Skitzocow Dana Marie Cain / Oracle of Venus / The Scorpion - Divorced Batshit Space Demon Waitress with NPD, Gangstalked by Alphabet Agencies, "Pretending to be Rеtarded", #SaveJoelIrish

DuckDuckGo

Just a little creecher situation type deal
kiwifarms.net
In which Dana tries to add some clarity to her poor plot before, fails completely, ends up turning the focus on how pathetic and stupid Mike is to shore up her "Well he believes this crap" angle, continues to hint that Mike's family already hates her stupid ass and just continues to not explain anything because she knows she can't lie very well. (2/10) For a video containing a schizo in a parking lot ranting, it sure is kind of boring, some great smug faces though.

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Looks like the same clothes as yesterday, because Dana is nasty.
Sperging out in the car again. (Is it more or less sad that it isn't moving?)
Dana looks like the fucking Demogorgon from DBD.
The best thing about Mike is "meeting him, well it answered a lot of questions..."
(That's good, because Dana is clearly too stupid to ask any.)
Dana pretends to care about Mike's story.
"Well, he's got a story that makes mine seem like a walk in the park... by comparison." - Dana "Easy Mode" Marie
Smug bitch face ensues.
Mike is drinking Dana's Kool-Aid, so to speak.
"Oh he believes... what I told him..." - Dana "Hostage Crisis" Marie (#FreeMike)
Detective Polish Mike spent time investigating Dana's boring accusations.
"I couldn't make this story up." - Dana, still looking for a ghost writer
All this crap that Dana is too bored to even explain totally happened, you guiz!
"He's very kind, and very generous..." - Dana "Eyes On The Prize" Marie
Dana likes Mike because he used to be suicidal before they met. (Kind of a reverse order compared to her other fucks over the years.)
"It was real bad..." - Dana, on suicidal depression
Dana's magical antidepressant filled vagina.
"He's planning his future, not his funeral." - Dana "BetterHelp" Marie
"And he gives me credit!" - Dana, who manages to make someone else's suicide plans all about her
Dana dindu nuffin, Mike sees through the lies. (Although not the ones Dana doesn't want him to, clearly.)
"And I got screwed over, real bad... real bad." - Dana, a bad screw in any sense of the term
Dana has decided that she's going to roll with the "medical malpractice" storyline for at least a bit longer.
(My guess, Mike was bitching about his back again, Dana breaks out the I LITERALLY DIED story because fuck caring about other people.)
There are no accidents in Danaland, but also everyone still hates Dana in Danaland.
(HOW THE FUCK IS HAVING A DEPRESSIVE EPISODE YEARS AFTER YOUR SURGERY "intended to look like a surgical complication")
(And even if Dana means the bulimia which was only addressed 9 months after, that was because Dana was an idiot who can't take any advice and fucked her own stuff up.)
Do the glowies usually use surgery to assassinate people?
Dana recovered from her assassination attempt. (Glowie sure is inefficient, ain't he?)
"And I was in the best shape of my life!" - Dana "Bulemia" Marie
Dana ran 3 miles a day, you know, as you do when you think you're dangerously underweight...
"Seriously considering, seeking a career with Mercedes." - Dana "Hooker Headers" Marie
(So, my best guess is Dana put her stupid ass in the ICU after realizing but never accepting that Mercedes Man didn't want to fuck her for money.)
Dana perfectly describes the thought process of someone with a severe eating disorder, then acts indignant about getting drugged when she was having one of her episodes.
Joel is the reason Dana is on KiwiFarms.
More about Dana banging the subdivision.
"And apparently, had some sort of, investigatory, role..." - Dana "Sherlock" Marie, accusing Joel of being a spy
"He ended up with my, best friend at the time, but he was real interested in me!" - Dana, who forgot that she said Joel was gay
Dana demands answers to questions she's too stupid or afraid to ask.
Dana was paranoid from the start.
"And if there was some nefarious plot..." - Dana, when recounting literally any event in her life
Joel was sent by the commodore to cover up medical errors which Dana alleges exist.
"Oh, I made a stink about it." - Dana, who clearly hasn't showered today
"I wasn't shy about, callin' these people out..." - Dana "Libel" Marie
Dana is a victim of everything but her own boundless retardation and failure.
Dana doesn't know what stalking is.
Glowie needs to call up KiwiFarms to get people to stop noticing what a tard Dana is.
Dana accidentally stabs herself in the lip with a straw whilst trying to make a smug drinking face.
Mike loves Dana, Mike is a stalker, Mike didn't give Dana an option and just said they were getting married. (Yep, that's not a red flag at all...)
Dana pretends she turned Mike down.
"I was focused on my career, I was focused on my job, all I wanted was to make money." (BITCH, YOU WORKED AT 7/11 AND BIG LOTS, YOUR SUPERIORS WERE PROBABLY 20 YEARS YOUNGER THAN YOU.)
"Crawl my way out of this fuckin hole I was put in." - Dana "Front Hole" Marie, taking Mike down with her
