Do Online Friendships Carry any Value?

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M

MW 002

Guest
kiwifarms.net
I think it's really unhealthy to only have internet friends.

I have had internet friends turn into real friends, but most internet friendships are 80% projection. You fill in the gaps with your own stuff. All the things you don't actually know about them, you imagine. A lot of the time your imagined friend has nothing at all to do with the real asshole on the other end of the wire. You are, in essence, mostly just having a friendship with yourself. It's a very sneaky form of narcissism. I mean... look at tumblr, and tell me I'm wrong.
I agree with this as I’ve met far too many people who only do their socialization in the online world.

I can’t put my finger on it, but there is something about face to face interaction that just can’t be replicated in the online world; something which a lot more people are beginning to miss out on due to delayed social development that we’re starting to see nowadays.
 

escapegoat

The answer is always "porn."
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jun 16, 2017
Right. Also, in real life, people are a pain in the ass. You have to negotiate things. You have to put up with them being annoying, or being awkward, or eating sardines and cheese in front of you. Making the same fucking stupid mistakes in front of you over and over again. And vice versa. It's good for people to have to deal with that level of interpersonal friction. It keeps you from retreating too far up your own ass.

Online, you can just log off, or ignore, or unfriend, or hide, or block. It's a simulation of a friendship. Close, but not quite.
 

Bassomatic

HOW DO I KNOW YOU'RE NOT MAKAROV
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Mar 9, 2015
I have several online friends who are very important to me. I also have several irl friends who are fucking worthless.
The worth of their friendship is based on the worth of their character
This nailed it on the head.

When I was younger forums for hobbies etc (pre facebook) were huge, and I went to car meets people (myself as well) crossed states to meet up with screen names we dug. Had a great time, one mixed blessing was how people are different in person than online, not even meaning dishonest but how someone who's very shy online is really out going in person or vice versa.

Being in some niche groups, there was no one else who really cared about X in say 300 miles, so you become friends sharing a hobby etc. Maybe you meet maybe you don't. I've had nothing but the best meetings in person from online friends. I've opened my house and had doors opened for me from it. Back when I was really into modifying cars, I can't tell you the amount of help I gave and got from "online" friends. I was on my back covered in oil at 11pm on a work night swapping the motor out of someone's race car, and next week he was dialing my tune in.

I rather be friends in person, because good friends kick ass, but I rather have a good friend who I can only talk to online than a shit bag next door. We are lucky as now we can do so much more for a better personal interaction like skype, whatsapp, face time etc. It's a lot more personal than a IM/DM.

I do agree, you should have some IRL because no matter how close you are to people in spirit, you still need that guy down the block who helps you move and you are a better friend and person to be doing that for someone in person.
 

Orkeosaurus

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jul 18, 2016
in my experience real life friends can be much more ephemeral, especially after school, because people move on. It's just weird trying to keep in touch with RL friends online. With online friends you don't have to deal with the lifestyle dick measuring and there's less of a filter. Obviously everyone's different. I'm the kind of person where my best friends are online but I have more real life acquaintances.
 

Todesfurcht

Conversationalist
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Oct 14, 2016
Yes. Yes they do.
I've met some of the strongest, reliable, honest, and sincere people over the internet.
I've met some here, others I've met on platforms like Discord or Facebook.

My best friendships and relationships have been formed online. They helped me build confidence, they turned me into the person I wanted to be, the people online guided me and taught me how to be less sensitive, how to take punches. They taught me how to be more empathetic. They helped me care in places I otherwise wouldn't have.

I've been through drama with friends, with people I thought were friends, and people who should have never been friends.

These experiences better prepared me for real life friendships and relationships. I was able to take the leap into the real world. [And my god, it's amazing]

If not for the relationships I've had online [good or bad], I wouldn't have become the person I am today. I am 100% comfortable and happy with myself and my life.
 

Molo

Just to suffer
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Aug 31, 2017
If I can connect with another person then yeah I'd say it has value at least on an emotional level regardless of how one sided it could be
 

Funnybone

Needs her password stapled to her forehead
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Feb 4, 2015
I actually really care about the friends I've made from kiwi. especially one. he knows who he is.
 

Brit Crust

Most Fashionable Bitch In Tremorton
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Dec 11, 2016
I don't have much to contribute to this topic, but whether it comes to online friendship, I'm often reminded of a deviantART journal entry I'd read years and years ago. In that entry, the author cynically described online friendships to the effect of it being like having imaginary friends, i.e. empty and of no value.

I don't necessarily agree with that statement, but it's something that's always stuck with me.
 

Paul_Allen

Try getting reservations at Dorsia now, bastard!
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Feb 20, 2018
If you pay $5 to get cute emotes on Twitch and get to voice chat in some gamergril’s discord, you’re a fucking idiot. At least do something more honest and go to Hooters or a strip club where you’re not fooling yourself about what you want.
Fuck, pay for a hot yoga class so you can stare at up to 30 asses in spandex for an hour.
 

Agent Scud

Leadfoot
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Jan 18, 2018
They have as much value as you are willing to give them. Personally I think having offline interaction is more valuable, but I have about as much faith in my current online friends. People may act differently depending on how you interact with them but what matters is what your instincts tell you. That said being able to at least hear them and the way they talk helps a lot, but it's possible to pick up on how they type too.

I have a group of friends I met almost ten years ago and chat with on a daily basis. We trust one another to the point of sharing personal info and some of us have managed to meet in person. I still have some local friends, mainly a couple co-workers I can trust to help me out when I need it and vice-versa, but otherwise most of my high school friends have moved and/or cut ties with (I still keep in contact with one of them), and the only friend I can still contact (I think) from college is now a sexual deviant junkie.
 

LazarusOwenhart

Terrainist Shitlord!
kiwifarms.net
Joined
Nov 9, 2014
Depends on your definition of 'friend'. There are a few people on this site whose opinions I value on certain things and whose advice I will readily take. In as much as you can be friends with a handle, an avatar and a collection of opinions I consider them my friends. They enhance my life in a small way and therefore have a meaning to me. I think the difference here is that, if I was ever unable to visit this community I wouldn't spend hours agonizing over losing friends the way I would lament losing an IRL friend. I'd be happy to run into them in another community but that's about it.