Contain your orgasms, ladies: CWC at his least appealing -

[Globe]

I guess this just amounts to another favorite/worst moment of Christory, but I couldn't find anything like it digging back a few pages, and I'd like to hear other people's two cents. Part of what draws me, and I imagine others, into the horrors of CWC is how utterly revolting he is, in terms of appearance, attitude, general ass-backwards beliefs...I could go on, but I'm sure you've got the idea. I think I've said it before, but it's worth repeating; even though I've got a somewhat decent grip of Chris' understanding of reality (thanks to a lot of the armchair pyscho-analysis that goes on around here), I look at some of his videos and still find myself pretty flabbergasted that he thinks anybody would ever have any interest in him at all, let alone chase after him.

What videos am I talking about? There's a grand number, but this is a good place to start;

[youtube]U-ddcMAc0gc[/youtube]

Bullet-list, because I'm lazy...

[*]His hair is grown out slightly longer in this video than others from pre-Tomgirl days. It doesn't look greasy, but it still seems to be matted to his head, and it's just...goofy looking.
[*]Giant coke-bottle sized pedo-glasses
[*]Fucking hunk of children's modeling clay keeping said giant coke-bottle sized pedo-glasses in-tact
[*]The entire video is detailing how he shits himself in public. And cleans it with his underwear.

Like I said, even though I know what's preventing him from realizing how horribly unappealing this is, I still can't watch this video (and many others from the beginning of the Tomgirl phase) without saying "fucking why?" to myself several times, and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. SO, that's where this thread comes in. For you, dear reader, what's that one picture/video/correspondence involving Christian that was so weird, unappealing, and just plain unattractive that it transiently broke your brain?

 

[random_pickle]

[youtube]wEKLxgRJnAc[/youtube]

- Those eyes, I don't know why though
-The greasy, receeding hairline
-Chris, did you know that outright lying is a huge turn off?
-The wall of originals in the background destroys the mood Chris is trying to make
-His "oral play", I think my vagina just sewed itself shut
-Calling Jackie "Ivy", just.........god damnit Chris
-The sports bra at the end, yeah

 

[NobleGreyHorse]

Also, dat coated tongue. Either he hasn't brushed his teeth in a million years, or it's some obscure health thing, but goddamn.

 

[HealthyMcWrap]

As a male, I'm not qualified to answer this question.

 

[Da Pickle Monsta]

I'd have to say it was when Chris made the "Chris Sings a Fart Song for Flora" video.

It's basically Chris talking at length about farting.

 

[tehpope]

Yeah, and I'm just gonna keep bangin' your BREASTS OVER AND OVER AGAIN until you get the first DOSAGE of my comeuppance!... And then you know what, I'm going to lick it, I'm gonna lick it off your face, and then we're gonna share it in our tongue like tongue sharing MOMENT!

 

[Some JERK]

this video triggers my fight or flight response.

[youtube]Ya6IvA7WUmg[/youtube]

 

[Judge Holden]

Two Words.

Hi Iveeeeeeeeeee

[youtube]0zWvJ6xOcio[/youtube]

 

[CatParty]

the entirety of his most recent okcupid profile. just about all of it is cringe inducingly unattractive.
from the top picture:

Spoiler

to the contents of the profile itself:

Spoiler

My self-summary

I am an all-around, emotionally mature, good natured, high-functioning autistic, heterosexual tomgirl artist. I feel better being treated as a person than some sort of freak or something. I am a good listener, and sometimes I have to take my time thinking about a topic or issue. I am the Original Creator of Sonichu, Rosechu, and the city of Cwcville, VA. (IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS)

I like making those close to me emotionally happy. Even though, I have been feeling seriously depressed, lonely and having constant heartaches.

I am looking for a woman to be my friend/Sweetheart/Future Wife from the ground up. She should be true and honest in personality, all-around, compassionate, understanding and patient.

ALL Women interested in me MUST be willing to meet in person/in real life IMMEDIATELY; I have had bad online experiences numerously from a lot of fake people. Finding me in Person at my hangout is the best bet; I usually am Very cautious about any and all messages I receive online and I screen my phone calls. AND getting my attention must be direct with a pleasant greeting and introduction.

Please forgive me if I respond coldly or timidly at first, I am very shy, and I am paranoid of most people and the kind of bad person they may be.
What I’m doing with my life

I'm keeping it real; taking it one day at a time working on my projects and helping my family. I also work on my art projects, get some exercise in; all that good stuff.
I’m really good at

Drawing, writing, crafting, making well-thought decisions, heavy lifting, holding a conversation, showing a woman a good time (on a date with taking her to a restaurant and/or finding a fun event to check out and share).
The first things people usually notice about me

I would have to give it to my face, especially in in-person times. When I look at other people, I notice their faces first most often. Aside from that, they notice my being friendly, kind and easy to converse with.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Goosebumps or Fear Street Novels from R.L. Stein; "Mary Poppins" is my favorite movie of all time; I like most kinds of music (but my favorite singer is Britney Spears); Mac & Cheese, Grilled Chicken.
The six things I could never do without

(After I've found the one) My Girlfriend/Sweetheart.
My iPhone.
My creative genius.
My good health.
My glasses.
Food/Water.