Dana pretends to have self-doubt by retconning history after Mike wouldn't take no for an answer.
(I wonder if Mike has stalked other women in the past...)
Dana has a chance to get back her undefined something.
Dana dindu nuffin, glowie ruined her future.
Dana defends her decision to act like a retard on the internet.
"I was on the cusp, of greatness." - Dana, who almost made more than minimum wage that one time 🥳
Everything is Skip's fault.
Almost a title drop.
"There's lots of people who had promising lives, promising careers, and they knew something, that was... they were deemed a threat because of something they knew."
(In short: Dana isn't the first victim or her smoothbrained narcissism and general retardation.)
"Nobody believes a crazy person, do they?" - Dana, almost getting it
"They can't kill you, killing you would be too messy, well, ya know..." - Dana "Deathsquad" Marie
"All they've gotta do is declare you mentally incompetent and no one will believe you..." - Dana "Case Study" Marie, who self-declares on a daily basis
Dana's brain hits a pothole as the word salad starts and she struggles to rein in her plotlines.
(Funny how alcoholism is a bad thing and even Dana has said in the past that it destroys families, but still insists on blaming glowie despite living off Jägermeister.)
"A bunch of fuckin' professional trolls from the internet..." - Dana "Queen of the Trolls" Marie
"I think I pretty much summed up, what happened." (If that made sense to anyone who isn't Dana, please get help.)
"And, ya, I'm a little sensitive..."
Dana goes all YOU'RE ALL AGAINST ME, but in her usual manner of boring confusion so it isn't funny yet.
Glowie's evil plot is to destroy Dana's shitty marriage. (Which is going to be accomplished by our trashen queen any day now.)
"I know who I am and I know where I've been and I know, what's happened to me, and I take nothing for granted, nothing and no one." - Dana, who has already cost Mike at least $6,000
Mike's story is super serious, you guiz!
More flexing about Mike being suicidal, I'm sure he fucking loves that, Dana.
"And anybody who cares about him, well, why would they want to get in the way of that..." - Dana, already having burned bridges with Mike's family
"I don't want anything, from Michael, just his love and his loyalty." (And his mother's ring, the use of his kid as a bargaining chip, a motorcycle and enough wine to drown in.)
"I earn my own money, I pay for my own shit." (So when are you going to pay back Mike for the ATV and dental surgery?)
"I don't take anything from Michael, without giving back... I pay my own way." - Dana, who expects Mike to pay her for sex
Rise of the domestic goddess. (You can't cook worth shit, Dana.)
More about Mike's bad back, dood, I'm sure Mike's workplace would love to hear about him supposedly being so injured he shouldn't be working.
Dana considers marriage to her to be "a normal life".
Dana might be exaggerating things, says Mike was "left to die" while he was in bed for a year after his undefined accident.
(Hey Dana, Mike has friends and has openly said he gets his stupid kid to do shit for him.)
"His poor son, just a young kid at the time." (This is where Dana's non-linear storytelling makes shit really confusing.)
Mike didn't believe in his broken back, got bored and somehow taught himself how to walk.
Trashdad is the best.
(Seriously, what fucking idiot refers to their spouse as "generous", there is no way to make that sound good.)
Don't question Dana's shitty intentions.
"I'm a really serious woman, I raised my kids..." - Dana "Motherhood" Marie, sadly not taking the opportunity to shit on Alex one more time
"I got a resume..." - Dana, regarding her vagina
"There's proof that I was extremely competent, capable, successful, woman, a wife and a mother." - Dana "Grammar" Marie
Dana is mad Skip probably never read her shitty book.
Nobody can say Dana wasn't devoted to her family. (But they all can say you were more devoted to yourself, booze and infidelity more.)
"He left me for dead, he tossed me aside after twenty years like a pair of dirty fuckin' socks..." - Dana, recounting that story where she ruined Skip's career by harassing his boss for no reason
Steph, Skip and Joel are the enemies of the Danaverse because they have friends.
(There is no way a narc like Dana actually listened to Mike's story, she can't name anything from it and has invoked it like 5 times to say she isn't a liar because reasons.)
Dana is too uncoordinated to operate a straw, she keeps on spilling iced coffee out her mouth.
Glowie has to go away because Dana says so.
"NOW it has to go away, now it has to stop, cuz... well, it just does." - Dana, in another flawless argument demonstrating her first grade education
Totes getting married.
More indignation as Dana fails to notice that conflating marriage with "getting back everything that was taken from me" makes her look like a gold-digging whore.
All of Dana's vague personality and physical traits are coming back, you guiz!
"This guy deserves a happy ending too." - Dana "Me Love You Long Time" Marie
"And, I mean to give it to him..." - Dana, who still hasn't solved the Shandy problem
More presumed sex, yadda, yadda.
Fin.
 

