID story. She can't decide when she first learned about DID, when she was diagnosed, or by whom. There is evidence to suggest that she was self-diagnosed and researched symptoms in order to get her official diagnosis. I'll cover that in a moment.
In the video above, Chloe claims she met with a mental health crisis team after a suicide attempt at 18. At this stage in her life, Chloe would have been in her last year at sixth form in Colchester. When questioned over whether she heard voices, Chloe described an 'internal monologue' that occasionally got angry with her. The mental health team told her that this was abnormal. Chloe was referred for therapy. In the meantime, the 'voices' in her internal monologue became stronger and self aware.
After spending a few months in therapy Chloe claims that her therapist 'suggested' she had DID. She is quick to point out that this was not an official diagnosis. After this conversation, Chloe repressed the thought and her voices calmed down. She continued with her life as normal.
Later, she moved away from home to study Psychology (lmao) at the University of East Anglia. Shortly after moving, her grandfather died and her partner ended their relationship. Chloe states that she began to experience blackouts which led to her missing class. She claims she was threatened with expulsion and told she was 'not fit to study' by her school. The stress of this situation prompted four suicide attempts, after which Chloe claims she was expelled.
She then claims that she moved back home and joined support groups on Facebook as she decided that she needed help. She states that she started raising money to see a doctor who specialised in DID and that after evaluation she was officially diagnosed.
There are some problems with this story.
Here is an article about a fundraiser Chloe launched to raise money for her DID treatment. The article describes Chloe as a current student who is taking a break from her studies. There is no mention of expulsion. She seems to have voluntarily taken a break due to her mental health.
Here is the GoFundMe itself. Chloe raised £1000. Despite claiming to have received treatment in her videos she did not return to her studies. Seems like easy ebegger coin to me.
Here is a Twitter thread from December 2019 in which she doubles down on the narrative that she was expelled and 'robbed' of her education. Incidentally, she also claims to have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. This is a condition she has brought up a handful of times on her YouTube channel. It rarely seems to affect her. Chloe also claims to walk with a cane. I can't find a single video where she does but it's very disabled chic.
Initially, Chloe claims that her first therapist was the one to 'suggest' that she might have DID. However, in the above livestream at 44:03, Chloe mentions that the same therapist 'in Colchester' where she lived during sixth form knew nothing about DID and only educated herself after Chloe raised the subject herself. So, who really introduced her to the concept of DID?
In the same video, Chloe also claims that she met with this therapist prior to leaving university, conflicting with her claim that she was officially diagnosed after she was expelled. Her timeline of events is at least consistently inconsistent.
Two sources above claim to have gone to the same university and both dispute Chloe's claim that she was expelled.
Under the Equality Act 2010 it is illegal to discriminate against the mentally ill in the UK. Service providers like universities are also required to make reasonable adjustments for the mentally ill in order to accommodate them. It makes it fairly unlikely that Chloe was actually expelled due to mental illness.
Whilst still based in Norwich where she went to university Chloe was already using the DissociaDID name, as seen here. This fundraiser was made shortly after she started her YouTube channel. It seems she was waiting for her channel to take off before entirely cutting ties with university.
In the above video, Chloe invites a friend of ten years Anna to participate in a Q&A. Anna claims that Chloe first mentioned her DID when she was in sixth form. Sixth form students are between 16 and 18 which leaves a small window of time for her suicide attempt, months of therapy, and the 'suggestion' of a diagnosis if you buy her first account where the 'suggestion' was made to her at 18.
Anna also claims that she spotted symptoms of DID in Chloe when they were both at university when she began acting like a child. So again it seems like Chloe was claiming to have DID long before her official diagnosis and tried to cover that up in her first account.
In Feb 2019 Chloe wrote this article titled 'A Defence of Self-Diagnosis'. Though she eventually admits that self-diagnosis cannot be a substitute for an official diagnosis she makes it clear that she sympathises with self-diagnosis. You can read it in full, but it essentially rambles about how the NHS has long waiting lists and with private treatment you can get a diagnosis much faster. She claims that the NHS harbour stigma against DID and the entire article is her covertly admitting that she self-diagnosed but it's fine because she got an official diagnosis later.
Chloe has also been known to give her audience tips on the best ways to secure a diagnosis. She suggests feigning ignorance and referring to the condition as the outdated Multiple Personality Disorder rather than using the up to date DID to stop a doctor from spotting trend hoppers. She also suggests that people should pretend to be skeptical about the existence of DID to be extra convincing.
ATTENTION SEEKING 101
Chloe frequently makes use of clickbait reportedly admitting to doing so to 'raise awareness'. This playlist created by Chloe is dedicated to the videos where she 'switches' on camera which is essentially all of them, though at the time of posting there are only eighteen videos in the list.
