DSP Tries It: The Movie - In a world of Gout, one man stood out.

WASR96

kiwifarms.net
(this quote is from 2000 pages ago, so calm down)
Yeah, seems like that is the case. Even so it seems that Khet has been a net-positive for DSP and forced him to stop sharing his personal life towards the internet quite as much as he's done in the past. Demonic possession or not, it seems that her influence may have acted to positively influence DSP's behavior. At least I hope that has been why he's actually stopped sharing the mundane details of his personal life--.

I genuinely hope she's acted as an autismal force, far beyond his most famous fans and detractors in making DSP a little bit of happier person. From everything known about her I hope this has been the case, however given what we know about DSP I'm still a little doubtful. I just hope that regardless of what the "detractor hivemind" might think that the fucker has experienced at least a little bit of personal happiness in his life and been taught to stop sharing dumb shit online every fucking day.

(I doubt this has at all happened, but I remain optimistic that outside of his specific ideas of "scheduling" that someone like Khet has actually pushed him towards better understanding how he might improve his life.)



I guess at least we might be optimistic in knowing the DSP Cinematic Universe is diverse enough at this point to include two separate women with the name Nicole. Its somewhat funny and comedic that people might legitimately assume GamerNicole & BadBunny are one in the same, but I guess it was inevitable.

Anita Sarkeesian is hopefully flicking her bean in knowing that a universe outside of Marvel and Capcom might be diverse enough to actually pass the Bechdel test, but it still remains that DSP acts as an absolute Chad and on top of bedding multiple women has refused any opportunity of an interview without firstly receiving a big stack of cash.

For whatever talk people might have of DSP's impending financial doom, its still relevant that he's never sold his life story to anyone just yet.
Even if he actually ever reached rock bottom, it is still possible Warner Bros or some other company might reach out to him and offer a significant amount of money in exchange for the rights to his life story.
Lets face facts, the DSP cinematic universe is far more interesting than any other property that has presently been monetized, and the DSP universe has always been far more interesting and diverse than practically any other property movie studios have currently attempted to monetize.

Although the DSP extended cinematic universe might initially appear as being lackluster, xmen and whatever other shit-hole properties have no hope of including legitimate decade-long catfishing empires, nor Norwegian butlers in Naruto cosplay outfits smoking marijuana as well as the many other diverse characters, such as furries and women who have completed artworks by lathering their nipples with paint upon canvases.

While preexisting cinematic universes might be restrictive because they were created based upon children's comics from many years ago, the DSP cinematic universe includes a far wider and more realistic presentation of humans than anyone could ever imagine.

The DSP cinematic universe exists as a true testament of how quality khantent on the internet presents itself despite the complaints of people who might complain abpit a lack of diversity. DSP proves to all of us, as well as Anita that Italian and Polish immigrants stomping Jews in a parody-like manner under the name of Howard Stern are considered to be actual legitimate "chiky-chang" forms of edgy humor.

I refuse to believe any other cinematic universe currently monetized by evil movie studios could ever include so many unique and diverse stories that surpass Kiwifarm's largest subforum, nor cause as much salivation that DSP's cinematic universe cause on a daily basis.
(lets not forget the story of actual diehard a-logs who have been relegated to prison for the next 5000 years for actually molesting their underage relatives)

In this way, DSP definitely has an unforeseen and often overlooked ownership of his cinematic universe. He's obviously playing 69-dimensional chess by refusing any form of interviews unless he's paid a ton of money. This is because DSP knows his cinematic universe is worth many millions of dollars.

(before you call me out for bullshit, keep in mind that several months ago Guillermo del Toro who is a legit director of many legitimate and well regarded Hollywood films legitimately followed drgnkilled/dsparchives for a short time until this was pointed out. Its obvious because of this that DSP's life story is actually worth an amount of money if he knew how to sell it. At least worth more than his current debt level.)

