Careercow Dan Quinn - Delusional former MMA fighter and potential creator of Cold Fusion (TM)

Yellow Yam Scam

not the kind of boy you're looking for
True & Honest Fan
I'd like to introduce you guys to Dan Quinn. Dan has been an lolcow for quite awhile but is mostly only known in the sort of communities that don't do milking. He's a former MMA fighter who was at one point a very legitimate competitor but apparently he suffered a mental break at some point. Most people theorize that he is suffering from schizophrenia at this point.



The result of this mental break is that he now has a few particular obsessions. One is with a plant called Stevia which he believes to be a miracle drug that will instantly cause you to lose weight, gain strength, have incredible orgasms, get you "wired and ripped" and is even the secret ingredient to creating "cold fusion" or "cold fission". He prefers to snort his stevia. He's convinced that all he needs is a platform to show people the power of Stevia and he will soon be a millionaire.

Learn more from the man himself:

Stevia cures fat, Stevia curates diabates, Stevia cures cancer:

Another obsession of his is what he calls "The Violin." The Violin is a sexual technique that, according to Dan, "updates the Kama Sutra" and "allows females to see a sexual god".





There's more! One of his earliest MMA fights was a loss against Frank Mir, a fighter who went on to have a very successful professional career. He has since spent the past 5 years stalking Frank Mir and challenging him to street fights:

And just to top it off, Dan played football for Notre Dame back in the day but was kicked off the team due to a sexual assault allegation. He constantly refers back to his time playing football and what he calls the "The Greatest Stop In Notre Dame Football History." His also holds a grudge against his former coach, Lou Holtz, accusing him of running a points shaving operation by refusing to let him play.


Now all of these videos so far have been older but that's just to sort of lay the groundwork for the sort of insanity we're dealing with here. He's still active today, challenging random people to fights and engaging in psychotic rants.




For a look at his legal history, here is what Wikipedia has to say about his latest conviction:

Dan was arrested on August 9, 2012 on the charges of Possession of a firearm by a felon and of making death threats. After numerous postponements, Dan was ultimately found "incompetent" to stand trial.[4] On January 3, 2014 Dan was "committed to a state hospital".[5] On March 12, 2014, Dan was returned to the Sacramento County Jail.[4] Dan "retained counsel" on June 12, 2014.[5] His case will go to jury trial on August 5, 2014.[4] Dan was released from jail on August 7, 2014.
Which is basically another way of saying that this lolcow is legitimately dangerous.

Currently he is embroiled in a rivalry of sorts with some a legitimate, no joke biker gang called Vagos. The rivalry mostly consists of Dan making videos about them and them roughing him up on the streets and stealing his "pounds of marijuana." As of late he has been creating sockpuppet accounts on combat sports message boards such as Sherdog and MMAUnderground to defend himself and post referral links to buy Stevia.

He has so many youtube videos that I couldn't possibly highlight them all, so go check them out and pick out some of your favorites.

His current youtube channel:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKuRoB5FVoyc37MGCfCykXw

His former youtube channel:
https://www.youtube.com/user/DanQuinnSteviaFan/videos

Shouts out to @Ziltoid for finding this link to a Wiki about Dan:
http://steviapedia.wikia.com/wiki/Steviapedia_Wiki
 
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Yellow Yam Scam

not the kind of boy you're looking for
True & Honest Fan
Does he have political positions or is he just pro stevia

The extent of his political positions is mostly that he seems to believe that white people who have power are holding down "tha niggas," a group which he thinks includes himself. I haven't heard him say it explicitly but he definitely seems to think that he's like...an honorary black person or something. Lou Holtz, former Notre Dame football coach is one of these white people.

 
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The Lizard Queen

Lizard boobs. Your argument is invalid.
One is with a plant called "Stevia" which he believes to be a miracle drug that will instantly cause you to lose weight, gain strength, have incredible orgasms, get you "wired and ripped" and is even the secret ingredient to creating "cold fusion" or "cold fission"

Judging from his physical appearance, Stevia seems to cause hunchback, fat neck, beer belly, and narrow shoulders.

I don't know if it helps with orgasm. That might also be the cold fusion he talks about. Maybe if he had sex with a reactor?
 

XYZpdq

fbi most wanted sskealeaton
True & Honest Fan
Maybe he can fight that crazy guy from Rocky V who cured his aids or never had aids or whatever.
 

Yellow Yam Scam

not the kind of boy you're looking for
True & Honest Fan

Dan tries to pitch snorting Stevia to E-40. He also discusses ancient aliens.

"I'm sure there's a black scientist at one of these black universities that will validate that Stevia splits water into a natural gas. I think that natural gas - it's white, it charges different. I think probably uh, power elegant space ship engines. They don't seem to stop by a gas station too much. Or maybe that's what they were doing here, to load up on hydrogen to burn it all over the universe. Anyway, my nigga..."
 

RepQuest

Unfunny
"I'm sure there's a black scientist at one of these black universities that will validate that Stevia splits water into a natural gas. I think that natural gas - it's white, it charges different. I think probably uh, power elegant space ship engines. They don't seem to stop by a gas station too much. Or maybe that's what they were doing here, to load up on hydrogen to burn it all over the universe. Anyway, my nigga..."
 

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