The way she acts out switching is always melodramatic and rarely convincing. She incorporates a lot of stuttering, mumbling, and extreme blinking, nailing the freshly lobotomised look. See below.
I find it bizarre how she'll usually break into the biggest smile afterwards. It seems like she wants to laugh at herself but plays it off with a 'smiley alter' instead. Occasionally, she 'switches' as a result of a trigger whilst other times she claims she has the ability to call forward an alter and switch at will.
None of Chloe's 'alters' seem to experience the amnesia associated with DID when they switch in. She usually excuses this by explaining that she was 'co-conscious' but can't remain consistent or convincing with that excuse either.
Occasionally, we see a brief glimpse of poorly acted surprise, but the 'alter' who has supposedly just found themselves in an unexpected location with no memory of getting there handles it remarkably well. The alter usually picks up where Chloe left off without protesting about the camera pointing at them during what is presumably a stressful time. After all, don't alters appear after triggers?
Chloe has a habit of abruptly ending a video and posting another exactly where she left off when she could have simply edited the clips together in an attempt to maximise engagement. We see this most often with her livestreams which always seem to 'glitch'. This gives her an excuse to post her streams as three separate videos for maximum engagement.
At 8:17 Chloe is in the middle of answering a two-part question from an old school friend when she begins to 'dissociate'. Just as things reach a peak she inserts an ad.
Someone in her comment section asked why she posted an ad at the moment. Chloe insisted that she had no control over where the ad was placed but when another commenter corrected her she went on to guilt trip her (at the time) 100 subs by whining about how the money she made from YouTube ads was feeding her. At 100 subs? Doubtful.
Anyway, after the ad break, we've got another minute of awkward mumbling, chuckling, and verbal reminders that she is in the process of switching. Eventually, she laughs and introduces herself as Nadia, a seventeen year old Native American, who is utterly indistinguishable from Chloe. 'Nadia' claims that she wanted to say hello to the old school friend. She rambles for a while about her memories from school, before turning off the camera for absolutely no reason.
For monetary and attention seeking reasons, instead of switching the camera back on and editing the clips together, Chloe posted this second much longer video later that day titled "How I Found Out I Have Dissociative Identity Disorder... | Q&A Pt2" where she picks up exactly where she left off in the previous video before 'Nadia arrives'.
Chloe claims that she doesn't remember switching, she doesn't know what happened during her switch, and she doesn't know if another alter emerged or if the camera just 'timed out'. She claims that she came around and found the camera was switched off with no memory of what happened. Despite 'not remembering' she continues to answer the second part of the question from the previous video, showing absolutely no signs of the amnesia she had just claimed to suffer from.
In terms of ebegging activity, Chloe promotes her Ko-Fi link in every video description. She also frequently promotes her Patreon. At the time of posting, she has 659 Patreons. She also has a merch store in case you wanted to buy her graphic design is my passion mugs.
'LITTLES' AKA CHILD ALTERS / CHLOE WILKINSON HAS A DDLG KINK
Our Littles | Dissociative Identity Disorder | Switch On Camera
Further drama has been created by Chloe around her 'child alters'. She calls them 'littles' and insists that she will never share any information about her littles or even show her littles on camera in order to 'protect them'. In the video above Chloe switches out into her SuPeR ScArY alter Jade who rants that 'littles' are real children and very vulnerable.
(As a side note, the green hair and eyeshadow make her yellowing teeth impossible to ignore in this video.)
'Jade' claims that if the names of the 'littles' are shared online abusers will target them because pedophiles are clamouring for the opportunity to molest a twenty-three year old woman with a lisp. In this video, 'Jade' also talks about how much she dislikes being on YouTube but doesn't forget to advertise her own 'meet the alters' video.
Despite the claims that 'littles' will be 'protected' Chloe can't seem to stay consistent.
In the video above, the names of some 'littles' are visible through the page of her diary at 6:32. Commenters have tried to make her aware but despite engaging with every other comment, Chloe chooses to ignore them. For those interested, the visible names are 'Laura' or 'Lauren' and 'Sarah'. A third name is semi-visible and could be 'Zoe' but I don't care enough to analyse that closely. It starts with a Z though.
At 5:20 when unwrapping gifts a 'little' appears. We get that bizarre high pitched lisp while Chloe paws at a glittery toy in full sperg mode. She 'switches' back a moment later and gets defensive about the 'little' appearing but still includes the clip rather than editing it out.
Unrelated to 'littles' but in the same video at 33:03 'Omega' the ghost alter switches in. She opens a letter she describes as a 'Christian recruitment leaflet' with 'graphic and bloody imagery and threatening language'. Chloe puts text on screen saying 'we stopped here, may upload in future'. She didn't stop. She fades back in on a close up of 'Omega' the friendly ghost crying about religion.
