Do Online Friendships Carry any Value?

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M

MW 002

Guest
kiwifarms.net
For a while, I’ve been pondering on this question when I read a thread on Facebook where some guy said that the internet is his only form of socialization- to which then a bunch of other people jumped into the same thread to confess to to the same thing. It has left me really concerned, but fascinated at the same time. Then it made me recall all of the people I’ve run into over the years who pretty much let their lives be revolved around the Internet.

Thing is, with internet friendships it’s a lot easier to pretend to be someone you’re actually not in real life. For example, when online you can be as witty and sarcastic, with a side dish of charisma in contrast to being an insufferable sped in real life. And your friend could be doing the same to you; so really, you only get to know as much about them as they’d let you know and vice versa. And, if DeviantArt and LiveJournal are any kind of model to use in this context- online friendships tend to be a lot more fickle than ones that would normally be formed in the real world. It’s easier to get away with being flaky with friends online than in real life it would seem.

Not denying that you can find friends online- but they do take a lot more work to be satisfying than say non online friendships do.

I’m interested in hearing the thoughts of you socially, well adjusted kiwis.
 
I

IV 445

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kiwifarms.net
My feelings for you all are real
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E

ES 148

Guest
kiwifarms.net
They hold value in several ways. You can have completely valueless ones, of course, but the same can occur in real life.
Bearing in mind that someone who is a complete sped (for example, me) may well put value on their internet friendships despite their actual lack of value, that person having a group who they can access at almost any time and can offer advice, support and sympathy (or a kick in the backside for being a total sped) can help them in a lot of ways. Issue being that that's also the sort of person who gets assmad over 'cyberbullying'.
Once someone video-chats with you, you can be pretty sure they're a genuine friend, because then the anonymity barrier is lost.
Like most things, it's subjective. Value is very subjective, especially.

TL;DR Vrakks likes having a hugbox of 'friends' who pretend to care about her
 

Dolphin Lundgren

Picking blueberries with Henry Fonda.
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I've got a few online friends who I'm really close with and talk to all the time. We send each other holiday cards and have a connection. I'd consider them real friends. But it's honestly rare to find people online that can have that kind of connection with you.
 
R

RG 448

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kiwifarms.net
Yes but don’t get catfished. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve spent hours chatting it up with some nerdy fat slob only to find out it was actually a hot chick playing me the whole time. Always be cautious online.
 

Cummunism

I've erased 10 seconds of your time reading this!
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I'd say they're in the eye of the beholder. A while back, I had a friend whose other friends were mostly online and through steam. A lot of drama went on within this circle, stemming heavily from the fact that it's so easy to represent yourself differently over messages than in a call/video chat. Unfortunately, when I tried to intervene, my friend got upset with me for seemingly trying to disrupt her best friendships.

I absolutely believe that the internet can be a gateway to true, fulfilling friendships, but it's much harder for this to happen due to its inherently impersonal nature.
 

Kari Kamiya

"I beat her up, so I gave her a cuck-cup."
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I think online friends whom you consistently message with on a regular basis are like the modern-day pen pal, and people have managed to become good friends with their pen pals. But like with all relationships, it's something all recipients have to put in the effort to maintain that connection, or it'll fall apart in due time. Of course I've made friends online, but those who I've been talking to for at least a good number of time and have managed to form a connection with that does go beyond what we originally bonded over are those I'd consider actual friends. Yeah, the number of friends I've made that way I can count on one hand, but that's actually realistic, even tangible.

It's just that sadly, I think too many people (probably because they're speds) can't seem to realize that. It's been making me wonder if we're getting to that point where not even small children are able to socialize in person and need a computer to do it for them.
 

Dolphin Lundgren

Picking blueberries with Henry Fonda.
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The problem with online friendships is that if you don't talk constantly, then yes there's a big chance that you'll drift apart. I had a couple of friends who I used to chat with every day and write messages to, but they drifted away because they started doing their own thing so we lost contact. One was a person who I thought I'd stay friends with for a long time. Then again, I've had one online friend since 2012 and we still talk all the time in Groupme.
 

someweebname

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My online friends don't try to bum rides, borrow money from me constantly , want to borrow my video games or want to use my amazon prime free shipping and buy stupid shit that I'll have to look at like items for the next year. I can close the chat window and do something else. They're like digital pets you never have to feed. They're my favorite friends.
 

escapegoat

The answer is always "porn."
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I think it's really unhealthy to only have internet friends.

I have had internet friends turn into real friends, but most internet friendships are 80% projection. You fill in the gaps with your own stuff. All the things you don't actually know about them, you imagine. A lot of the time your imagined friend has nothing at all to do with the real asshole on the other end of the wire. You are, in essence, mostly just having a friendship with yourself. It's a very sneaky form of narcissism. I mean... look at tumblr, and tell me I'm wrong.
 

Somsnosa

Look at me! I'm the pope now
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I consider friends those who I voicechat with regularly. When you're talking you can't really correct or predict words like in text. It's healthy to have normal human relations every day, but you often have to rely on the internet to find those 2-3 people you share much in common with. I always save some bucks to meet hem, and I was never disappointed. You can either use the internet to fake your persona or reveal your true self
 

TwinkleSnort

Welcome to The Twilight Zone.
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I wonder if anyone here ever actually had a relationship over handwritten letters on paper.

This used to happen, you know.

I had one, starting age 12. We still talk, many years later.

Regarding internet friendships, IMHO, they can be good, but in order for them to become more of a "real" friend, you need to take it offline and spend time face-to-face.

I met someone online about 20 years ago - we took it to Real Life™, and are still close.