Creepy children's toys thread - Why did they make this?

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Bassomatic

True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Dear Mom and Dad, you tried and I love you but...

this is why I drink and cry myself to sleep every night.

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Coldgrip

Still not Cody.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
You know why they made toys like these? Because kids weren't pansies back then. Back then having dangerous moving parts was a sign that you could find dozens of awesome unintended uses for the thing and you'd be amused for hours. I wish kids nowadays had toys like these, it'd help the little bastards build their imaginations and weed out the stupid and weak ones.

Goddamn there were some great toys growing up.
 

Bugaboo

I have to kill fast and bullets too slow
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Dear Mom and Dad, you tried and I love you but...

this is why I drink and cry myself to sleep every night.

teddyruxpin-e.gif
I had one of these fuckers and I adored it to pieces as a child. I can't bring myself to find it scary as an adult because of it.
Mine is quite silly because I was a very squeamish child.
They made toys for Jurassic Park 3 and I loved dinosaurs so I had to have some! It really upset me that they had like, massive gashes in their sides with ribs sticking out. When you pushed one of the ribs the dinosaurs would roar or make whatever noise. I enjoyed them other than that one thing
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Also I was legitimately terrified of a Woody the Cowboy doll and I don't remember the reason, I liked the movie a lot but the doll horrified me, I might have been 3 or 4.
 

ToroidalBoat

Token Hispanic Friend
True & Honest Fan
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Dr.Research

Dissertation Topic: Lolcows
True & Honest Fan
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This fucking doll gave me a whole new perspective on "the birds and the bees" before I even knew what that meant:

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I've read that a lot o people were skeezed out by Midge but she was one of my favorites. Maybe because she wasn't blonde like I wasn't. But then again Health class was always one of my favorites as a child.

Apparently there was some controversy because when the doll first was made she didn't have a wedding ring so certain people spazzed because having a child out of wedlock would make Midge a whore and influence their daughters accordingly. The later dolls, like mine, had a little gold band painted on her ring finger.
 

XYZpdq

fbi most wanted sskealeaton
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
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Creepy in the sense that he murdered his girlfriend while high on coke and basically got away with it. I was oblivious to that for years and years.
The way that particular toy hops is goofy as fuck too.
 

Coleman Francis

❤KKK❤
True & Honest Fan
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Creepy in the sense that he murdered his girlfriend while high on coke and basically got away with it. I was oblivious to that for years and years.


That toy is even scarier in context!! Superfly Jimmy Snuka told that story on the Opie and Anthony radio show about how his girlfriend fell over, hit her head and later died from the injuries she sustained back in the early 1980's. Some people accused Jimmy since there were reports of domestic violence in the past regarding those two. It went to court and he was found innocent of the crime. I think he told the story about it on O&A in 2010 IIRC, but last year (maybe this year) a court found sufficient evidence to bring it back to court. This time around he was found guilty and is sitting in jail awaiting sentencing for the murder of his old girlfriend. That is a scary looking Mexican.
 

meatslab

Magical, pansexual, non-threatening spokesthing
True & Honest Fan
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My mom put up a shelf full of clown dolls like this one (and a hobo clown, and a clown with X's for eyes) in my room. Wee Slab liked clowns until the incident at the circus. So from then on out I had a big fear of clowns. :c

I didn't have the heart to ask my mom to take them out of my room because I didn't want to hurt her feelings since she bought them in the first place. I told her about this later and she laughed and said she would of taken them out if she knew they scared me.
 

MerriedxReldnahc

Sir Richard Pump-A-Loaf
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
FURBYS.
I never liked toys that talked. There's just some kind of uncanny valley feeling about voices coming from inanimate objects, and I really don't want voices coming out of a fat technicolor budgie. I had to put it outside because it wouldn't stop talking to me in the middle of the night and I didn't have a Necronomicon handy.
 

Coldgrip

Still not Cody.
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
FURBYS.
I never liked toys that talked. There's just some kind of uncanny valley feeling about voices coming from inanimate objects, and I really don't want voices coming out of a fat technicolor budgie. I had to put it outside because it wouldn't stop talking to me in the middle of the night and I didn't have a Necronomicon handy.
No joke, but I remember reading in the manual that their image you appear faintly on certain types of TVs. Not sure how that works, but it was mentioned in I think the troubleshooting section of the instructions.
 
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