Craigslist Cringe Thread -

[DatBepisTho]

Checked the ones for my favorite shithole state and they did not disappoint. On mobile, so sorry it's just links.

Dude wants to get it on with a lesbian couple and loves bi chicks. Something lesbians are, y'know, not known for being.

Just a man looking for perfect woman who is modest but lewd, jealous but not possessive, kind but cruel, has free will but submits.

 

[Smarmy]

I just checked the Craigslist from my former major city, and apparently there was quite the saga. Someone is uploading a photo of Batman, followed by tons of photos of naked/scantily-clad women. Apparently he had haters, but all of those posts must have gotten flagged, because I couldn't find them. I'm also not posting all of his posts, because there were a LOT.

Spoiler: The Half Batman Guy

These are basically what his posts look like

Here are some of his fans

And a potential cry for help from the caped crusader himself

 

[The Shadow]

Spoiler: spoilered due to words

This handsome pilot wants a young woman to fly with him in his small plane to Florida, buy him lunch and then immediately tell you to fuck off because he's not letting you stay with him. He might ask his host to let you have the couch if you're really nice, but if not have fun being homeless in Miami for a week.

He promises not to rape you, but if he decides he doesn't like you he's just going to ditch you in Florida. He is totally okay with you not having sex with him and there is no hidden agenda. Adventurous types only.

G-8 wouldn't need a Craigslist ad to get laid. What the fuck kind of pilot needs to play these kinds of games? I smell something foul.

 

[RJ MacReady]

G-8 wouldn't need a Craigslist ad to get laid. What the fuck kind of pilot needs to play these kinds of games? I smell something foul.

The good news is that if he murders you the case will quickly be adapted into a CSI: Miami episode.

 

[Angry New Ager]

Las Vegas is a massive, seething vortex of crazy, so Dregslist there is always bound to deliver:

 

[RealtreeByGod]

 

[The Great Citracett]

I posted the first crazy rambling textwall from this tainted weed guy on the last page. Now he's making updates on his condition. Dying of Cannabis Cancer, but just can't put down the weed. Literal reefer madness.

NO LOWBALLS I KNOW WHAT I HAVE!

Just an extremely common base set Charmander. Worth $0.10 if he's lucky.

These are from a current "reboot" of the base set cards. The Charizard looks cool, but is maybe worth $5. Pikachu is common as dirt. Just go grab a $4 booster pack at walmart, chances are you'll get both in it.

This guy on the other hand knows exactly what he has and has been reposting this ad for about a year now.

 

[CIA Nigger]

My personal favorite is the Killer7 advertisement.

 

[DatBepisTho]

As far as Craigslist m4m personals in my shitholes of choice goes, this one is pretty tame and provides a good laugh. Points for the Macho Man pic too.

- I hope they get to eat burgers some day.

 

[Double Dragon]

I have so many questions about this one. Is he a legitimate real estate agent? Are you going to be looking at actual properties? Does this count as rp if you end up buying a condo at the end of it, or...?

Note the age

 

[💗Bitchstopher Columbitch💗]

My personal favorite is the Killer7 advertisement.
View attachment 400626

I love how he says he smokes cock.

This guy on the other hand knows exactly what he has and has been reposting this ad for about a year now.

You should definitely buy that tape. I bet it's haunted.

 

[Gym Leader Elesa]

I posted the first crazy rambling textwall from this tainted weed guy on the last page. Now he's making updates on his condition. Dying of Cannabis Cancer, but just can't put down the weed. Literal reefer madness.
View attachment 400523
View attachment 400524
View attachment 400525
NO LOWBALLS I KNOW WHAT I HAVE!
View attachment 400526
Just an extremely common base set Charmander. Worth $0.10 if he's lucky.
View attachment 400527
These are from a current "reboot" of the base set cards. The Charizard looks cool, but is maybe worth $5. Pikachu is common as dirt. Just go grab a $4 booster pack at walmart, chances are you'll get both in it.

This guy on the other hand knows exactly what he has and has been reposting this ad for about a year now.
View attachment 400528

If I bought that cassette my irony would attain max levels. Decisions, decisions.

 

[The Great Citracett]

If I bought that cassette my irony would attain max levels. Decisions, decisions.

Can't believe I forgot to mention it, but he's selling that tape for a dollar. Been posting that elaborate ad for over a year now for one dollar.

Reefer madness strikes again!

Creepypasta? Or maybe he wrote it himself...

Also he's apparently some sort of prophet.

 

[Cure Milquetoast]

https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/wj75ab/craigslist-personal-ads-sesta-fosta

the end of an era.

 

[RJ MacReady]

https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/wj75ab/craigslist-personal-ads-sesta-fosta

the end of an era.

They're still online in Canada, but sadly American CL weirdos are second to none.

 

[Anime is Blood]

https://motherboard.vice.com/en_us/article/wj75ab/craigslist-personal-ads-sesta-fosta

the end of an era.

Maybe this will give the weird elderly cat lady that spammed my local missed connections section something else to do. She posted hundreds of times about some guy that broke up with her 10+ years ago and it was super depressing.

 

[CIA Nigger]

Personals might be gone but the crazy listings are far from gone.

Also the Rants and Raves section is a comedy goldmine. For example here's some guy ranting about some boomer using the handle "Hyde Park 63".

Salt about Kentucky:

 

[Cure Milquetoast]

Oh my god.....you're right about Rants & Raves

Use................Grindr.

 

[CIA Nigger]

Some flat earth rants:

More random posts:

 

[The Great Citracett]

Seriously?