Kiwi Farms

  • We're mostly back to 100%. Expect more disruptions that will cause sister service outages for the forseeable future.
Created in 1999, The CLG Wiki-- excuse me, CLG Wiki, is an online "museum" and repository of television bumpers, logos, and idents curated by a very... specific... type of person. Yes, the logos that suffixed the credits of every television show that have now been cast by the wayside thanks to the likes of squeeze credits has a dedicated following of rabid fans foaming at the mouth to argue with one another over things like "cheesiness" and "scare factor" (more on that in a bit).

The Facts:
  • CLG Wiki was established in either 1999 or 2007 (the site states "8 Years!" but lists both 1999 and 2007 at the bottom of the home page).
  • The design standards of the website are so strict that "CLG" is obsessively decorated with red, green, and blue lettering.
  • The CLG Wiki was created by Silversword55. To the surprise of no one, he is a Wikipedian and has an account with Roblox.
  • Currently, Shadeed329 is the administrator and self-proclaimed "CEO" of the website. Because their grasp on business is tenuous as best, co-admins VofDoom and Newave are not CFO or COO but rather "Co-CEO".
  • If you wish to contribute to The CLG Wiki, there are 32 rules for you to follow. Some highlights:
    ---- You are not allowed to make articles or threads for ANY dream logo (more on this too).
    ---- If at anytime you've been cussing and if we catch you, you WILL be dealt with!
    ---- Absolutely, and we mean ABSOLUTELY, NO RACISM!!!
    ---- If you have a gaming toolbar, remove it immediately.
    ---- While we understand the trials [autistic people] deal with, they will be treated the same as everyone else.
    ---- (If you break any of these rules, expect to be BANNED!.)
  • All logos are assigned a "rarity" based upon availability "in the wild". Rarities range from Ultra Common to Extinct.
  • All logos are also arbitrarily assigned a "scare factor" rating that is completely subjective to the editor who added it (just hang on and we'll get to scare factor in a second).


Cheesiness / Scariness:
Before we get into what's cheesy and what's scary, let's take a look at The CLG Wiki's official definitions of the terms cited from their editing tutorial:

Cheesiness said:
This section is used to describe what kind of outdated effects, what doesn't make sense, and how much effort is put into the ident. Humor is key in this section - sly remarks about what is cheesy in the logo always get a laugh out of the reader. Remember, though, not all logos are cheesy.
Click to expand...
Scariness said:
This determines if the logo frightens you or not. The music, animations, and cheesiness are huge factors playing into the scare factor. If a logo scares you, but no one else, try to average out the factor. Putting "Nightmare" on something that only scares you will get the readers annoyed, but if you put "Low to medium", readers can better relate to you.
Click to expand...

Yes, editors of the CLG Wiki assign seemingly random ratings to logos for silly topics, however perhaps the most amusing one is "scariness".

"Surely, Super Collie," you may say, "can someone really be afraid of a television logo?"

Well, let's take a look at two oft-cited examples of the scariest logos ever: Viacom's "V of Doom" and Screen Gems' "S from Hell". [TRIGGER WARNING: Television logos.]

"Super Collie," you finally reply, "you're fucking with me."

Nope. Here's a documentary about people whose lives have been ruined by scary letters.



Dream Logos:
I hope you didn't forget about dream logos in that mess of spooky scary Viacom, because this is its own mess, too. A "dream logo", as depressing as it sounds, is defined by the CLG Dream Logo Wiki as: "a real or fake company's logo that didn't exist".

The Dream Logos wiki also has its own set of inflated rules. Most of them are copied straight from the main wiki, but here's the sole highlight:
  • No attacking/insulting users. Also includes the creation of bullying pages against any user like "(Name of person or user) SUCKS Productions (Entertainment, Studios, Communications)" or whatever.
Dream Logos are their own can of worms and the community around them borrows heavily from the "Pooh's Adventures" school of thought. With that in mind, here's a page full of people reminiscing about logos they've seen in their dreams.


That's Great Collie, But What's the Point?:
The idea behind this thread is similar in vein to the Pooh's Adventures thread, a little nook where you can do some digging if this piques your interest and share some links to spergy/weird/quirky things.

Bonus Feature: Logophile Spotlights
Click any of the following names below to be taken to another megapost in this thread about them!
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