Chris after Barb -

[PolterBob]

From what I know, Chris won't be allowed to get Section 8 or other forms of housing assistance because of the fact that he is now a convicted felon. There are background checks for past criminal records they run to try to keep the riffraff out, and there's no amount of "blaming the trolls" excuses Chris can make for his own court record.

In other words, no Section 8, public housing, or halfway house for Chris. It's gonna be 14BLC till it gets condemned or seized, and then it's the highway overpass for him.

 

[CatParty]

From what I know, Chris won't be allowed to get Section 8 or other forms of housing assistance because of the fact that he is now a convicted felon. There are background checks for past criminal records they run to try to keep the riffraff out, and there's no amount of "blaming the trolls" excuses Chris can make for his own court record.

In other words, no Section 8, public housing, or halfway house for Chris. It's gonna be 14BLC till it gets condemned or seized, and then it's the highway overpass for him.

he's pretty much f'ed. he is not prepared at all for when barb goes. no one in his life has prepared him for a life completely on his own. there's no way he'll get carted to a home. he's stuck with the horde. he'll screw it up somehow and then he's either going to prison or ironically hiding under a bridge.

 

[Tubular Monkey]

He is not a convicted felon. Snyder didn't pursue felony charges. Synder did him a huge favor, but Chris is too stupid to realize that.

 

[Henry Bemis]

He is not a convicted felon. Snyder didn't pursue felony charges. Synder did him a huge favor, but Chris is too stupid to realize that.

At least he won't be, come July. Provided Chris doesn't get into any more scrapes, the charges will be reduced to misdemeanors.

 

[Bgheff]

Clearly, we need to bring back the poster campaign before then so he doesn't get off the hook.

 

[Tubular Monkey]

Clearly, we need to bring back the poster campaign before then so he doesn't get off the hook.

The skywriter will be available again after St. Patrick's Day.

 

[PolterBob]

He is not a convicted felon. Snyder didn't pursue felony charges. Synder did him a huge favor, but Chris is too stupid to realize that.

Those felony charges (grand jury and all) are on Chris' arrest record. Section 8 will spot that when they do a background check.

And besides, knowing how Chris conducts himself, he'd be sure to get evicted within a year of whatever place he ends up "living" in. Despite his apartment days away from the grasp of the Greene County School Board Illuminati, he's not going to be a very popular chap in whatever complex he gets moved to.

Just waiting for the first person at his apartment block to yell "JULAYYYYY!" and Chris totally losing his shit right there on the spot.

PS: Getting evicted from Section 8 or public housing also gets you blackballed from getting any public rent assistance for at least 5 years. Chris would never survive 5 years paying full rent on his tugboat income.

 

[CWCissey]

He is not a convicted felon. Snyder didn't pursue felony charges. Synder did him a huge favor, but Chris is too stupid to realize that.

Those felony charges (grand jury and all) are on Chris' arrest record. Section 8 will spot that when they do a background check.

And besides, knowing how Chris conducts himself, he'd be sure to get evicted within a year of whatever place he ends up "living" in. Despite his apartment days away from the grasp of the Greene County School Board Illuminati, he's not going to be a very popular chap in whatever complex he gets moved to.

Just waiting for the first person at his apartment block to yell "JULAYYYYY!" and Chris totally losing his shit right there on the spot.

PS: Getting evicted from Section 8 or public housing also gets you blackballed from getting any public rent assistance for at least 5 years. Chris would never survive 5 years paying full rent on his tugboat income.

What felony charges? It was an arraignment not a trial.

 

[Stratochu]

After the power gets shut off, he'll probably sell some of Barb's stuff to get enough money to make the Aerostar run again and to get it towed to a garage. He'll probably live in it with some of his things in it (probably the laptop, the iPhones, the PS Vita, the DS, the PSP, a Game Boy or two, his Sonic and Pikachu plushies, a box of Legos under the backseat, some clothes and his bedding, maybe random other things) in Richmond, albeit heartbroken that it was no longer like his high-school days. 14BC would be abandoned and eventually seized by tax officials. He would mooch off of wi-fi and hit on women, but not get in trouble again. He would die of carbon-monoxide poisoning aggravated by diabetes and heart disease after the by then nearly 30-year-old, beaten to shit and rusty minivan had an exhaust leak under a hole in the floor and he was running it for the dome light and heater before he went to sleep.