DuckDuckGo

Just a little creecher situation type deal
kiwifarms.net
She is so trying to sell herself in these videos, although, she fails to realize you cannot sell garbage...
There are a couple of angles to take with this, Dana being well and truly on the spectrum seems like the type to try and mash a bunch of plots together, or never have a clear goal in the first place. I think the main thing is Dana trying to deal with Mike's family, the bitching about conspiracy stuff probably started as a pity party, but Dana is such a rude little asshole that she couldn't make it sound genuine in the slightest. Failing that, Dana is probably trying to turn Mike against his family, she really wants a co-dependent relationship where she can get drunk on the couch, never be called on to do anything and get fucked in the ass whilst larping as the goddess of garbage.

I really hope that Barb joins up and adds to the thread, I can only imagine the fucking DMs that Dana sent her the moment there was even one whiff of skepticism.
 

CrazyAsHell

Tami Hess
kiwifarms.net
This bitch thinks that Joel wants her. Said that Broke Back Mike can take him anytime; even on Joel's best day. DANA....JOEL DOES NOT WANT YOU. She keeps saying "the information I am getting". FROM WHO Dana????

Fucking 10 AM and this bitch is already got a full glass of wine. But...no. I am not an alcoholic. More "aren't I just fucking wonderful" bullshit. BBM has had HUNDREDS of women. Who the fuck thinks that's a good thing? Dana, you are doing an awesome job at forging a great relationship with his fam. If he had even half a brain, his ass would run now and never stop.
 

Attachments

  • yt1s.com - Im just soaking it up_360p.mp4
    29.8 MB · Views: 0

SuzyCC

kiwifarms.net
This bitch thinks that Joel wants her. Said that Broke Back Mike can take him anytime; even on Joel's best day. DANA....JOEL DOES NOT WANT YOU. She keeps saying "the information I am getting". FROM WHO Dana????

Fucking 10 AM and this bitch is already got a full glass of wine. But...no. I am not an alcoholic. More "aren't I just fucking wonderful" bullshit. BBM has had HUNDREDS of women. Who the fuck thinks that's a good thing? Dana, you are doing an awesome job at forging a great relationship with his fam. If he had even half a brain, his ass would run now and never stop.
LOL. Hilarious she is still beaming in messages from Joel. Joel Irish still needs saving. Still on her mind 24/7. Promiscuity and violence are apparently qualities to admire in Danaland. I'm glad she's still making videos despite what Mike probably wants. I wonder when the Facebook is coming back. Man her liver must be testing bad by this time, damn. She continues to look unhealthy - don't see a lengthy life for her.
 

DuckDuckGo

Just a little creecher situation type deal
kiwifarms.net
In which Dana makes a 25 minute video mostly about things she says she doesn't care about, still wishes Joel fucked her, continues to try and manipulate Mike's retardation, but at this point it's hard to tell who's fucking who over. Dana is drunk at like 10AM, so I think she finally sold Mike on her "Domestic Goddess" crap. (2/10) Any video with Dana's vagina spergery is always a hard watch, the most interesting thing is that Mike has now stuck her in the crackshed to make her butthurt rants, unless she wants to start drinking and driving again.

