Dumb things you did as a kid. - From bodily harm to embarrassment or anything that stood out as exceptional

Fish-Eyed Fool

You just suck on that sucker, sucka.
kiwifarms.net
It was boiling hot summer day. I was 7, my friend was 6, and we were bored. We wanted to make a camouflage car, like the little models we played with.

So we took a big bunch of our neighbor's freshly mowed grass and put it all over his brand new and newly washed car. Had a great ole time until the guy came outside, understandably upset and yelling at us. He told our parents, we got the tanning of our lives, and I remember my dad paying for it to be cleaned again.
 

The Saltening

pass the fucking salt
kiwifarms.net
I got a boner in church... i was wearing gym shorts.... I didn't know what it was at the time..... fuck me
I also developed an addiction to pulling my hair out. I now have a bald spot.... years later....
 

edibleBulimia

wait so zimbabwe is an actual country?
kiwifarms.net
That’s easily the dumbest thing I ever did:
When I was in second grade, I was going to the bathroom once and I saw a girl who went in the bathroom, quickly took off her pants and panties and got in the cabin. Looking back now, it was really weird, but 7 year old me thought it was genius, but I wanted to be smarter than her...
One day later, I go up to the teacher, ask to go to the bathroom. She lets me go. I stood up, left the classroom, took off my pants and panties in the hallway and I went to the bathroom.

Why.
 

UntimelyDhelmise

Galar Purge Survivor
kiwifarms.net
When I was little I would run down this giant hill behind the house with one of those classic little red wagons, but one day I got the idea to ride in it while using the handle as a makeshift steering wheel. After doing it a couple times I found myself careening towards the woods and couldn't stop, so I leaped off the wagon and landed flat on my back, and for the first and only time in my life I had all the wind knocked out of me.

It was terrifying. I couldn't move, I couldn't breath, I just lied there desperately gasping for air like a fish out of water. When I finally managed to get a few breaths in it was a long and painful crawl back up the hill into the house. The whole time I tried to weakly call for my mother, but just my luck it turns out she was in the shower so by the time I finally managed to reach her I had basically recovered from the incident.
 

MeatRokket08

MORTIS
kiwifarms.net
When I was 7, and my brothers got the great idea to tie a laundry basket to the back of a sit-in lawn mower with rope and drive the mower all across my very hill-ish yard. Needless to say we went flying more times than I can remember.

Still want to do it again.
 

The Last Stand

Kiwi Farms Popularity Judge
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Just remembered.

Little fuzzy, but when I was around 4 or 5, I let open the back door and used my toys to shovel snow in the house to the kitchen. That same day, I turned on the stove to high for two of the burners. I even tried to burn a toy I had too.

Another time, I was fooling around on my parent's work computer and deleted her work files. Even worse, I found porn on that computer and I think I left it open for work to see or sent it to the boss.
 

The Last Stand

Kiwi Farms Popularity Judge
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
i got so many i could post in this thread forever. i pour a glass of water all over the family TV just to see what would happen. mom slapped the shit out of me.
I remember one time, I put a cup of juice on top of one of those tube TVs. It just spilled out of nowhere on the back. The TV was off, but I just hightailed it out of there.
 

Niggernerd

Hol up *siiiiiiiiip* nigga
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
When I was 4, we were getting ready for church. I was still naked and walking around the house, the slide door was open so I took off. Parents went to go look for me and found me on our old black neighbors porch drinking koolaid
 

MalWart

kiwifarms.net
In preschool, I had of calling this chubby Asian kid a "banister boy". I'm still surprised none of the staff found out about it.

I also referred to transmission lines as "negs" when I was 5. I remember proclaiming that these things were "angry negs" because of the antenna things on top:
858230

Needless to say, I'm glad my parents called me out on it before I'd end up getting myself in trouble somewhere down the road.
 

Ubiquitous

kiwifarms.net
When I was small I used to go around picking up discarded sweet wrappers and putting them in my mouth. I also ate laurel leaves, grass, toothpaste and licked an AA battery (mmm, tangy). I also remember putting pennies in my mouth and almost choking on a 20 pence piece. My grandparents were sitting on the sofa behind me when I did that. I don't think they noticed.
 
P

PL 001

Guest
kiwifarms.net
I had no filter and would comment on people in public, whether or not they could hear me.

We laugh about it now, but my dad likes reminding me of the time we were getting groceries, and I was probably 7 or so. There was this huge obese dude in front of us at the register, and I had (rather loudly) said "He looks fat, huh dad? He needs to exercise!"

Apparently hurt the guy's feelings, and embarrassed the fuck out of my dad.
 

betterbullocks

deep anal and cool ranch doritos, shes got it all
kiwifarms.net
Something compelled my sister and I to make fabrege eggs, so we went out and got parafin wax to preserve the eggs we had. We (more or less) successfully preserved the empty eggshells, but we had a shit ton of melted wax left over.

So we poured it directly down the sink.

There was SO MUCH wax, like most of the box, it was practically irreparable. My mom made my sister and I dig out every last bit of wax, along with last night's food, the egg from earlier, God knows what else. It was absolutely disgusting and my fingernails were soft and broke off from the constant, waxy, wet clawing. Took about 6 hours, and I 100% deserve it.
 
Tags
None