Elisa Ann Schwartz / Elisa Jordana / Kermit and Friends Podcast - Gunt-enabling host of the unpopular "Kermit and Friends" podcast; former keytarist for Cobra Starship; fame-seeking ex-girlfriend of Howard Stern Show writer Benjy Bronk

Insanely Retarded

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Elisa was the one that made Benjy wear a wig, eyeliner, new wardrobe, he couldn't take off his hat, etc. no?
She also refused to sleep with him and would very rarely kiss him if memory serves right. It's why he was constantly made fun of and she was seen as using him for exposure.

I also think this is probably because of Dax, that he is either trying to, or has already slept with her and used Ralph as a replacement when she wanted him to guest on her podcast.
Someone obviously sold her on the idea that Ralph was a big deal and the LA connection + her trying to sleep her way into becoming famous makes sense.

If not though, then there is a chance that a few days after his appearance on her show, Elisa got texts telling her "you know who this is" and asking her to "call me and cum for me during my show". Which would explain her apparent disgust with Ralph and overall regret.

Fucking online sweetheart is probably getting unsolicited dirty texts from Ethan motherfucking Ralph. Will the wonders ever cease?
 

Ratzinger

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Insanely Retarded

Corn enthusiast
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So the show is mostly just a bunch of people calling in to try to make fun of her?
I've skipped through both of these episodes and although Andy Dick is in the thumbnail I haven't actually seen him on the show, and if he is, he must have been on for less than a minute because scrolling through the entire stream I can't find his appearance, but apparently Eliza is getting married to him? WTF is even going on? This woman is as insane as ever.

Edit: just figured out the thumbnail is from a different call than the actual show since she is wearing different clothes. Holy shit is that sad, using Andy dick as clickbait is pretty sad.
 

#KillAllPedos

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So the show is mostly just a bunch of people calling in to try to make fun of her?
I've skipped through both of these episodes and although Andy Dick is in the thumbnail I haven't actually seen him on the show, and if he is, he must have been on for less than a minute because scrolling through the entire stream I can't find his appearance, but apparently Eliza is getting married to him? WTF is even going on? This woman is as insane as ever.

Edit: just figured out the thumbnail is from a different call than the actual show since she is wearing different clothes. Holy shit is that sad, using Andy dick as clickbait is pretty sad.
Andy Dick has perpetrated a surprising amount of sexual assaults. Maybe I shouldn’t be surprised tbh. I’d wager this guy has diddled at least a few kids in his day.
 

theguntsexpartner

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Prolapsedbutt

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I was so fascinated I ended up watching a whole stream with onion. I thought I’d skim through, but these people are fucking INSANE. The girl is almost definitely in an abusive love triangle and one dude who looks like he’s soaking wet proposed to her while she was mid interview Onision. The woman and Greg just sit in silence as her “ex” rambles on in some sort of ancient tongue. The whole podcast/whatever had me laughing the entire time. If you’re not entertained by the drunk coked out asshole on a roof, complaining about being cold, then her billionaire ex is sure to entertain. Also there’s a bit where she basically forced Onion and Fridge to be friends again. The whole thing is barely about Onision, But the last 8 minutes are the best!!! Totally worth it. I think this woman does not know how to surround herself with anything other than predators and abusers. That bit is kinda sad :(
 
I was so fascinated I ended up watching a whole stream with onion. I thought I’d skim through, but these people are fucking INSANE. The girl is almost definitely in an abusive love triangle and one dude who looks like he’s soaking wet proposed to her while she was mid interview Onision. The woman and Greg just sit in silence as her “ex” rambles on in some sort of ancient tongue. The whole podcast/whatever had me laughing the entire time. If you’re not entertained by the drunk coked out asshole on a roof, complaining about being cold, then her billionaire ex is sure to entertain. Also there’s a bit where she basically forced Onion and Fridge to be friends again. The whole thing is barely about Onision, But the last 8 minutes are the best!!! Totally worth it. I think this woman does not know how to surround herself with anything other than predators and abusers. That bit is kinda sad :(
That video is such a beautiful shitshow. I wish that Ralph's show was half as entertaining, even if it was completely unintentional.

I would disagree that she is some innocent party in this entire thing. She let her crazy ex ramble on about how the vultures on the roof (I suspect he's talking about Andy Dick, because he's on the roof drunk/high/on mushrooms) were telling her not to marry him and then ended her show with his completely unhinged 5 minute, uninterrupted monologue. He did bring up her "getting raped every week", so I can't blame her too much for letting him hang out to dry.

I'll post some more highlights, but for now enjoy her introducing the show while a dog licks her mouth.


Part one of the proposal.

Part two

I could upload the entire thing at this rate, just go watch it.

Andy asking permission to come downstairs and lay down.
 
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TriggerMeElmo

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That video is such a beautiful shitshow. I wish that Ralph's show was half as entertaining, even if it was completely unintentional.