No description, blocked comments and ratings.
25 MINUTES!!!
Unfinished living room set, in front of the wall with papered up insulation.
(Should be noted that Mike either papered over the studs, or they're spaced more than 16 inches apart, either way this is probably a building code violation.)
Dana is wearing the same tanktop and bra 3 days in a row because she's nasty.
Dana's fivehead continues to be the victim of her inability to find a camera angle that works.
"You... can't... mess with him, Joel." - Dana, clearly constipated from 2 days with no death threats
More staring headlong into the camera like a mentally impaired deer in the headlights.
Polish Mike = A legitimate badass
"Not even on your best day, could you take him. Not even on your best day." - Dana "Gay Basher" Marie
Dana's brain is running exceptionally slow today.
Nobody can touch Polish Mike! (Far be it from the fact that nobody but Dana ever wanted to...)
Dana takes a drag on her ciggie. Having sucked on more fags than Joel ever did.
"You can't stand, to watch me, move on..." - Dana "Projection" Marie, on the man that got a restraining order on her stupid ass 8 years ago.
"Bet you can't stop it." - Dana "Losing Game" Marie
"You can't stop this..." (Dana, I'd ask if you were alright, but I already know you aren't.)
The voices in Dana's head tell her that Joel is the crazy one.
Mike is still a legitimate badass.
More mixing phrases and empty threats.
"What do you gotta say to that? Not much, I wager." - Dana "Plot Hole Goatse" Marie
Mike is 1000% all-in on Dana's sperging.
Mike is a legitimate badass for the 3rd time in just over 2 minutes.
"They make movies and write books about guys like this... But not you, Joel..." - Dana "First Blood" Marie
Joel isn't the hero in some book Dana can't read.
"I, don't know why you did it." (What is "it"?)
Dana has anonymous sources for her excuse to shit on Joel for no reason. (Read: Dana)
"I might figure it out in time, but... Time might tell all..."
Dana is drinking her candle holder full of wine, at like 10 AM... (Totally not an alcoholic.)
Dana "Dr. Who-re" Marie tries making some clever metaphor/whatever the fuck about time.
Dana doesn't care about the haters, seems to be trying to use that to intimidate Joel.
"I don't think it's gonna end well for you..." - Dana, still with 21 minutes to kill
Dana continues to cite her wine-addled brain for weird alternative histories.
"I don't know what to believe, I've never really known what to believe about you, Joel." - Dana "LARP" Marie
Joel = Temporary Satan
"And it was serious." - Dana, who might have gotten a hug that one time
"I'm just glad I survived it..." - Dana, who has never overstated anything in the history of ever
Meeting Michael "Cleared up a lotta shit for [Dana]" (Read: Now she can drink wine and make someone else do laundry.)
Dana has had a profound effect on lots of men. (If you know what I mean...)
"Men seem, buy and large, throughout my life, men have reacted to me, pretty strongly..." - Dana "Magic Whore" Marie
"Going all the way back to 11." - Dana "Pedofork" Marie
Nobody expects Polish Mike!
Dana goes to close the door, presumably afraid Mike will hear her calling him a pussy.
(Dana seems to literally be recording videos out of Mike's tardshed, because Mike "Plinkett" Halgas is now canon.)
Dana pretends she's hard to get.
Still thinks Joel and Niles want her withered vagina.
Dana defines Joel and Niles' responses as "weird", given one of them fell in with meth psychosis and the other got a restraining order, it doesn't seem weird at all.
Dana continues to tell people how they feel.
Mike ain't a glowie because Dana isn't used to men she doesn't have to inflict herself on.
"That's, that sounds a little rapey, and I appologize, Michael, and I appologize to your family, but... I'm here by choice." - Dana, confirming that she does have a rape fetish
More about Mike not having a reason to live before Dana came in and drank all his wine.
Dana's lie detector sucks, given that Mike is probably out right now fucking someone with a functioning frontal lobe.
Mike is a horndog.
"He's a legend in the bedroom. His exploits are... they could make a movie." - Dana, who wants to bring back Drone Man to film another porno for the NSA
"Oh my God, talk about, knowing women..." - Dana, who knows a lot of men
More pussy talk from Dana "Meatflaps" Marie. 🤮
(Mike settled for very little...)
"There's no backing out and there's no going back..." - Dana "Purgatory" Marie
"Oh, once you're in, you're in, there's no going back, oh, you'll never be the same, ask Joel, ask Niles, once you're in, well, you're always in..." - Dana, the thing that scared off H.P Lovecraft
"There's no escape..." - Dana "Stockholm Syndrome" Marie
Dana's vagina is the Matrix, or some shit.
Fuck you, Joel and Niles!
More about Mike being "generous".
Dana is annoyed at the adjustment period.
Dana is an adult, you guiz!
Dana has yet to learn how to negotiate.
"You learn how to negotiate relationships if you've been in one long enough, or had enough of them, which..." *SNORT* "Michael certainly has..." - Dana, who has the self-awareness of a sheet of plywood
