Cook with me - 5/2/19

RemoveKebab

SERBIA STRONG
kiwifarms.net

00:00 Our gorl is looking extra rough today. I am going to wager that this will be a bad update video and that she is back on the cycle. Hopefully I'm wrong. :optimistic:

00:05 It only took 5 seconds to get my answer. She is not doing well mentally Booboo.
:story:

00:10 Anxiety and Depression are back to visit our gorl.

00:15 Holy shit her stage right bra strap is so fucking gross. It has mold on it. :cryblood:

00:20 She says she has an appointment with someone who truly specializes in mental health disorders.
  • No chance she actually goes to the appointment
00:40 Our gorl may have to go back on medication for her mental health.
  • This will end poorly because she will binge and say the weight gain is from the medication ya'll. I haven't binged in 27 days.
00:45 big ups Liqiud Twinkie for holding it down.

01:00 Here come the violins. It is hard to be a big person and even harder with these mental issues.
  • Cry me a river. You are 560+ pounds by your own choice. Lose weight and maybe life wouldn't be so hard.
01:10 Holy shit she called her job hard. My mind is fucking blown. She talks about the struggle of uploading multiple videos a week. That's it I'm out.















01:35 Our gorl isnt looking too motivated. I wonder what happened to her daily exercises?

02:05 Gorl slept in her makeup again and didn't even bother to wash it off in the morning. Bitch is nasty. :cryblood:

02:27 Our gorl starts walking towards the counter to show the brand of sausage and the waddle was real. I felt like I was in a Battlefield game crawling towards the objective. PTFO.

02:27 Also the chicken sausage is precooked and she put it in the pan with raw onions and peppers. That sausage will be as dry as a bone. I know Amber likes her meat well done but damn.

02:45 Big ups Wommart for holding it down.

03:02 Oh shit a mini-Wommart haul:
  • Yasso Greek yogurt bars. We know she eats those by the box.
  • 03:20 One of these is totally fine - The Hamburger Lynn Diet 2019
  • 03:25 We see Necky waddle in from the side and walk behind Hamber. Her face looks like a Halloween mask.
  • 03:31 Two Bell Peppers
  • 03:35 ThREEEE bags of frozen veggies
  • 04:02 More chicken sausages
  • End Wommart transmission
04:10 RIP chicken sausage. See you at the crossroads nigga.

04:25 Necky on camera and talking about how picky she is.

04:45 Hamber puts the camera down in front of the plate for all of her feeders out there.

04:56 Random Necky Tidbit - She likes to steal bites of food while Eric and Ricky cook.

05:10 Random fact: Ricky can cook.

05:27 This meal reminds Hamber of the sausage mook-bong.

05:44 Apparently this meal is only 480 calories.

06:23 Amber said that chicken sausage is lower carb that kielbasa. Holy Shit she is dumb.

06:27 Doubling down on stupidity Amber says that chicken sausage has "more of a natural ingredient "
  • Care to unpack that one for me Amber?
06:58 Our gorl tells us she doesn't like to cook. No shit sherlock. Why cook when McDonald's can do it for ya gorl!

07:18 Our gorl hits her chest with her finger and the fat starts jiggling :story:

07:19 Our gorl hates, hates, hates following a recipe.

07:35 Hamber's new plan is to get subscribers to send her recipes for her to try.
  • You should know that you are going to get people trolling you with bad for you recipes Sis.
07:52 what is up with Eric's laugh? It sounds like a Turkey being molested by SonicFox.

07:57 Eric starts dancing behind Hamber's shoulder.

08:15 Eric and his cat turd hair fully appear before the camera. Behold that stunning masterpiece of spergery.

08:22 Eric fulfills every feeders dream (including Joshua Connor Moon) and feeds Amber some chicken with smoked paprika. After he puts the bite of food in her mouth, he makes the worst orgasm face in the world.

The rest of the video is drivel. I'M DONE.

I need MMMOOOOOOOORRRRRRREEEEEEE BEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRR :cans:👻:cans:👻:cans:
 
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dookerbewitt

In at least one of countless realities we fucked
kiwifarms.net
Hey neat more medication she will refuse to listen to directions for.

Apparently it's her depression and her brain that's keeping her from uploading 'several several times a week' not her fault at all guys (:_(

Jesus christ I could have done without seeing the moppey gay feed her. We're one step closer to Amber's succulent feeder career.
 
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ADHD

kiwifarms.net
Only 9 minutes and 1 second? Will she be able to cram the max amount of ads into a video that short?

Oh boo hoo, whining about her anxiety and depression (again).

She's going back on medication (again). How long before she gains weight (again) and blames it on her medication (again) and makes the choice to stop taking her medication (again)?

This is a sequel no one asked for.
 

Whatthefuck

kiwifarms.net
Only 9 minutes and 1 second? Will she be able to cram the max amount of ads into a video that short?

Oh boo hoo, whining about her anxiety and depression (again).

She's going back on medication (again). How long before she gains weight (again) and blames it on her medication (again) and makes the choice to stop taking her medication (again)?