I can't wait until this becomes true so I can collect DSP extended cinematic universe action figurines. I will buy several Bronsgeest figures and make DSP perform fellatio upon them and use their plastic baseball bat attachments for the purpose of science.
Excellent! Brie Larson can play at Kat since they're both about as interesting as a brick wall. Hopefully it has a good budget to get some decent actors for the supporting characters John Rambo and Howard, and the antagonist Tevin.
 

harbinger

DarksydePhallus
kiwifarms.net
(before you call me out for bullshit, keep in mind that several months ago Guillermo del Toro who is a legit director of many legitimate and well regarded Hollywood films legitimately followed drgnkilled/dsparchives for a short time until this was pointed out. Its obvious because of this that DSP's life story is actually worth an amount of money if he knew how to sell it. At least worth more than his current debt level.)
A major Hollywood studio has just green-lit a motion picture based on the life of Phil Burnell. It is to be directed by Guillermo del Toro and you (yes, you, touching yourself under your keyboard) have been chosen to be the Casting Director. It is up to you to decide who shall play title character and supporting roles. So zip it up and get to casting.

Who will you choose to be in next summer’s major blockbuster? Cast the following rolls:
  • Phil “DarksydePhil” Burnell
  • Kat
  • Pandalee
  • Johnrambo
  • Howard
  • Tevin
  • Fred Fuchs
  • The Wolverine Toy
 

harbinger

DarksydePhallus
kiwifarms.net
I’m leaning towards Danny Devito as Phil, though I worry he may not be Italian enough for the role. For Pandalee, Constance Wu is the obvious choice. I think Johnrambo (he killed it in Project 7) and Howard should play themselves.

Edited for bugged spelling mechanics. I was pushing buttons!
 
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DoubleBored

I'm bored
kiwifarms.net
I’m leaning towards Danny Devito as Phil, though I worry he may not be Italian enough for the roll. For Pandalee, Constance Wu is the obvious choice. I think Johnrambo (he killed it in Project 7) and Howard should play themselves.
Phil let us know in a very clear way on her reveal that she isnt asian, stop with the Yellow Washing.

My casting would be:


DSP as DSP, no one can substitute nor represent this individual, and you are stupid if you think otherwise.
Kat - Sarah Jessica Parker (Easy joke, someone had to do it)
Fred Fuchs - Hideo Kojima (He know how to do very good ops, see MGS)
Tevin - Tyrone from Kekistan (Has experience with blind followers)
PandaLee - Potion with some kind of Synthvoice
John Rambo and Howard as Themselves, DSP would be very comfortable with both of them
The Wolverine Toy - a Bundle of Money (DSP cant act so he needs something real to desire)
 
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Nurse Ratchet

YAMANASHI
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
phil is obviously going to be played by melissa mcarthy
Holy shit I really wasn't ready for that.

The faceful of amazing grape popsicle I've been looking forward to all day is now splattered across the cilantro plants & I only missed the doggo by about 6in.

Well done.

(And no, I have still not learned never to eat/drink stuff while dicking around on this forum. It's always either spraylolz or sudden dry heaves. Just usually it's my coffee all over everything.)

:stress:
 

rotollo

in the court of the Mumkey king
kiwifarms.net
Fred should be played by Robert Dounty Jr., he knows what it's like to hit rock bottom and do coke so he would be a perfect fit
 
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Dick Pooman

Muchacho Sauce
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
I only feel comfortable casting the big 3 right now.

Phil "DSP" Burnell - Lou Diamond Phillips
Kat - Marisa Tomei
Panda Lee - Margaret Cho
 

Shambler

kiwifarms.net
I'd probably go:

DSP- John Travolta
Kat- Sarah Jessica parka or seabiscuit
Pandalee- Lucy Liu
Rambo- Nick Cage
Howard- Sean Astin
Tevin- Wesley Snipes
Fred Fuchs- Jesse Eisenberg doing his best mobster impression
Wolverine toy- Tom Cruise
i like the list but might i suggest DESTINY play the wolverine toy, tom cruise is like 5 foot and thats taller than needed
 
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