Come up with the worst fanfiction ideas that you can think of. - And it would still probably be better than The Last of Us: Part II. Maybe.

[Thiletonomics]

Has anyone thought about writing a fanfic that is absolutely awful, whether it'd be intentional or not, that it would make people question their sanity if you were to have actually wrote it and they read it?

GIven all of the talk about TLOU2, I was thinking about a fanfic where after Abby score's the Joel-In-One, she disregards Owen's objection to leave Tommy and Ellie (I don't remember if Dina witnessed Joel's death or not) alive, and Abby kills off Ellie, Tommy, and Dina, to tie the loose-ends, and to leave no witnesses. Then somehow, Abby and her friends run into "God", aka Dr. Uckmann, and he wants to prove to the world that Abby is peak character design, and TLOU2 is peak storytelling. The rest of the fic would be a massive crossover fic where Abby and her friends end up golng to other franchises, namely anime and other video games (basically, it would be the things that r/mendrawingwomen, Bikini Armor Battle Damage, Anita, Zoe, and the like would hate), and they go full on Mary Sue and Gary Stu mode and brutally torture and kill those other characters. Some examples of those scenes would include:

-A recreation of a Twitter drawing where Abby punches Uzaki-chan's head off.

-Abby biting off the guy from Boku No Pico's dick and balls off (which people would probably cheer for).

-Abby impaling Jaina Proudmoore (which is ironic since she is also voiced by Laura Bailey) with her own staff, as Abby shoves it up her anus, and comes out through her mouth.

-Abby giving Chihiro Fujisaki a wedgie, and then slams his dick and balls to a pulp with a weight lift bar with all of the weights on and, and does the same to his head.

-Abby orders Mel and Nora (was Nora working in the medical field in TLOU2?) to find a way to attach the Sailor Moon senshi together in a human centipede. Then Tom Six is shown the finished product, and his groin area explodes in reaction to the sight, showering blood and guts everywhere.

-The obligatory TDS scene where Abby rips Donald Trump, and his family members, in half vertically with her bare hands, in front of a live audience and on live TV, with Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, and Dr. Uckmann. After the Trumps are finally conquered for good, Biden says a dementia-filled speech, saying that the Worlds needs more Abbys, and No More Trumps, and also proceeds to shill the shit out of The Last of Us: Part II, and suddenly, all of the TLOU2 copies that were left untouched in stores everywhere suddenly empty out as people go full on consoome mode and buy those games out, and the total sales count gets two 0s added (from ~4 million to 400 million) because of how fast they're selling.

And the fanfic would grow so long, and the sheer methods of torture and murder would be so numerous, that the tags on say, AO3, would easily fill an entire 2560 x 1440 resolution screen.

Also, how you would react, if it turned out that someone else actually wrote a fanfic of the same demented idea(s) that you were thinking about?

 

[Fromtheblackdepths]

Begin with Lily Orchid mixed with Zoe Quinn, for what genre or subject, do you really care to know?

 

[FatFuckingClown]

The Beatles go into the future and none of them are dead and they team up (and have wild, unsanitary, and questionably consensual sexual relations) with Putin in order to stop Hilary from winning the 2016 election. There are many references to JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure and lots of cameos from characters in Steven Universe.

 

[axfaxf]

Current Year Star Wars

 

[PissPotPatty]

Sans x Isabelle but all their dialogue is written in their in-game gibberish.

It would be fun to write or read for that matter, but it'd still be awful.

 

[FatFuckingClown]

The Phantom of the Opera, and everything is exactly the same except that everyone is Korean.

 

[purplemacar0n]

Jesse Pinkman x Walter White...


I know this because I wrote this shit on AO3

 

[FatFuckingClown]

Flowers in the Attic but it’s Ben Shapiro and his big tiddy sister

 

[The Shadow]

A Heroes in Crisis fanfic but I make it worse by having Wally West murdering people be the result of a race with Sonic the Hedgehog gone wrong

Wait, that's not worse than the actual comic.

 

[JuanButNotForgotten]

Fanfiction in the Universe of Avatar: the Last Airbender. Many years later new Avatar is born, who is original OC, female and she is just great, she can bend all the elements from the start and she never listens to anyone, because she is cool and she can do anything, because she is great and a female. And then, and then DARK AVATAR appears, and it's evil and not like this female good avatar, but she beats him, yes, he is a male, and then becomes greater than any avatar, because she is a female and cool. And then she even has romance with her female friend and they go into spirit realm.

Fuck, this sounds awful. I am really glad, that this shit isn't real.

 

[Murmur]

Combining Sonic the Hedgehog with a pokemon, maybe a Pikachu, making a brand new completely original pokemon and then proceeding to chronicle the adventures of this perfectly legit non-copyright infringing abomination and my own wildly idealized self insert character.

 

[Boris Blank's glass eye]

Rogue NYPD cop Max Payne descends into alcoholism, eventually ends up in Brazil as glorified cannon fodder for one of the crime families, fails spectacularly, gets his shit together, then kills everyone and blows up a plane at the end.