This is a sequel no one asked for.
Yep, this sequel is more disappointing than The Last Jedi.
 

hamburgerlardraid

kiwifarms.net
I understand that the topic of terminal uniqueness has been discussed before, namely in Ambercon 2.0 when Eve and MBP brought it up but I want to discuss it more after watching today's "video". Amberlynn is so deep in her head and in delusion's asshole that she thinks that all of her struggles and illnesses are specific to only her and no one else has ever comparably suffered. This is incredibly obvious when she talked about seeing a psychiatrist. She wanted to see someone that "specializes in anxiety and depression" (don't you mean most mental health professionals??). She is so delusional that she puts off seeking help because she thinks no one will help her because she thinks she is so special and unique that no one can understand the complexities of her tiny mind. Sorry for the ranty cuntiness, this is just my two cents.
 

Whatthefuck

kiwifarms.net
It astounds me that she knows so little about cooking. You usually don't cook your fully cooked meat and raw vegetables together. God the texture of that shit must suck.
She's never grasped the basics of texture or flavor pallets. She swims like a manatee in a sea of whatever she can get down her gullet as fast as she can. She never truly savors or enjoys what she's eating. That was made abundantly clear in the Taco Bell mukbang with Becks. Not that Taco Bell is something to be savored, but if you'll remember she got sassy with Becks for eating so slowly and Becks said she likes to savor. Then Hamber says that if you eat faster you get more food. That's how her little gerbil wheel of a mind works.

I've said repeatedly that it escapes me why an unemployed food addict who watches YouTube constantly doesn't look up a tutorial once in a while. Look up a cooking channel and try one of the recipes that looks good to you. There are so many YouTube "chefs" who specialize in different diets and lifestyles. It's truly baffling that she never bothers to do that. I watch this nice Cambodian lady who does all kinds of shit and I watch it because it's interesting from a cultural perspective, but it also gives me ideas to incorporate into my own meals. This is a concept that is apparently beyond her capacity. She'd rather eat absolute shit slop soup than follow a recipe.
 

Sextina Aquafina

kiwifarms.net
Wakes up in all her makeup. Doesn't wash her face (or anything else) and sits down to cook herself a huge plate of food. She is so disgusting. Leaves a mess on the counter that I'm sure Becky has to clean up.
The minimal amount of effort she puts in everything is crazy. She literally had a plastic wrapped (microwaved) baked potato and she couldn’t be bothered to use a fork and knife, or even two hands to cut it like a normal human being.
 

DontTellMeHowToPlay

If you listen to fools, the mob rules!
kiwifarms.net
Did something happen to her left cheek? It looks pink and swollen and different from her other cheek. Could just be left-over makeup.

Also, LOL at her saying "Are you a Feeder?" We all knew there was a reason she likes to film her cleavage. Wonder how Becky feels about that...
 
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Long time lurker

kiwifarms.net
Apparently it's her depression and her brain that's keeping her from uploading 'several several times a week' not her fault at all guys
Deja vu.
she thinks that all of her struggles and illnesses are specific to only her and no one else has ever comparably suffered.
she thinks she is so special and unique that no one can understand the complexities of her tiny mind
All narcissists are like that.
sits down to cook herself a huge plate of food
So, what happened to "I only eat 4 hours after I wake up"? Or does it take her 4 hours to get from the mattress to the kitchen?
I watch this nice Cambodian lady who does all kinds of shit and I watch it because it's interesting from a cultural perspective, but it also gives me ideas to incorporate into my own meals.
I bet that you've been cooking regularly for a few years now. At least for me, it took years to go from following a recipe closely to getting to a point where I know I can substitute ingredients and/or add techniques/ingredients to what I cook.

Amber, according to what @ADHD posted, doesn't follow recipes on principle so she never really learned how to cook. There is no way she can make do with what she has in the house.

Edited:

Did something happen to her left cheek? It looks pink and swollen and different from her other cheek.
That is probably the side of her face touching the pillow(s) when she was asleep.
 

497

kiwifarms.net
She's never grasped the basics of texture or flavor pallets. She swims like a manatee in a sea of whatever she can get down her gullet as fast as she can. She never truly savors or enjoys what she's eating. That was made abundantly clear in the Taco Bell mukbang with Becks. Not that Taco Bell is something to be savored, but if you'll remember she got sassy with Becks for eating so slowly and Becks said she likes to savor. Then Hamber says that if you eat faster you get more food. That's how her little gerbil wheel of a mind works.

I've said repeatedly that it escapes me why an unemployed food addict who watches YouTube constantly doesn't look up a tutorial once in a while. Look up a cooking channel and try one of the recipes that looks good to you. There are so many YouTube "chefs" who specialize in different diets and lifestyles. It's truly baffling that she never bothers to do that. I watch this nice Cambodian lady who does all kinds of shit and I watch it because it's interesting from a cultural perspective, but it also gives me ideas to incorporate into my own meals. This is a concept that is apparently beyond her capacity. She'd rather eat absolute shit slop soup than follow a recipe.
she did make that chicken slop in the grockbot. she said she got the idea from another youtuber. Maybe that's a problem...most of the youtubers she watches don't cook or do mukbangs and you know how she's "other youtubers do it so can I..."
 

Whatthefuck

kiwifarms.net
she did make that chicken slop in the grockbot. she said she got the idea from another youtuber. Maybe that's a problem...most of the youtubers she watches don't cook or do mukbangs and you know how she's "other youtubers do it so can I..."
She did, but from what I can remember she didn't even follow that recipe to the letter. I have a general rule that if I'm making something for the first time I'll follow it to the letter (except for garlic, I want all the garlic) then once it comes out I'll play around with it next time. She couldn't get a grockbot dump recipe right. It's actually quite stunning how inept she is in the kitchen given her size and history.
 
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