Did Bob baby Chris? -

[PeppyMccloud]

Given the generation Bob Chandler came from Im surprised he put up with Chris' nonsense!

From what I've heard, people born pre 1945 are tougher parents, and put up with less nonsense than do boomers and post boomers.

Why do you think he never insisted on really working with Chris to try and improve him? Was he too old and tired by the time Chris' problems became known? Was he just too old-fashioned and did not have the "wherewithal" to deal with something as unusual as autism?

Or was he just kind of a lazy, negligent guy?

 

[ChurchOfGodBear]

Given the generation Bob Chandler came from Im surprised he put up with Chris' nonsense!

From what I've heard, people born pre 1945 are tougher parents, and put up with less nonsense than do boomers and post boomers.

Why do you think he never insisted on really working with Chris to try and improve him? Was he too old and tired by the time Chris' problems became known? Was he just too old-fashioned and did not have the "wherewithal" to deal with something as unusual as autism?

Or was he just kind of a lazy, negligent guy?

You might want to read up a bit more on Bob. I'm thinking you've glossed over a lot of the cases where Bob did push Chris, however ineffectively.

 

[CalmMyTits]

The antics of a permissive parent can easily undo the work that an authoritarian parent tries to enforce on a child. It wasn't Bob who babied Chris, it was Barb.

We have examples of Bob trying to discipline Chris (pointing him to getting a CADD degree, yelling at him) but from what we have seen I think it is safe to conclude that Barb pretty much undid any discipline or good Bob tried to do.

 

[PeppyMccloud]

Tho Bob probably did that too.

I have read that since they were old people, Barb and Bob didn't trust mental health, perhaps thinking it was "shameful."

Keep in mind Bob discouraged Chris from finding a job, and never did much meaningful to help him with employment skills.

I still find it hard that for a guy who grew up in the Great Depression, Bob would have let Chris go to pot as much as Chris has.

I also find it remarkable how much Chris resembles Barb and not Bob, none of his positive traits (intelligence, curiosity, many interests etc) but only his negative ones ( racism and homophobia)

 

[Asperchu_Super_Fan]

Given the generation Bob Chandler came from Im surprised he put up with Chris' nonsense!

From what I've heard, people born pre 1945 are tougher parents, and put up with less nonsense than do boomers and post boomers.

Yelling at kids only does so much (and it's a horrible way to actually get your kids to do anything), it probably contributed more to DA STRESS and Chris's needing cuddle time with Barb.

The parents were much tougher people, and although they punished harder, they invested more in their children. Look at David Chandler and Patricia Chandler (BOTH doctors). Bob was probably a decent disciplinarian, but was retarded in that he didn't get Chris special education for his autism.

Of course, Snorlax only poured gas on the fire.

 

[Christ-Chan]

I also find it remarkable how much Chris resembles Barb and not Bob, none of his positive traits (intelligence, curiosity, many interests etc) but only his negative ones ( racism and homophobia)

Chris pretty much just wants to become Barbara so he can find his own Robert and they'll be a family again.

 

[ChurchOfGodBear]

Keep in mind Bob discouraged Chris from finding a job, and never did much meaningful to help him with employment skills.

The only reason Chris's name ever appeared on a paycheck at all was BECAUSE of Bob. Bob was also the reason Chris pursued education past high school.

I still find it hard that for a guy who grew up in the Great Depression, Bob would have let Chris go to pot as much as Chris has.

You're really cherry-picking your facts here. Bob was horribly misguided in how he went about encouraging Chris, but the effort was clearly there.

 

[Fapcup]

Considering Bobs other kids did pretty well for themselves, he can't have been an awful parent, though I suppose even the best child rearing skills can be in vain with Barb co parenting.

We also know that he did push him quite a bit to get his degree, job, etc.

So why did he finally give up, and make him get on the tugboat? He was ooold, but more importantly: Living close to Chris for two decades, the fact that his son is as dumb as a doorknob, couldn't have escaped his attention.

We know what an imbecile Chris is, from a couple of hours of videos. Imagine how well you'd know what a dumbass he is, if you LIVED with him for years...

 

[Dork Of Ages]

You should remember that in Bob's generation, people with mental disorders were considered by most people to be "crazy loonies" that should be locked away. While Bob raised his other children alright, it's quite likely that he had problems over taking care of a child with autism, even if he tried to instill discipline in Chris' thick skull. That and Barb's hard work in babying and cuddling her little snowflake made OPL that we all love and hate.

 

[CatParty]

op asks as if there isn't babying still happening.

 

[Fapcup]

You should remember that in Bob's generation, people with mental disorders were considered by most people to be "crazy loonies" that should be locked away. While Bob raised his other children alright, it's quite likely that he had problems over taking care of a child with autism, even if he tried to instill discipline in Chris' thick skull. That and Barb's hard work in babying and cuddling her little snowflake made OPL that we all love and hate.

True...

The biggest damage Bob did, was ignoring Chris was not "quick in the mind", and his refusal to get Chris the help he needed. It was probably a result of the stigma there was against mental problems among people of his generation.

But inadvertently, by mainstreaming him, and pretending he was (almost) like other kids, Bob ended up doing a lot of damage, and probably cost Chris his only chance at a pretty normal life.

