Dumbest things you got in trouble for at school -

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Trump's Everchosen
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Got kicked out of class for falling asleep during some sappy-ass 9/11 documentary that our history teacher put on because he didn't feel like actually doing his job that day and figured he'd just let the TV lecture us instead. Fine with me, I'll just go sleep in detention.
 

JektheDumbass

kiwifarms.net
yeah, can't have our precious teachers be exposed to the same things that every other employee in the god damn country is exposed to! nope, gotta coddle them with special privileges as much as possible!
You get fired every year and have to re-apply for your job? Because non-tenured teachers have to.
 
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polonium

By your genders combined, I am Captain Tumblr
True & Honest Fan
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You get fired every year and have to re-apply for your job? Because non-tenured teachers have to.
Tons of jobs are project or contract based with no guarantee of ongoing employment. If you're good at what you do you get more work. The same should apply to teaching, in fact it's even more important because if I fuck up my job, a cell tower gets put in the wrong place or something but if a teacher fucks up you get dumb kids posting stories in kiwi farms for the rest of their lives.
 

Idiotron

The last sane person on Earth
kiwifarms.net
I like to know things so I research stuff every single day.
After many many years, I've accumulated a fuckton of information in my head.
That can be a problem at school when you keep correcting the teachers, I got in a lot of trouble for doing that repeatedly.

Questioning the logic of teachers can easily get you in trouble.
For example, this happened after I sneezed in my hand:

Teacher: "Don't sneeze in your hand."
Me: "why?"
Teacher: "You'll spread germs when you shake someone's hand."
Me: "You don't shake hands with your left hand."
Teacher: (5 second loading time)... APOLOGIZE!
Me: "For what?"
Teacher: "Don't argue with me, apologize."

I was labeled a "hooligan" after that by the faculty.
A fucking hooligan... and that was way before this whole "words are violence" nonsense.
 

Demonslayer1776

George Floyd's Dealer
kiwifarms.net
When I was a freshman in highschool I had this spanish class and there was this guy who gave half of his presentation in English. Stuff like "Mi uncle es Joe". Couldn't help but laugh, so I started drinking a waterbottle to try and hold it in, but one small snicker got out and the teacher tried to suspend me for it. He did already hate my guts so I wasn't that surprised. He later made my friend and I sing a love song in spanish for a project and gave me a D on it even though I learned the whole song and it was by far the hardest one in the class. I swapped to taking Japanese classes the next year.
 

Molester Stallone

Trust me, I'm a doctor.
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A few kids from my class were goofing around at lunch and tossing food back and fourth. One of the teachers saw this and made the statement that the entire lunch table was getting written up, and staying after lunch to clean the cafeteria. I refused to be punished for something I didn't do and just walked out. Spent 3 days in ISS for sticking up for myself.
 

Dr. Henry Armitage

Head librarian at Miskatonic University
True & Honest Fan
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We were in gym when the fire alarm starts blaring. We go outside and a few minutes later the principal comes out to tell us some one pulled the alarm and he wants to know who. well this one little fucker in my class points at me and says "He did it I saw him!". Now you'd think the fact that I was in the middle of the gym playing dodge ball with my whole class sans one as witnesses would be a pretty good alibi. But nope, not for principal dick head. I was immediately taken to his office and questioned. My parents were called and he threatened to expel me if I "didn't tell the truth". of course I was terrified but thankfully I kept denying it. a couple hours later it came out that the alarm that had been pulled had been outside the gym and had been pulled by a sixth grade boy. They hadn't even looked at the security cameras until then. I wasn't even given so much as an apology and my parents still grounded me for a week because they had to leave work.
One day my mom came to pick me up from wrestling practice and when I saw her i knew she was PISSED. She immediately starts screaming at me. She eventually calmed down and told me that my math teacher called her and told her I was failing all my classes. Which I knew wasn't true. She had told her I hadn't turned in any work all year and I was gonna have to repeat the 8th grade. I begged her to go back to the school and ask my teachers. Which she agreed to i'm guessing in the hope of making her madder at me. Cause she never believed me about anything. Thankfully my English teacher was there and she showed my mom that I was passing her class with an A and had all my work in. The car ride back home was silent. She had apparently cleaned out my room and pawned all my stuff except the bare necessities as punishment. Next day she has a meeting with the principal and all my teacher and they show her i was not failing and was in no danger of repeating the grade. Her excuse for calling my mom was she overheard the other teachers talking about a student, and thought they were talking about me. So naturally she should inform the parents. Thankfully she got in trouble for this. Shes hated me ever since. she spent the rest of the year yelling at me for the most minor infractions. The worst time was when she yelled at me for reading a book during her class. The only book I had open was my math book. So naturally I was confused. She meant the book I had in my backpack. my zipped up backpack that was stored under my desk. Apparently she thought I was some kind of remote viewer.
 
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Argh My Cigar

Good morning starshine, the earth says "hello!"
True & Honest Fan
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That Family Guy episode where Peter gets a job at the brewery, gets drunk, and goes “WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?”. I was quoting it to a friend in High School, teacher overheard, and I got sent home. Dumbest bullshit ever. Also I don’t watch Family Guy anymore. Fuck you Seth.
 