"He really likes my pussy... and, I can't stress how much this actually matters, considering..." - Dana, considering her nature as a slutbag
More shitting on Joel and Niles, more about Dana's magic vagina/DNA/pheromones.
Dana looks bored as shit talking about her heavenly-inspired vagina.
Back to common ground, the Bananalore.
Banana is the whore too which all winos can aspire to.
Dana is totally moving on, you guiz!
Mike = twice the man Joel ever was
Mike is "worth restoring", implying that Joel isn't, via one of Dana's circuitous death threats.
Dana has to "unlock" Mike, whatever the fuck that means.
Dana's entire worldview is hinging on the opinion of one person she describes as mentally ill, placating her larping for sex.
Mike was woke to Banana before meeting Dana.
Something about sniffing.
"And I wonder how many others, I have awakened..." - Dana "Insomnia" Marie
Dana appears to be a fugly schizo because the goddess powers don't work on video.
Dana doesn't like being touched by strange men. (Could have fooled me, Ho!)
Dana is or isn't special because she pretends that people want to sexually harass her.
"I wish it were just garden variety sexual harassment..." - Dana "Weinstein" Marie
Joel and Niles are basic bitches compared to the trashmaster.
Dana's brainwashing of a man with suicidal depression is continuing well on schedule.
Joel has to FIGURE IT OUT!™
Dana denies being hung up on Joel, projects that onto Joel alongside her shitty life.
"Why are you being such a spaz over me, Joel?" (I wonder what color the sky is in Danaland...)
Funny that if we're to assume anything Dana said is true, it still means that Joel won by confusing the shit out of her.
"Maybe I should have just asked you... you'd have had to tell me..." - Dana "0069" Marie
Dana was a massive simp for Joel. (And still totally is...)
Dana blames herself, then seems to blame Joel.
"I think I already knew the answer, maybe..." (I'd kill to see Dana on a gameshow...)
Dana is totally moving on, you guiz!
"It will not do me any good if he doesn't get better." - Dana "Benevolence" Marie
"I have a theory, I wanna prove it..." *SNORT* "I know what I believe and I wanna prove it!" - Dana "Scientific Meth-head" Marie
Mike is a simp, Dana is overjoyed that she's now a hostage, as per her rape fetish.
"He gets high from my nearness." (Or it just reminds him of a dumpster in July.)
Dana accuses Joel and Niles of this stupid contact high crap.
(Dana has given at least 4 different reasons to explain Niles' heart attack by now.)
(Because cocaine never hurt anyone if Dana wasn't there...)
Dana is scared of her own narc powertrip.
Niles was basically collateral damage for Dana's festering vaghole.
A mosquito lands on Dana's massive forehead.
More about Mike's poetry, Dana still isn't going to read it probably because she's lying again.
(Is there any evidence that Mike is still alive, Dana is laying it on really thick here.)
Dana is a literal cumsponge.
Dana still doesn't understand how marriage works, possibly because Mike clearly has some fucking issues.
Dana and Mike are destined to be together forever because they've been together for a couple months.
Some noise in the background, probably Hunter?
Dana made Mike feel like a man. (Because that's totally not how emasculating someone works...)
Man, man, manly men, man.
Mike's fragile ego demands that Dana continue to at least pretend to be nice to him for wine money.
"And he'll do anything... to make sure that... I always admire him, that I always love him, he'll correct any mistake, any error in judgement..." - Dana, live from yet another totally deserved abusive relationship
Mike wins because he's also a violent retard like Dana.
Dana thinks all the glowies want to fuck her.
Everyeone else on the planet is smart enough to not want to screw Dana.
Mike is going to be the first man to die of simping.
"When people are appreciated, they'll do even more than they're asked, simple management 101." - Dana, who still won't do the fucking laundry, cook or clean
"Because they enjoy, being appreciated, and they enjoy, their efforts being appreciated." - Dana, who trades blowjobs for shitty wine
"Not his typical, bimbo girlfriend..." - Dana, who has somehow lowered the bar even more than previously thought possible
"I challenge him every day, you bet your ass I do." - Dana, teaching Mike how to dodge empty wine bottles being chucked at his head
Dana won't take any excuses from Mike on the basis of how she actively tries to rewrite his personality. (What a fucking hero...)
(Hey Dana, when is Mike going to not excuse the fact that you're completely useless at everything you claim to be too good to do?)
Dana breaks out the scale of respect. (Disregarding the fact that Dana doesn't respect herself or others, so her claimed respect is completely useless to people.)
Dana ain't fraid!
"And I'm not afraid, to own any of it!" - Dana, who still won't acknowledge Joel's restraining order
"So, that just makes me a better person overall." *SNORT* - Dana "Debate Club" Marie
Dana pretends she ever explained anything.
Dana doesn't have to listen to criticism when it makes more sense than her shitty plots.
Sounds like someone is opening the door, Dana quickly kills the video.
Fin.
 