 

[CatParty]

funnily enough, bob was the better of the shitty parents.

 

[CalmMyTits]

I don't think that the mainstreaming itself was harmful to Chris. Some of the Sped kids in my school were mainstreamed part of the time, for certain classes, and had others in the Sped classroom, depending on their needs and how much counseling/homework assistance/accommodation they needed. It seems that Chris had this kind of education, part time in Sped class and part time in whatever class (namely art) but discipline starts at home, and it has been well-established that Barb is the biggest problem in Chris' life. A poorly-behaving child in school can't really be helped if this behavior is not punished at home.

Also, it was recently discussed in another thread that Bob yelled at Chris a lot, and that Barb sometimes left the room to let her husband yell at Chris and that Chris would feel himself freeze up mentally and what not. I think it's safe to say there was no babying here (from Bob) and by the time he got chris on SSDI, like another poster pointed out, we know Chris' failures pretty well, but Bob had to live with him and would be even more aware of them than we are.

 

[HerebeDragons]

Bob did try to actually parent Chris, but two things stood in his way: one was Barb (who, I think it's pretty clear considering how things turned out, was the dominant parent/partner), and his own lack of understanding of autism. I recall a prank call someone did where they actually managed to interview Bob; they asked about Chris, and it was clear he had no understanding whatsoever of what Chris should be capable of. It seems like Bob heard the word "autism" and immediately fell back on "severe mental problems that have no cure", with no real comprehension of treatment options or strategies to help Chris cope with the real world. It's really sad if you listen to it; he's extremely proud that Chris is able to complete video games, for fuck's sake, because he thought Chris' problems were so severe he'd never manage anything.

The other issue is that Bob seems to have understood various attempts to get Chris help (the incident at Nathaniel Green elementary school, for example) as intolerance. They said, "We want to send him to a special school where he'll get help." Bob heard, "We're going to ship him off to an asylum where nobody has to deal with him ever again." In the same interview, it's made clear that Bob believes the reason Chris has never been able to find a job is that people are intolerant of autism. I'm guessing it's a combination of being raised at a time where the answer to most mental problems was being institutionalized, and Barb and Chris' persecution complex.

 

[Very Honest Content]

funnily enough, bob was the better of the shitty parents.

And yet, was never awarded 'Father of the Year,' as far as we know!

Talk about your bias in voting by the judges.

 

[MrTroll]

I think Bob gets too much credit here. Sure, he was a better parent than the Sleeping Giant, but he still overstepped reasonable boundaries of conduct on Chris's behalf more than a few times (threatening Mimms, suing the Greene County school board over bullshit allegations of abuse, "negotiating" with Manchester High as depicted in Chris's Lego high school video, and so on).

If anything, he's more responsible than Barb for the way Chris turned out, because he was obviously a hell of a lot smarter, and had previous experience raising 2 successful children. He should have known better. It's not like he was incapable of being strict (i.e. his response to the house tour video; restricting Chris's credit cards), he just didn't bother most of the time.

 

[TrippinKahlua]

Bob was an old man who already had children, had held the responsibility of raising them into fine citizens. I'm sure when he decided to fuck Barb, he thought he was too old to be fertile and she was on menopause or something. Guess they were too pro-life to abort so they decided to keep the baby, but once they found out he was autistic, that was when Bob ignorantly decided to baby Chris, as you say.

I've been baby'd. And it was stupid and didn't help me.

I never got it with Bob, considering what a successful inventor he was. He was freaking rich at one point. Was he really content in allowing his son to ruin his own life?

 

[DrChristianTroy]

funnily enough, bob was the better of the shitty parents.

And yet, was never awarded 'Father of the Year,' as far as we know!

Talk about your bias in voting by the judges.

Chris... BIAS?!?!?! Say it isn't so!!!

 

[Sakamoto]

Barb sure did/does. I think Bob tried to make a man out of Chris for a while, but eventually realized it just wasn't going to happen and there was no point in pushing him anymore. Probably after he saw Chris couldn't even hold a job at Wendy's. After that, he mostly just tried to enjoy his "golden years" and let Chris do whatever unless it caused any trouble/embarrassment for him.

 

[BillRiley]

I think Bob gets too much credit here. Sure, he was a better parent than the Sleeping Giant, but he still overstepped reasonable boundaries of conduct on Chris's behalf more than a few times (threatening Mimms, suing the Greene County school board over bullshit allegations of abuse, "negotiating" with Manchester High as depicted in Chris's Lego high school video, and so on).

From what little evidence we have, Bob was a paranoid old fuck & full time drama queen. He appears to have enjoyed trying to bully people, including his own kids. He may have mellowed a bit with age. Then again, he may have just gotten too tired to fuck with Our Autistic Hero as much as he used to.

If anything, he's more responsible than Barb for the way Chris turned out, because he was obviously a hell of a lot smarter, and had previous experience raising 2 successful children. He should have known better. It's not like he was incapable of being strict (i.e. his response to the house tour video; restricting Chris's credit cards), he just didn't bother most of the time.

Two successful kids who wouldn't have anything to do with the hillbilly piece of shit after they escaped him. But, yeah, he was probably smarter than Barb, if you want to set the bar that low.