The Crying Game adapted into the USA, starring Frank Wu and John Walker Flynt.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

So Naive, Shame On Me
Elder Scrolls modern au. Hurt/comfort, Drama. Dagoth Ur/M'aiq the Liar
Dagoth Ur catches his boyfriend M'aiq sexting the Adoring Fan as a joke. For once, M'aiq will have to tell the truth. How, though? He hasn't told the truth since he was a kitten. Self help books to the rescue.

 

[muh_moobs]

Here it is, folks. The worst fanfic I could possibly imagine. This is original content, donut steele. Pls no bully!


It is spring 2021. The place; Portand, Oregon, USA. Picture if you will a portly, developmentally delayed trans-femme. We find our heroine alone in a one-room apartment, the walls of which are covered in hand-drawn road-maps and drawings of street-signs that look as though they were authored by a young child. Above the door hangs a black sign with white text reading “Portlantifa Barracks, ACAB”, and the warm smell of body odor and fecal material hangs heavy in the area. Pile to the roof in the corner of the room are the empty boxes from several local high-end pizzerias.

Dressed from head-to-toe in black clothing, including a ski-mask, and leather boots, our heroine types frantically into the cracked screen of an older model of iPhone while cradling a three-foot long wooden club in the crook of her left arm. With GREAT anger and FURIOUS vengeance, she types the final posts of her manifesto into her twitter interface.

“For too long has the capitalist swine you call CWC stolen the money from our cause and our government. In the name of Comrade Biden I swear I shall avenge this. We’ll see how weak you think antifa is when you’ve lost your preshious CWC. Consider this a warning, you’re all next!” reads the text written on the screen. With a furtive motion and an audible grunt, Isabel Rosa Aurajo presses her greasy finger down on the “Post” button, leaving an oily splotch on the screen of her phone.

Suddenly, an alert displays over the browser, reading “Your Uber has arrived”. Rising to her feet, Isabel puts a black backpack over her shoulders and dons a pair of sunglasses. “This is it, Phillip, time to face your fate!” she assures herself as she steps out of her apartment door into the hallway of her Section 8 housing block. Departing with great swift, she forgets to lock the door behind her before arduously climbing down the three steps to the ground floor to her waiting ride.

After a short trip in the rain-soaked streets, Isabel arrives at the Greyhound station and presents her boarding pass. With this, she is granted access to the greatest transportation her means can afford. After a brief wait for the other passengers to finish boarding, the bus departs, and our heroine is off on the greatest adventure of a life-time. "Finally, those mocking bastards at K*w*f*r*s will fear her as they always should have."

A week goes by, and Isabel enjoys the sights riding the highways of the so-called United States of America, gradually but inching her way closer to the State of Virginia and her ultimate destination, the small, cluttered, and neglected house at 14 Branchland Court, Ruckersville. On the final day, she disembarks and exits the Greyhound terminal closest to her destination. It is night-time and raining. The downpour is as heavy as it was when she left Portland. “Fitting”, she thinks to herself, “this storm shall be the perfect backdrop for my revenge. I’ll finally show those fascist, transphobic, nazi, TERF, cis-scum bigots my superiority!”

Withdrawing the damaged iPhone from one of her chest pockets, Isabel orders a Lyft to transport her over the final leg of her trip. After a short, five-minute wait in the rain, her ride arrives. Instantly upon entering the back seat, the driver opens the driver’s window as wide as possible, preferring the wetness of the rain to the smell of his fair. With one hand pinching the bridge of his nose, he turns and asks “Where ya headed?” Upon hearing the address, the driver’s eyes open wide as he thinks to himself “This must be that Jacob fellow!” He turns back to face forward and a smile quickly crosses his face before being washed away by the rain.

Three hours pass, and Isabel has finally arrived at her destination in Ruckersville. “Drop me off across the street” come the instructions from the backseat. Isabel slowly climbs out of the backseat, and her ride departs. Suddenly, a flash of red lights can be seen reflecting off of her face and the wet concrete. The Lyft driver has stopped and is profusely hosing down the backseat of his vehicle with a can of scented Febreeze branded aerosol. Not understanding why he is doing this, Isabel shouts at him about it being transphobic to disinfect his vehicle after transporting a member of the LGBT. Fearing for his safety, the Lyft driver abruptly drops his spray-can with a loud clank, enters his vehicle, and quickly drives away.

Turning back, Isabel now faces the home of her arch-nemesis, the oft-celebrated Christine Weston Chandler Sonichu. She slides a collapsible baton out of a pouch on her belt and extends it. Speaking aloud, she comforts herself “Keep it together, Phillip” before marching out into the street without checking for traffic.

Suddenly, a loud tire screech can be heard seconds before a loud thump. Isabel has been struck by a Blue Dodge Grand Caravan. Isabel falls to the ground temporarily before rising to her feet and turning to confront her aggressor as an obese man dressed like a 12 year-old girl exits the vehicle. Adjusting the white skirt he is wearing over some purple leggings, he quickly stammers “Oh, suh-sorry, I didn ev-evun see you dere. I-I-I was just weturn-weturnin’ home wit some, wit some bananananas for my mudd-for momma’s mudder. We can, we can make dis go away if you come in”.