07.

https://archive.ph/
kiwifarms.net
She's like a parody of a real women, or how a tranny would act if they were a bio woman, down to the unlady like language. and she has a new video.
 

SuzyCC

kiwifarms.net
She's like a parody of a real women, or how a tranny would act if they were a bio woman, down to the unlady like language. and she has a new video.
She's been guzzling wine all day, her teeth are falling out and purple. Probably hasn't eaten all day. Boy Mike, she's getting even sicker since she's been with you.
 
  • Horrifying
Reactions: 07.

DuckDuckGo

Just a little creecher situation type deal
kiwifarms.net
In which Dana, still trapped in the crackshed seemingly having spent all day drinking and laughing to herself like the fucking Joker, has repurposed her whole "The Navy wants to fuck me" plotline into The Army wanting that (LOL, No.), Mike is probably going to be pretty fucking pissed when he sees this one (Assuming he's still allowed to have any emotions.) (6/10) Actually repurposing one of her better plotlines, this relationship really should be over soon, but God knows Dana will find some way to blame her whorish nature on "Da haters!".

No description, blocked comments and ratings.
Live from the crackshed!
Dana finally managed to change her shirt. I guess that bitch Mike finally did laundry.
"So, I'm pretty sure, that I met an Army Ranger today... Like, active duty..." (I wonder where this shit is going...)
Dana is certain, much like every other time in her life she's been wrong.
There are no accidents in Danaland, because there is no world without our entitled wino.
"The CEO of the company I work for... has Ranger training... and an Army Ranger, I'm, almost certain Army Ranger..." - Dana, planning to cuck Mike for someone who can afford wine that comes in bottles
(I think Dana means Bruce K. Thorn, the CEO of Big Lots. She's apparently not wrong that he's ranger certified, but she's going to go retarded with this, as always...)
Dana suspects someone of being an Army Ranger because they used her line at the store.
"Everybody else needs to sit down and shut the fuck up. Because, you just do..." - Dana "Dunce Corner" Marie
Nobody has jurisdiction over Dana's weird sexual fantasies with Big Lots customers.
"This is big, and no, it'll never make the news." (IDK, "Local Woman Gives Entire Big Lots HPV" would be a good headline.)
"It's not for public consumption..." (But apparently the rest of Dana's boring as fuck life story is?)
Dana is dusting off her delusion of the whole of the Navy wanting to fuck her and just swapping in the Army instead.
Dana would like to thank The Academy for this, the most recent of uninspired plotlines.
"I really do know what I'm doing. I'm, making, great, strides here, not just, personally, but I think... I think there's something more at stake here..." (Even in the Danaverse this isn't newsworthy...)
It's bigger than a semi-homeless wino, you guiz!
"I mean, I could be wrong, this could all just be one, super random! But extremely serendipitous coincidence that, really, doesn't make any sense."
Dana "Debate Club" Marie gives 2 options: The entire Army wants to fuck her or they don't but this delusion is still magical because Dana can't understand statistics.
(I choose option C: Dana is a boring whore.)
Nothing makes sense to Dana unless she puts her fake-religion into it.
Dana continues to not give any evidence.
"He was very handsome, oh he was very handsome..." - Dana, back to giving blowies in the parking lot because Mike slashed her wine budget again, probably
"I wish we had more like him." - Dana, who totally isn't a slut
Dana wishes the US was full of people that looked like Mat Best.
"These guys are, delicious!"
(Oh, Dana is so getting her ass beat tonight...)
Dana is so drunk she can't keep the camera stable, zooms in on her awful hairline.
Mike is kinda cool too, I guess...
"You don't know how strong, you are until, being strong is, all there is to be..." - Dana "Banana Strong" Marie, inventing a new slogan
Dana is constantly in life or death situations, or something, IDK.
