Chris and his libido -

[BigBoss]

Pre-hooker, it was a given that Chris would do anything to get his hands on some dykes and china.

Would you say that post-hooker Chris's sex drive has gone exponentially down, and thus has drastically made him less eager to get a "sweetheart?"

If so why? If not, well, why not?

 

[MysticMisty]

I don't think his libido was great to begin with. I think he admitted once to masturbating a few times a week some years ago. Given that he didn't even start masturbating until his late teens I don't think there was much going on down there.

 

[CatParty]

His duck hungers for tom-tom to pound.

 

[KatsuKitty]

Chris was probably more interested in passing the virgin-breaker milestone than he was in actually having sex.

 

[Grand Number of Pounds]

^Yup.

Just like alcohol, he thought it would make him a big boy. He got some pleasure out of it, then went back to playing vidya with not much else in his life changing.

Chris doesn't want to spend money on another hooker, so he'll likely not have sex again for awhile. Then again, sex is a Backpages email and a gift basket away.

His low libido is probably the result of his unhealthy lifestyle. He might as well be eating saltpeter.

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

Chris was more excited about sex due to his warped views fueled by media consumption. He thought it'd work exactly like a porno while having some kind of emotional life-changing impact like in movies. I think the latter was the biggest draw. It was a milestone he thought would lead to a transformation in his life. So now he's getting older and his sex drive will probably get weaker. Depression is probably having the biggest impact right now.

 

[BigAltheGreat921]

For someone with a supposedly weak sex drive it's amazing how most of his sex acts were pretty extreme. I mean, in some ways, Chris is/was an amateur pornographer.

 

[Marvin]

Chris was probably more interested in passing the virgin-breaker milestone than he was in actually having sex.

Eh, not really.

Like, if that was the case, he probably only would've had sex once. Really, I think the current theory that has strongest presence in my mind is the "bitch list theory." Chris has a list of problems to bitch to people about. He'll bitch to Rocky about the trolls and how he has to take care of his mother and the dogs and how he's all alone and doesn't have a girlfriend. Before he lost his virginity, being a frustrated virgin was on that list. He constantly thought about sex and girls and his virginity, so that obviously contributed to it. He both thought and talked about it a lot, for a few reasons.

Now, since he's not a virgin, he doesn't think about it much. He still has sexual thoughts and probably partakes of pornography occasionally, but not as frequently as he did before. It's not really on his mind as much.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Like, if that was the case, he probably only would've had sex once.

What, are you saying he's done it more than once? Gone back to send the Navy into the Cherokee longhouse again?

In general this seems to be a pattern with him though: doing anything once is enough to satisfy his ego.

 

[Hyperion]

I think Chris's problem is he doesn't know what to think of his low libido. Since he thinks he's supposed to be constantly aroused by any woman he sees (I AM STRAIGHT), and I don't think he can even identify what gender someone is without some thought. This may be the source of his supposed "ducks on the mind" malady that makes him suspect homosexual psychic sabotage.

Who wants to bet that he actually asked the prossie "You are a woman?" before he plunged his bent duck into her charges by the hour china?

 

[Batman VS Tony Danza]

Wait, what? Chris has had sex more than once?

...

With like... a person, right?

 

[Tubular Monkey]

Like, if that was the case, he probably only would've had sex once.

Dammit, Marvin.

 

[Male]

Silly Marvin, his PS3 doesn't count.

 

[pickleniggo]

Perhaps Marvin meant "woudl've onlt had sex once and then dropped the subject entirely".
I still have no idea how he managed to do it with his bent duck without it being painful for him or the pro.

 

[3Yikes]

Just becasue his duck is bent (we don't even know if it got like that form an injury), doens't at all mena that it would be painful. But my duck ins't bent, so what do I know.

 

[Marvin]

Just becasue his duck is bent (we don't even know if it got like that form an injury), doens't at all mena that it would be painful. But my duck ins't bent, so what do I know.

Eh, dicks vary, sometimes with curves. You have to have a really serious curve to get into abnormal levels. Chris' is probably within the normal range. It's funny to make fun of, but it probably isn't abnormal or anything.

Well what probably happened was he realized sex isn't as awesome and life-changing as he thought, so he's not as obsessed with it now. At the back of his mind he probably thought that after losing his virginity he would become somewhat normal.

I really think it's that he's not talking about it as much anymore. Bitching about how awful his life is because of X is probably the biggest reason something sticks in Chris' mind.

 

[milkshark]

One of the most personally frustrating aspects of Chris' life is how he interprets stories from movies and TV shows as completely realistic. Chris learns about the world from his TV mostly, and his adult persona is made up of adult swim references, vague caricatures of men from commercials and video game stereotypes. Chris has probably seen plenty of shows or movies that deal with sexual virginity, and they're usually painting the virgin as a loser, inexperienced and missing out on everything. Rather than having any sense of self worth, Chris had decided that virginity was his cross to bear until he could find someone to take it from him. What's funny to me is that he had all these conditions for a girlfriend including ethnic background and average intelligence, but felt a prostitute is an acceptable way to begin his sexual history. Most girls I know wouldn't willingly date or hook up with a guy who they know to frequent hookers. This didn't bother Chris though, he broadcasted it to the world. No doubt he was disappointed in the experience, as I'm sure he thought there were Playboy bunnies just waiting for him on the Backpage. I imagine he had his first time with someone who looked like a cleaning lady. Considering Chris has a thing for familiarity, comfort and pleasure with minimal effort, he'll probably be devoting a portion of his tugboat to a friendly, understanding hooker for years to come. Realistically this is the only way that Chris can continue having any sort of sex life that isn't just him masturbating alone in his childhood bedroom.

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

Eh, dicks vary, sometimes with curves. You have to have a really serious curve to get into abnormal levels. Chris' is probably within the normal range. It's funny to make fun of, but it probably isn't abnormal or anything.

His dick isn't curved, though. It's bent, like it's been pinched or somehow mangled. I know talk is frowned upon, so let's leave it at that.

Chris' libido has always been low; he didn't start fapping until he was 16, and only because he saw some soft-core skinemax flick.

I think Chris was/is interested in sex only for the social "bragging rights". He was never interested in the physical sensation or emotional connection.

 

[BigBoss]

I think that the recent leak proves that his libido is higher than we suspected, but still relatively low.

 

[Marvin]

Eh, dicks vary, sometimes with curves. You have to have a really serious curve to get into abnormal levels. Chris' is probably within the normal range. It's funny to make fun of, but it probably isn't abnormal or anything.

His dick isn't curved, though. It's bent, like it's been pinched or somehow mangled. I know talk is frowned upon, so let's leave it at that.

That's still within range of normal variations.

Chris' libido has always been low; he didn't start fapping until he was 16, and only because he saw some soft-core skinemax flick.

I think Chris was/is interested in sex only for the social "bragging rights". He was never interested in the physical sensation or emotional connection.

Eh, he was though. Chris enjoys masturbation and pornography. Hell, that's where probably all of his perceptions about nude women comes from (such as Megan having a landing strip in ShecameforCWC) and his perceptions about sex come from. Like, maybe this is just me, but really, aside from fetishists, who the fuck is actually into titfucking? That has always seemed like a weird porn thing to me, instead of something people usually got into on their own.

I don't know how much of the recent facebook leak you've read, but Chris is into sex, to some extent. Chris really doesn't care about impressing the world or living up to expectations, for the most part.