Cringiest Fedora "Religion?" - Because "I don't believe in God" isn't speshul enough

Qui Vive?

  • Flying Spaghetti Monster

    Votes: 33 19.4%
  • Hail Satan!

    Votes: 23 13.5%
  • Ackshyoually I'm a Buddhist and stuff

    Votes: 11 6.5%
  • Smoke Weed Every Day

    Votes: 8 4.7%
  • *screeching in Disney IP*

    Votes: 23 13.5%
  • Chakats are real!

    Votes: 2 1.2%
  • He can't keep getting away with it hurr hurr hurr

    Votes: 2 1.2%
  • Jesus was a Socialist / of course I haven't read the Bible

    Votes: 36 21.2%
  • "I take Amon Amarth way too seriously"

    Votes: 11 6.5%
  • Implying witchcraft is real

    Votes: 21 12.4%

  • Total voters
    170

ShittyRecolor

Preferred pronouns: shit\shits\shitself
kiwifarms.net
The invisible pink unicorn is actually pretty funny unlike the flying spaghetti monster which is just embarrassing. I've always found the church of the subgenius kind of amusing too.
It is an amusing paradox! Haven't heard of the church of the subgenius before, I'll make sure to check it out.
 

Emperor Julian

kiwifarms.net
At least Tengrism had a small amount of followers in Mongolia never leave it, which like Zoroastrainism immediately makes me take it way more seriously than these pagan "revivals" where they just make shit up then try to claim the heritage of two millenia dead ancestors who they are probably inadvertently insulting by doing so
The ancient pagan faiths where pretty eclectic so most likely arnt going to loose much sleep over dogma breaches, the bigger issue is the one christians run into today-that their prespectives are completly alien.

The biggest problems they face as I see it is the lack of temples, rites and dogma. The whole ecclectic attitude makes it difficult to legitimize since they're unwilling to say to Abrahamics "no you're wrong." instead they focus on breaches of moral code which are irrelivant in such debates.
 

Ped Xing

!Bigfoot! sightings please call 908-314-7784
kiwifarms.net
The only records we have of Norse paganism were written down Centuries into the Christian era.

Greek and Roman religion has a rich selection of primary sources, but the problem there is their religion didn't fulfill the same role as Christianity or Buddhism or most other modern religions. Their gods were not moral teachers; indeed Plato went so far as to call them immoral. They were just stories, which may be part of why they fared so poorly against Christianity while Zoroastrianism, Buddhism, and other religions points east held their ground.

Jove fell to missionaries; Zarathustra fell to the sword, and then only to his knees.
 

Emperor Julian

kiwifarms.net
Greek and Roman religion has a rich selection of primary sources, but the problem there is their religion didn't fulfill the same role as Christianity or Buddhism or most other modern religions. Their gods were not moral teachers; indeed Plato went so far as to call them immoral. They were just stories, which may be part of why they fared so poorly against Christianity while Zoroastrianism, Buddhism, and other religions points east held their ground.

Jove fell to missionaries; Zarathustra fell to the sword, and then only to his knees.
This I'd debate, The Roman/Greek religion flaw was it's common folk origins, it tended to rely on philosophy for moral backing which meant it couldnt really debate theology. It's biggest weakness wasnt it's lack of moral codes but the initial failure of the faith synergise with intellectual trends thanks to early greek philosophers boner for montheism. Their seems to be some indication of an emerging reformation via neoplatonism amoung the intellectual classes in the early 3rd but this was undermined and cut short by the external factor of a Authoritarian state combined with Morally absolutest mystery cult with a real talent for converts.
It's imporant to note that Hellenic paganism didnt simply die on it's own but was gradually erroded, undermined and in some cases, persecuted into oblivion.
We also have to weary of the idea of the story of history-simply because Christianity and Islam ultimatly 'won' doesnt automatically mean this was some sort of inevitability. In the end all that may have stood between "one nation under Zeus." was a dodgy bridge and an Emperor not wearing his chainmail while scouting.
 
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Ghost of Wesley Willis

Whooping Batman's Ass in Heaven
kiwifarms.net
Three way tie between Satanists, Flying Spaghetti Monster, and Jesus was ackshully a socialist.

Satanists are just extremely edgy atheists, FSM exists solely for exceptional redditors to say "fuck you mom", and the "Jesus was a socialist" crowd are just your run of the mill socjus crowd trying to le epicly own their conservative uncle on Facebook.
 
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