In this interview which I'll cover in more depth later, Chloe throws out her no littles rule entirely. At 23:21 we cut to an extreme close up of Chloe gurning at the camera before a little emerges and after an attempt at cutesy rambling she promptly bursts into tears. One half of Smosh nods sympathetically and sits with her until she stops crying and switches back to Chloe. Lots of weird lip sucking, bouncing up and down, and drawn out "mhmmm!" sounds until she 'switches back'. I'll cover the rest of that video in a moment but she 'switches' three times in that interview. The other participants don't switch once despite being equally as spergy.
The first tier on her patreon is also some pedobait called 'little love' with the description: "You know how much our littles mean to us. Give a little support, gain a lot of love! <3"
NAN ZUNIGA AKA TEAM PIÑATA
I'm going to divert from Chloe to discuss her fiancé 'Nan' Zuniga for a moment. I refuse to believe that anyone would actually name their child 'Nan' but I'm not invested enough in her to confirm. She is a thirty year old woman who 'identifies' as twenty-three. She's also non-binary and talks about her struggles to be accepted at some barber shop as a result of her identity in this article which gives you a little background information.
She created the channel TeamPinata in September 2017 and claims to have 17 personalities. She studied art at San Fransisco State University before returning to Missouri where she now makes a living malingering online. Nan 'co-hosts' with an alter called Jeremy who is an 'age-slider'. Lots of child fetishist red flags with this one but 'Jeremy' identifies as anywhere between a toddler and 27 year old man.
Jeremy also identifies as Canadian. Her attempt at a Canadian accent when performing as Jeremy is one of the strangest things I've ever heard. See below.
REMEMBERING NEW TRAUMA MEMORIES :: A Message From Little Jeremy
Anyway, I know a little less about Nan, but someone claiming to be her former boyfriend had this to say:
Nan is a pretty standard ebegger. She links to her Ko-Fi page in the description of every video, encouraging viewers to donate in order to fund her visa. She also sells merch.
THE UNLIKELY BUT MUTUALLY BENEFICIAL LOVE STORY OF CHLOE AND NAN
In November 2018, Chloe and Nan started a long-distance relationship after meeting online. In May 2019, Chloe went live with the above video titled 'Meet Our PARTNER SYSTEM'. Nan is dressed like a little boy and the whole video is a competition in rctardation. Ever since, the content on their channels has mostly centred around their relationship. I couldn't begin to analyse all of it but here are two of my favourites.
Essentially, Chloe and Nan visit Disney World. Predictably, they slip into roleplaying as toddlers, complete with gurning, mute pointing, and baby-talk gibberish. At one point, Chloe starts openly crying. At 18:17, Nan and Chloe have a bizarre discussion about their desire to have the body of a child. Chloe goes on to describe an interaction with a real child, rambling in a pedo-bait soprano whilst Nan attempts to say something profound. At 19:25, Chloe proudly admits that one woman was so concerned about her that she bought her a bottle of water and tried to intervene. If you have 25 minutes to spare, skim through.
NON-HUMAN ALTER DOES MY MAKEUP | Switch Caught On Camera | Dissociative Identity Disorder
'Riven' a 'were cat' croaks through a make-up tutorial. At 5:55 Chloe can't tolerate the accent for much longer and starts openly laughing. She tries to play it off by adopting an accent herself, before pretending to switch to a male alter with an equally bad accent at 6:26. Cue Chloe and Nan riffing unintelligible nonsense back and forth in increasingly hard to maintain accents. It's unbearable, and throughout this exchange, Nan is smearing black powder across Chloe's face for an added element of fucking weird. Chloe also admits she has a sexual relationship with Riven the teenage werecat.
CHLOE AND NAN MURDER THEIR IMAGINARY FRIENDS FOR VIEWS
Nan and Chloe have gone on to invent a number of relationships between alters in their systems. The first of note was between 'Nadia', Chloe's alter, and 'Leslie' Nan's alter. It wasn't built to last. Nadia and Leslie appeared briefly in a handful of videos before Leslie just fucking died.
In August 2019, Nan posted the above video. She claimed that 'Leslie' and another alter 'Ace' had 'integrated' to form 'Lacy'. She did not mean that they had integrated in the clinical sense. Instead, she meant that the two personalities had essentially died and merged to form one new personality with the best of both worlds. This was a big disappointment for the tween fans who were invested in diverse lesbian lovers Nadia and Leslie. People grieved. Honestly, the video isn't worth me downloading but it's linked above while it's live.