JektheDumbass

kiwifarms.net
We were in gym when the fire alarm starts blaring. We go outside and a few minutes later the principal comes out to tell us some one pulled the alarm and he wants to know who. well this one little fucker in my class points at me and says "He did it I saw him!". Now you'd think the fact that I was in the middle of the gym playing dodge ball with my whole class sans one as witnesses would be a pretty good alibi. But nope, not for principal dick head. I was immediately taken to his office and questioned. My parents were called and he threatened to expel me if I "didn't tell the truth". of course I was terrified but thankfully I kept denying it. a couple hours later it came out that the alarm that had been pulled had been outside the gym and had been pulled by a sixth grade boy. They hadn't even looked at the security cameras until then. I wasn't even given so much as an apology and my parents still grounded me for a week because they had to leave work.
One day my mom came to pick me up from wrestling practice and when I saw her i knew she was PISSED. She immediately starts screaming at me. She eventually calmed down and told me that my math teacher called her and told her I was failing all my classes. Which I knew wasn't true. She had told her I hadn't turned in any work all year and I was gonna have to repeat the 8th grade. I begged her to go back to the school and ask my teachers. Which she agreed to i'm guessing in the hope of making her madder at me. Cause she never believed me about anything. Thankfully my English teacher was there and she showed my mom that I was passing her class with an A and had all my work in. The car ride back home was silent. She had apparently cleaned out my room and pawned all my stuff except the bare necessities as punishment. Next day she has a meeting with the principal and all my teacher and they show her i was not failing and was in no danger of repeating the grade. Her excuse for calling my mom was she overheard the other teachers talking about a student, and thought they were talking about me. So naturally she should inform the parents. Thankfully she got in trouble for this. Shes hated me ever since. she spent the rest of the year yelling at me for the most minor infractions. The worst time was when she yelled at me for reading a book during her class. The only book I had open was my math book. So naturally I was confused. She meant the book I had in my backpack. my zipped up backpack that was stored under my desk. Apparently she thought I was some kind of remote viewer.
Your parents sound like colossal faggots.
 

FuckedUp

Professional Glowposter
True & Honest Fan
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my parents still grounded me for a week because they had to leave work
Holy shit, were your parents abusive or something? I legitimately cannot think of any parents who don't outright beat their kids using fucking "take the anger out on their kid for something their school is blatantly at fault for" mentality. Normal parents, even the strictest ones, would comfort the kid.

EDIT: didn't read the second story
She had apparently cleaned out my room and pawned all my stuff except the bare necessities as punishment.
Holy shit, they really hated you. How did they do it that quickly without any hesitation? It took the kids in freaking Malcolm in the Middle to steal a shitload of money from a church to get that punishment. Did they ever compensate for that?
 

Thai Kick

kiwifarms.net
Back in 6th grade I got set up by one of my friends who snuck into math class during lunch and scribbled the shittiest drawing of a cop chase scene all over the desk I sat at. I took pride in the art i did but even then the math teacher didn't buy into the idea that I wouldnt draw something that shitty just to get in trouble for it. So he had me stay after school to sanitize the desks/chairs.

It wasnt a huge deal and it was funny as hell once I found out he did it, but I did get back at him eventually by loosening the screws on one of his classroom chairs so it would collapse once he sat down
 

Dr. Henry Armitage

Head librarian at Miskatonic University
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Holy shit, were your parents abusive or something? I legitimately cannot think of any parents who don't outright beat their kids using fucking "take the anger out on their kid for something their school is blatantly at fault for" mentality. Normal parents, even the strictest ones, would comfort the kid.

EDIT: didn't read the second story

Holy shit, they really hated you. How did they do it that quickly without any hesitation? It took the kids in freaking Malcolm in the Middle to steal a shitload of money from a church to get that punishment. Did they ever compensate for that?
Original stuff no, but at Christmas that year I got replacements of some stuff like my game cube and some of my books. It wasn't really both my parents just my mom. Shes a rabid man hating feminist in all but the name, and believes every single stereotype about teenage boys. So being a teenage boy at the time I was clearly just as bad as my teacher said if not worse. So obviously I deserved it if not more. She spent years believing I was leading some sort of drug and alcohol fueled orgy filled secret life that would have made Caligula blush. Why? I honestly don't know. Technically I do lead a secret life but just involves laughing at people on the internet.
comfort the kid.
lol not in my house.
 

Sug Benis

It's hip to fuck clones
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The teacher for my driver's ed class was an... Interesting sort. Shirt unbuttoned down to his sternum, with chest hair like a gray Chewbacca, too-tight pants for a late middle aged potato of a human being, and with an irritating tendency to toss out the drivers ed manual in favor of reading from the bible. In fucking Driver's Ed. There was a bit of a pranking competition in effect.

Got ratted out by the class autist for gluing his mouse to his mousepad and writing "hail satin" (spelling intentional) on the whiteboard.

Didn't even win the competition, but we ended up feeding the autist a full bar of ex-lax in revenge, he shit himself so hard on the bus it got on the window and the kid next to him, and then we felt really bad after realizing we could have actually potentially hurt the guy with that much laxative.
 

Autumnal Equinox

Dinsdale!
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I was reading a copy of The Exorcist in middle school and got it taken away by a teacher known for being a bit of a fundie. Asked me why I was reading "evil books" and bringing them to school.

I wasn't reading it during classtime, and I didn't attend a religious-focused school that may have taken issue with the book's content. Teacher wouldn't give me the book back at the end of the day. Told my dad about it when I got home and he unleashed hell on him. One of the rare times I saw my dad truly furious. Got the book back, but that teacher always found little ways to try and goad me the rest of the time I was attending that school.
 
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