I spend a lot of time thinking about

How and where to socialize better.
On a typical Friday night I am

I am Very Interested in pleasantly livening up my Friday and Saturday Nights.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit

I am very interested in sex as well as ALL of the True Love emotions, loyalty and honesty that go along with it. I am Compassionate And Passionate.
I’m looking for

Straight girls only
Ages 25–30
Near me
Who are single
For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, activity partners, casual sex

You should message me if

You can MEET ME IN PERSON Right Now; Online Communications are OUT. As Well As If You are A) 25-30 years old, B) not black (no personal offense), C) NOT a Smoker, D) Honest, Compassionate and Pretty, E) no taller than 5'10" F) Single, G) Reside in or around Charlottesville or Ruckersville, VA, H) financially stable (I get along fair and surviving), and You'd Like to Get To Know Me Better In Person, share a pleasant conversation, etc.

 

[DykesDykesChina]

 

[drmccoy]

You know, I've seen some hilarious Pick-Up artist, MRA profiles. The "nice-guy, but girls pick the asshole" profiles as well. They're pretty pathetic. Chris's though is worse than all of those. Every lie he has is easily found out by Google and the Cwciki. And you know a potential "Sweetheart from the ground-up" will Google him.

That picture doesn't say "Attractive male". It screams "potential applicant for "most likely to appear on To Catch a Predator.

 

[Alec Benson Leary]

And you know a potential "Sweetheart from the ground-up" will Google him.

Well, no. See, he specifically instructed all future gal-pals to IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS. That way the cwcki will not factor into their decision-making, as such.

 

[Stratochu]

The sex tape, shitting his briefs and hiding under a pile of plushies (likely containing his first Sonic, his newer one, Super Sonic, Amy Rose, Amanita, Pikachu, the clown doll and Li'l Chris, all seen in videos and pics of his room) after getting a call from an EPIC WEEN "troll" pretending to be Clyde Cash, his behavior in jail, the "first date" audio, CWCFlyingElephants, Cakefarts and For J-R's Eyes Only. Honestly nothing Chris-chan does is appealing, but these are his worst.

Also, anything he did inside the Chandler cars has to be nasty. A member specifically mentioned a Ford Aerostar in the backyard of 14BC after going past it when in Ruckersville, meaning that our favorite Chandler Car still exists but most likely doesn't run anymore, I can imagine Chris using the Aerostar as a place to hide from , play his DS, Game Boy or Vita, drink soda or sweet tea, eat shit from Sheetz, El Agave ala carte burritos or q-sands, listen to music on his iPod Touch, mass debate and shit himself. Not to mention DIRTY CRAPPED CONNOLLY LEATHER in the BMW and Cadillac, and presumably in the Jaguar Bob used to own too.

If I was Chris, I would spend as much time in the third-row seat of the Aerostar as possible to get away from and the filth and stench of 14BC.

 

[butt in trouble]

I think the video showing just how insane and delusional Chris is are actually more off putting.
[youtube]nR_udefSZt4[/youtube]
-As quoted from the cwcki he doesn't say I would have sex with three women or I drew myself having sex with three women. He say I AM having sex with three women.
-"da won in da middo is haff n haff"-Chris letting people know he's not racist because he'd fuck a black or half black chick.
-He proceeds to call the trolls immature and it completely oblivious to the irony.

 

[BigAltheGreat921]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=FomKwM7rQw8

This absolutely reeks of TMI and sexual deviance.

 

[soIregistered]

I love how he says "IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS!" in his sweetheart quest. Is that all it takes? Could a guy be like "I'm a registered sex offender. IGNORE ALL GOOGLE RESULTS!" and that makes it okay?

Google doesn't erase jizz drinking and doll humping. It's FOREVERZ

 

[cypocraphy]

With what happened today, I'll say his 2013 pictures.

 

[Picklepower]

When he's in that butt garment, licking the medallion.

 

[RagtimeRoastBeefy]

[youtube]8axUqa5XUFA[/youtube]

this one, practically stating he only wants to be friends with this woman to fuck her, and that he only wants to go through that trouble because he can't afford hookers, which he is totally willing to pay for but unable to do so lol

 

[Male]

.Pull up any video from the jackie saga
The video where licks the air for 30 seconds, his cakefarts, his fat ass jiggling, him taking his blowup doll out in PUBLIC, the stripping, that...story where he has sex with a deer. All while looks like a crack addict tranny.
You can thank Jackie for all of that