INTEGRATION, LOVE & LOSS. | THE REALITY | Dissociative Identity Disorder
In September 2019, Chloe posted the above video claiming that Nadia was in a relationship with the animated corpse of her former lesbian lover who now uses the name Lacy. Avoid the video if you can't stomach two handicaps molesting each other.
HOW INTEGRATION WORKS. A GEM FUSION? All About Alters 7 | Dissociative Identity Disorder
In October 2019, Chloe posted the above. She claimed to have integrated with 'Nina' a 'sexual alter'. You can briefly see 'Nina' here at 16:16 but I can summarise it easily enough. She wears a shirt that screams TITS.
ANOTHER ALTER INTEGRATION?! :: Seth + Evan = RIVEN
With perfect dramatic timing, Nan had another integration too. Incidentally, Riven's accent is pretty fucking weird- head to 1:05 in the video above for details.
For a few months Chloe and Nan competed to see who could kill off their OCs the fastest while introducing new diverse characters for their audience to jerk to. Chloe decided to rename herself 'Nin' and described a spiritual dream in which she dropped her clothes and walked into the void, waking up and simply knowing she was now Nin. She describes that in the 'How Integration Works' video above.
After months of relationship turmoil centred around character deaths, fans were left with Nin and Nan...
NIN AND NAN GET ENGAGED IN A HOTEL FUCKING LOBBY
#PiñaDID IS ENGAGED!!?? :: Nan Proposes to Nin
On January 9 2020, Nan posted this engagement video.
Nan explains that she is planing on secretly proposing to 'Nin' who I'll continue to refer to as Chloe for the sake of ease. Nan stresses the fact that this is a secret and Chloe does not know. Skip to 3:35 however, and Nan, acting as 'Jeremy' is seen telling Chloe, who is acting as 'Kyle', that he plans to propose. Chloe as 'Kyle' discusses her own surprise proposal, and later even has the balls to act surprised when she's pretending to be Nin again. You cannot write this stuff.
'Jeremy' and 'Kyle' are now in a relationship. During their conversation, 'Kyle' who identifies as a 19 year old man, watches as his boyfriend 'Jeremy' 'age-slides' from 24 years old down to a toddler. 'Kyle' stoically humours his toddler boyfriend as they further discuss the upcoming proposal.
The rest of the video is taken up with Nan 'cutely' pretending to propose before asking another question instead. A drawn out scene of Nan and Chloe pretending to be children in a hotel bed is particularly disturbing. Finally, at 10:20 Nan proposes in what looks like the lobby of a budget hotel. It is the most underwhelming proposal I've ever seen. Ten months after meeting in person, Chloe and Nan are finally engaged. It's definitely not for visa reasons.
FOR SOME REASON SMOSH GOT INVOLVED
On 4th March 2020, Anthony Padilla posted the above interview featuring Chloe to his 3.9 million subscribers. Three DID sufferers took part, including Chloe.. The video made it to the YouTube trending page and at the time of posting has 1.3 million views.
The other participants were as bizarre as expected. Amanda, a middle aged horse, spent two minutes gushing about an alter she describes as 'eternal'. in age She repeatedly insisted that her alter is 'really cool' so forcefully Padilla actually looks concerned for his safety.
Redwood is the second participant, a typical non-passing tranny with a passing resemblance to a hammerhead shark. Both are bizarre... but neither choose to switch on camera.
Chloe, on the other hand, switches three times during her interview. At 17:06 she begins to cover her face, shift in her seat and whine. Padilla awkwardly offers her a break but Chloe side steps the offer. She pulls out her lobotomy face and stares into space for a minute, seriously disturbing Padilla. Just as he seems about to call cut, she snaps out of her trance and introduces herself as Kyle. She then throws a tantrum about coming around wearing a skirt. In the next shot, her hair is tied back and some poor PA has put their coat over her lap to hide her skirt because 'Kyle' and his big big dick are shy.
At 22:50 we've got more shots of Chloe looking like she's bearing down and struggling. At 23:23 her "little" emerges. I've covered that above. She ends up crying and apologising for being "too small" as every child does at some point during the day. At 26:21 she switches back to Chloe, unconvincingly asking "what happened?"
So, that leads me up to the present day. I didn't cover everything as there are hundreds of videos on both of their channels, but I hit on the most interesting points in my opinion.
Chloe has gained a few thousand followers since Padilla posted his video and the number keeps growing. She's also planning on attending a DID conference in November 2020 where a number of other DID YouTubers are speaking. Tickets go all the way up to $320.
She's also currently beefing with Trisha Paytas who is now claiming to have DID. Nothing revolutionary there.
Anyway, this is a developing situation and I'm interested to see where it goes.
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