The man adjusts his fecal-green hair and adjusts his bra while looking at Isabel. It is at this moment that she notices a yellow-and-black piece of jewelry being worn around the man’s neck. “This is it, this is him!” thinks Isabel upon recognizing the ornament to be the world-famous, original and copy write-protected character “Sonichu, the Electric-Hedgehog Pokemon”.

Suddenly, upon making eye-contact with her would-be target, Isabel feels an unfamiliar stirring in her groin as her girl-cock musters with all it’s might the most pathetic erection the world has ever witnesses. With a sudden shortness of breath and an increase in her heart-beat, Isabel stammers “Why yes, I’d love to!” before dropping her baton to the ground.

As Isabel makes her way to the front door, the obese man parks his van on the unpaved driveway before joining her. “Please watch out for da puppies” he says as he opens the door into the house. A wall of hot air wafts outward, washing both in an aura of ammonia-smelling vapors. “Juss head down-downstairs and make yerself comfabow” the man remarks before walking upstairs.

Isabel decends into the basement, experiencing difficulty walking as her rectum puckers and quakes. She passes what appears to be an elementary-school student’s desk covered in much detritus, but continues on her way further inward, locating the obese man’s bedroom. Our heroine takes a seat on the edge of the bed facing the door, reaching out and gently stroking the “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic” bedspread with her left hand. Looking around, she sees all the children’s toys and thinks to herself “I could get used to this!” just as the man enters the room while tying a towel around his head to dry his hair.

Our heroine one more rises to her feet and, crossing the room, gives the obese man the most passionate kiss she can muster before falling back on the bed and removing her pants. She lifts her bent legs in the air and holds them aloft with her hands on her knees and begins to explain “Chris, I came here for something else, but I’ve realized I can’t live without you. Take me now and I’ll be yours forever.”

The obese man begins to respond, stuttering slowly “B-but I’m Sonichu inhabiting dis body and mind while momma” when he is suddenly interrupted.

Assuming this to simply be a role-play, Isabel cuts the man off and exclaims “Alright then, Sonichu. Enter my body and Zap to the extreme!” The man suddenly and with great haste lifts his skirt, revealing his semi-erect four-inch member that curves to the side and reaches over to the stereo on the night-stand to the side of the bed. Pushing a series of buttons, “All Star” by the band “Smash Mouth” suddenly begins to play at a loud volume. The man strips his shirt off but leaves his necklace around his neck.

Five minutes later and after much effort on both of their parts, Christine has successfully penetrated Isabel. As the smell of blood and defecation and rotten watermelons fills the air, Christine sings aloud “ONLY SHOOTING STARS BREAK DA MOWOWED!”

Isabel, looking up into the eyes of her new lover, gently caresses the side of Christine’s face. Suddenly, Isabel lets out a loud cat-like noise and arcs her neck backwards.

With a sudden jolt of energy and a loud thudding noise, Isabel attempts to sit upright before falling back down with another, subtler thud. It is a hot, humid August morning, and the birds are singing. Quickly examining her surroundings, Isabel once again finds herself sleeping beneath a bridge in Portland, Oregon. She pulls the newspaper she had used as a blanket away from herself and checks the headline; “Stockmarket reaches second all-time high of Trump’s second term” it reads.

Without removing her bicycle helmet, Isable quickly scampers down the embankment while shouting to herself “Forget the Orange Tyrant! I’ve got to get back!” Having arrived on the level-ground of a bike path, Isabel rushes around the corner of the bridge and retrieves a jar containing a dark viscous substance and sealed with a balloon. Pinching the balloon closed, she hastily removes it and lifts it to her nose before letting it open and breathing in deeply. Another loud thud can be heard as Isabel falls to the ground unconscious due to sudden anoxia.

What her dreams hold in store for her next is anyone’s guess.

 

[Syaoran Li]

Adora, She-Ra of the SS

Imagine one of the most woke cartoon characters this side of Steven Universe and reimagining her into a cis het Nazi domme and then take the immense level of cringe inherent to that concept and multiply by fifteen million times.

Also starring Amy Lee as Ebony Darkness Dementia Raven Way and Nicolas Cage as Fu Manchu!

 

[Overcast]

Jesse Pinkman x Walter White...


I know this because I wrote this shit on AO3

JESSE!

Y-yeah Mr. White?

We have to COOK!

M-Mr. White...

Say my name Jesse. SAY MY NAME!!!

H-HEISENBERG!!

You're goddamn right.....

 

[Fromtheblackdepths]

Combining Sonic the Hedgehog with a pokemon, maybe a Pikachu, making a brand new completely original pokemon and then proceeding to chronicle the adventures of this perfectly legit non-copywrite infringing abomination and my own wildly idealized self insert character.

That would never come to pass...right?

 

[Turkey Twister]

Naruto wakes up in Hogwarts and gets a harem. Learns magic and fights Voldemort.
Or the inverse. Harry Potter wakes up in the whatever ninja village and gets a harem and fights Madara.

 

[Mr. Bones]

Sonichu and Kevin Gibes crossover. Buts it's mediocre and not as autistic as you expect it to be

 

[Cyclonus]

The death of Elvis Presley from the point of view of the toilet.