 

[Saney]

Clearly, we need to bring back the poster campaign before then so he doesn't get off the hook.

The skywriter will be available again after St. Patrick's Day.

Oooh, do we get to wear pickle suits again?

 

[LordCustos3]

Just spitballing here.

From what I know, Chris won't be allowed to get Section 8...

I know. I know. What I'm about to refer to is a different 'Section 8', but bear with me.
Maybe Da Chris'tard overheard someone discussing 'Section 8' regarding what life would be for him after Barb was gone, and that it was reaaaaalllllly important he gets one of these 'Section 8's....and the only other place Our Pet Lolcow ever heard the phrase "'Section 8'" was on Reruns of M*A*S*H.

Maybe it wasn't a Clyde Cash wannabe that put all this Tomgirl stuff in his head.
Maybe the idea came from Maxwell Q. Klinger.
Da Chris'tard cross-dresses because he thinks cross-dressing will get him a 'Section 8', just like Klinger.

 

[JarlaxleBaenre]

I suggest an underground army of disenfranchised workers from 4-Cent Garbage, if you can't think of anything better than revisiting the poster campaign.

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

and then he's either going to prison or ironically hiding under a bridge.

You mean like a... TROLL??

 

[CatParty]

and then he's either going to prison or ironically hiding under a bridge.

You mean like a... TROLL??

Bingo.

 

[mendoza]

Re: Just spitballing here.

From what I know, Chris won't be allowed to get Section 8...

I know. I know. What I'm about to refer to is a different 'Section 8', but bear with me.
Maybe Da Chris'tard overheard someone discussing 'Section 8' regarding what life would be for him after Barb was gone, and that it was reaaaaalllllly important he gets one of these 'Section 8's....and the only other place Our Pet Lolcow ever heard the phrase "'Section 8'" was on Reruns of M*A*S*H.

Maybe it wasn't a Clyde Cash wannabe that put all this Tomgirl stuff in his head.
Maybe the idea came from Maxwell Q. Klinger.
Da Chris'tard cross-dresses because he thinks cross-dressing will get him a 'Section 8', just like Klinger.

OMGBJ!!!

Suddenly it all makes sense!!!

Great job putting that together, LordCustos!

 

[drmccoy]

It will all slide quite quickly. Nobody has ever trained him in the responsibilities of being an adult. He doesn't even know 1/4 of the things he will need to do. Unless somebody helps him, everything is going to get flushed down the drain quickly.

 

[CatParty]

It will all slide quite quickly. Nobody has ever trained him in the responsibilities of being an adult. He doesn't even know 1/4 of the things he will need to do. Unless somebody helps him, everything is going to get flushed down the drain quickly.

there is only so much pestering rocky will be able to handle

 

[drmccoy]

It will all slide quite quickly. Nobody has ever trained him in the responsibilities of being an adult. He doesn't even know 1/4 of the things he will need to do. Unless somebody helps him, everything is going to get flushed down the drain quickly.

there is only so much pestering rocky will be able to handle

Exactly, he'll be on the phone with her to tackle even the most basic tasks of home ownership. I am quite sure he has zero clue of the amount of work needed to keep current on both the house and the car.

 

[CatParty]

It will all slide quite quickly. Nobody has ever trained him in the responsibilities of being an adult. He doesn't even know 1/4 of the things he will need to do. Unless somebody helps him, everything is going to get flushed down the drain quickly.

there is only so much pestering rocky will be able to handle

Exactly, he'll be on the phone with her to tackle even the most basic tasks of home ownership. I am quite sure he has zero clue of the amount of work needed to keep current on both the house and the car.

instead of barb filling up the house around her, he'll be letting the house fall down around him

 

[mendoza]

It may fall down around them while Barb is still around.

How much work do you think Bob was able to do to it in his last years?

How much do you think Barb is willing or able to do to it now?

In a perfect world, she would cattle prod Chris into learning how and doing some likely needed basic maintenance tasks to keep that from happening, and at least then he would know what to do when she is gone.

Of course, to paraphrase that old Wal-Greens commercial, 14 Branchland Court is about as far from Perfect as it gets.