"I'd rather die with honor, than life with disgrace, right?" - Dana "Klingon" Marie, regarding her plans to dispose of Mike
"Well, I'd rather, live with honor, and just not die..." - Dana, who is totally immortal, but still a shitty person
Dana doesn't understand how morality and honor work. (Because she doesn't have any.)
Dana burps in the middle of her "Cause a fair's a carnival and life's not a carnival."
Quick pause to sell that line/avoid vomiting.
Dana requires a plan to make Mike younger.
"Dood, PC. TOO PC!" - Dana "Woke" Marie
Onto covering her ass with Mike, even though she wasn't inspired by him being attractive.
Dana has entered the manic phase of her disorder.
Laughs at Mike's stories.
(If this were a person with a healthy range of emotions, this would look exactly like a hostage video.)
Dana thanks the ceiling/Jesus for giving her someone new to cheat on.
"I know, right? Like, I'm a crazy bitch, I should be running in the other direction, but, nope, this is THE BOMB!" - Dana, running for the other erection
Dana's face looks like a prolapsed anus when she laughs.
Still disturbed.
Still creepy.
More work to be done until Dana breaks Mike completely into her eternal laundry-bitch. (#FreeMike)
"I can keep him, if you let me keep him." - Dana, literally too dumb to know which direction this hostage situation is going
Dana can help Mike, you guiz! (Given Dana is so borderline in terms of functioning, gonna press X there, Bananafucker.)
"As long as you guys don't cockblock, I can help him." - Dana, passive aggressively going after Mike's family again by talking about Barb's brother's penis
(I'm still utterly stumped which one of these is going to kill the other. Given Mike doesn't appear to own any firearms, Mike is at least physically safe from her drunken wrath.)
Ends the video mid snortlaugh.
Fin.
 

Attachments

  • yt1s.com - I love him I really do.mp4
    31.1 MB · Views: 0

WonderWino

kiwifarms.net
DuckDuckGo said:
In which Dana, still trapped in the crackshed seemingly having spent all day drinking and laughing to herself like the fucking Joker, has repurposed her whole "The Navy wants to fuck me" plotline into The Army wanting that

I wonder how long it will be before she twists that around in her drunken crackhead brain and starts claiming those annual army vs navy football games are the two services competing over which one gets to fuck her for the year
 

CrazyAsHell

Tami Hess
kiwifarms.net
I see she has already taken it down. I got money saying Mike or one of his family members saw it and he threw a fit. She CLAIMS he LOVES all her vids but I can't imagine anyone finding the things she says and does on camera to be anywhere close to acceptable OR sane.

I, as well as all of you, can clearly see the writing on the wall here. This great romance is circling the drain quickly. The end of this, being that would leave her homeless, is bound to be legendary.
 

SeniorFuckFace

Fucking Fuck Fuck
kiwifarms.net
I see she has already taken it down. I got money saying Mike or one of his family members saw it and he threw a fit. She CLAIMS he LOVES all her vids but I can't imagine anyone finding the things she says and does on camera to be anywhere close to acceptable OR sane.

I, as well as all of you, can clearly see the writing on the wall here. This great romance is circling the drain quickly. The end of this, being that would leave her homeless, is bound to be legendary.
This is her last shot, she will be going out kicking and screaming, for sure...
 

SeniorFuckFace

Fucking Fuck Fuck
kiwifarms.net
Ooofff..

20210621_063003.jpg
 

CrazyAsHell

Tami Hess
kiwifarms.net
Trying the "I am a Christian and an Ordained Minister" angle for BBM. Almost 45 long fucking boring mins. of bible shit. I admit I didn't watch it all. She is trying to insert Inanna and all that bullshit into the bible.

Edit: Caught the last two mins. IF we want to get "right with God" then we have to go thru her.

Nah....I'm good DD
 

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