Hambubger
It's just pretend
Why not continue the festivities with a roastTess Holliday
Guests:
Theme:
- Meme Roth
- @Tesshollidaysflupaknees
- A former fan that lost weight
- 10 non-white Trump supporters
- A registered dietitian
- A personal trainer that is against FA
- 5 male models that aren’t attracted to Tess at all
Venue:
- Health and fitness
- No cellphones allowed
- You are muted if you bring up anything related to social justice
- If you powerlevel, you need to shovel cow manure for half an hour each time you do so
- If you complain, you have to walk 300 feet each time you do so
Decor:
- Barn that has been repurposed
Attire:
- The inside of the barn will look like a cafeteria
- Fancy dishes are present
- Any dish you use, you have to wash by hand and fetch the water from the well
- Bright fluorescent lights designed to wash you out and bring out any imperfection
- Mirrors are everywhere
Food:
- The only clothes allowed have to be torn, stained and old. In other words, perfect for doing outdoor work
- No makeup allowed
- Hair cannot be straightened, curled or done up in any way besides a simple clip or ponytail
- No nice shoes, tennis shoes only
- No shapewear underneath clothes
- All shirts cannot show cleavage, back or shoulders
- Shorts have to be knee length
Drinks:
- High fat low sugar
- Appetizer consists of farm fresh creamy tomato soup with no crackers/sandwiches
- Main course is steak and veggies. No extra salt or sauces allowed
- You cannot get seconds if you have hit your daily calorie allotment
- There is no dessert
- No alcohol
- No soda, coffee, juice or tea
- tard cum is allowed, but you have to tard cum the cow first
- Water is from a well