Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7/14 -

[AtroposHeart]

Christian Weston Chandler


Very Depressed.
Need In-Person,
Real Compassion
From Women.
Hugs and Love.
Please Help. — feeling sad.

 

[Kosher Dill]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

"HELP!!! HELP!!! HELP!!!"

Posted from Ruckersville McDonalds

 

[Zap Rowsdower]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

I'm sensing a common theme here...

 

[cypocraphy]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Well, let's see how his "sit and wait for a woman to talk to him" method continues to work out for him.

 

[He Sets Me On Fire]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

From: Women
To: Christian Weston Chandler

In regard to your request posted on 14 July 2013:

Very Depressed.
Need In-Person,
Real Compassion
From Women.
Hugs and Love.
Please Help.


After some careful deliberation, we (the party hereafter known as "women") have decided to respond with the following:

No. Stop asking.

Sincerely,

Women

 

[BillRiley]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

I'm guessing the price of gift baskets just went up.

 

[DangDirtyTrolls]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Was that a tweet or a telegram?

 

[Male]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

This is just like that story about that dog in japan, who spent his entire life sitting by the train station waiting for his owner to return from his buisness trip, not realising the owner had died on the trip.
Only instead of a dog it's a 31 fat manchild.

 

[champthom]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

I may not be a dating expert, but I think mentioning you're very depressed isn't exactly going to attract women.

 

[milkshark]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Christian Weston Chandler


Very Depressed.
Need In-Person,
Real Compassion
From Women.
Hugs and Love.
Please Help. — feeling sad.

Just call up a hooker like last time, you dumb shit. We're in a shitty economy and ALL of the boyfriend-free girls are hookers now. Paying for a hooker is actually the ONLY way to get a first, second, or THIRD date these days. Thanks Obama.

 

[pickleniggo]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Just call up a hooker like last time, you dumb shit. We're in a shitty economy and ALL of the boyfriend-free girls are hookers now. Paying for a hooker is actually the ONLY way to get a first, second, or THIRD date these days. Thanks Obama.

Well, hookers won't help Chris bandage his mother's holey buttocks.

 

[CatParty]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Chris "Broken Record" Weston Chandler

 

[Meeko]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

If Chris bothered to lower his standards further and bathe, he could probably hook up with one of the multitudes of desperate women on Craigslist. They aren't too picky when you get down to it. He'd still probably strike out more than he'd win, but eventually he'd find someone if he looked in the 30-45 age range.

 

[CatParty]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

The worst part is that he more than likely believes he is pouring his heart out in these messages and hoping that it will garner sympathy. What he doesn't realize is that since he is crowing about this constantly just makes people numb and ignore his pleas for help.

 

[QI 541]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Chris's entire life has been him relying on others to pity him. Works better when you're a child. Or at least, not a creepy asshole.

 

[JULAY]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Christian Weston Chandler


Very Depressed.
Need In-Person,
Real Compassion
From Women.
Hugs and Love.
Please Help. — feeling sad.

Wahh! I'm sad because my life sucks because I have no friends, no purpose in life and I live with a crazy Snorlax hoarder whose holey buttocks I have to bandage!

Sex will make me less sad! IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT MY LIFE IS MISSING!

Perfect logic right there.

 

[CalmMyTits]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

This is just like that story about that dog in japan, who spent his entire life sitting by the train station waiting for his owner to return from his buisness trip, not realising the owner had died on the trip.
Only instead of a dog it's a 31 fat manchild.

aw, that movie broke my heart. Hachi was such a cute dog.

But yeah Christian, your girlfriend situation has not changed because YOU have not changed.

 

[CatParty]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

This is just like that story about that dog in japan, who spent his entire life sitting by the train station waiting for his owner to return from his buisness trip, not realising the owner had died on the trip.
Only instead of a dog it's a 31 fat manchild.

aw, that movie broke my heart. Hachi was such a cute dog.

But yeah Christian, your girlfriend situation has not changed because YOU have not changed.

I think you mean "changed for the better" because he's obviously gotten worse. And furthered him self away from the goal of his quest.

 

[Varis]

Re: Chris is lonely and needs a woman to make it better FB 7

Christian Weston Chandler


Very Depressed.
Need In-Person,
Real Compassion
From Women.
Hugs and Love.
Please Help. — feeling sad.

No. You have two hands. Learn to help yourself.

 

[Thetan]

Well, let's see how his "sit and wait for a woman to talk to him" method continues to work out for him.

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
~ Albert Einstein

Instead of wasting his breath on Facebook, Chris should be using it to fill up one of his inflatable girlfriends. I'm sure Kimmi or Officer Nasty will welcome him back.