I would disagree that she is some innocent party in this entire thing. She let her crazy ex ramble on about how the vultures on the roof (I suspect he's talking about Andy Dick, because he's on the roof drunk/high/on mushrooms) were telling her not to marry him and then ended her show with his completely unhinged 5 minute, uninterrupted monologue. He did bring up her "getting raped every week", so I can't blame her too much for letting him hang out to dry.

I'll post some more highlights, but for now enjoy her introducing the show while a dog licks her mouth.
View attachment 2042118
W G F D
 

Catferatu

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Did anyone watch the Easter Stream? I'm so fascinated by this creepy woman and her show. I'm only halfway through but around 27:00 they show a video of that Eric dude that proposed to her a few weeks ago jerking off and act like it's a normal thing to do. They censored it with Andy Dick's face but like, does nobody think that's actually disturbing to show literal porn on youtube? It doesn't look like he's acting. There are no comments about it in the comment section. She also said she received plenty of nude content from him.
I can't wrap my head around what the show is even about. At first I thought it was like a normal podcast with call-in guests and I assumed they did lots of trolling, especially during the Onision stream, but I don't think so anymore. I think the host is actually batshit insane and her guests are too. Nothing makes sense and she associates with known predators all the time. She even said in this stream that she got backlash for having Onision on the show but that she thinks we all did sin at some point in live and that Jesus wouldn't judge what sins are worse than others. Like wtf? She apparently doesn't see anything wrong with abusing young women or all the other things he did.
Then Andy Dick being completely on drugs all the time, that's not trolling either.

I also hope we can get more info if that pedophile zoophile is actually her father and if the rumors are true. So far nothing shows up on google except what was already posted here.
 

Ralphamale

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I also hope we can get more info if that pedophile zoophile is actually her father and if the rumors are true. So far nothing shows up on google except what was already posted here.
Elisa's own mot her has talked about her Father being that pedo so it's pretty much confirmed. No way she isn't on some type of drugs herself, normal people don't act this way or believe all sins are equal. Andy could kill her dog and feed it to her and she would have to be okay with it by that logic. Her trying to be the band whore resulting in her getting kicked out after the other members came to the realization that she was pitting them all against each other to fight over her still eats at her mind every single day thinking what could of been.
 

#KillAllPedos

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I also hope we can get more info if that pedophile zoophile is actually her father and if the rumors are true. So far nothing shows up on google except what was already posted here.
I tend to believe the rumors based off things people have said, the things he's said about himself, and the way he acts (both on and off-camera). There are screencaps of him soliciting nudes from minors, and he admitted to being attracted to children (says that kids age 10-13 look "sexy," that "they want sex," and "the law sucks.").
See 17:12
He also admitted to banging a 14-year-old when he was 18 (which is ironic, given that he was in the middle of explaining why he's not a pedophile).
See 25:48
There was an incident where he walked up to someone's yard sale and allegedly started filming little kids while they were bending over (here is audio and partial video of that incident—you can hear people explaining the situation to the cop).
See 10:18
But I'm sure that's only the tip of the iceberg. He is clearly sexually attracted to children, and he's admitted at least one act of pedophilia. When people confront him on this stuff, he always comes back to "I was taken out of context."

As for the zoophilia stuff, people keep referring to a certain video or videos where he does something intimate with one of his dogs. I haven't seen it, but it's probably still out there somewhere.
 
I love this show. I sit in shocked disbelief at what I'm seeing on my screen for 2 hours and there is nothing quite like it. It does feel like some kind of satire at times, but I am on the side of believing this is just what happens when you give crazy people a youtube show.

Here is one of the videos of Eric jerking it to a song, as Elisa sways along to the music and Andy rages as his mic doesn't work. Eric then goes on to threaten to murder Andy if he complains any more. There are two more in the video titled " Kermit and Friends - Child of God"

It cut her off at the start saying "Speaking of black lives matter, I have a video of Eric"

Eric either has a book, or someone has written a book under his name - Eric John Riggs: "Kermit and Friends ~ Do's And Don't ~ A Guild To Marrying Elisa A Schwartz"
Have you ever wanted to know the secret to a woman's heart? Like if you could just walk up to a girl at a bar and whisper something in her ear and she would be yours forever? You'd half to be very careful with that kind of super power!Are you the biggest fan of Kermit and Friends ever? Then you are in for a treat!So many men have wanted to become Elisa's boyfriend so they that they could work together one day in gold and silver until Eric came around and proposed to her. He told her, "I am going to be the biggest rock star ever. Do you want to be my girl? We can be on stage together! "She loves it when I call her on Kermit and Friends because she and I are actually best friends forever. Go figure! All of the proceeds go towards expanding the Mayhew Program, the worlds first summer camp for kids that needs us! It's already one of the top youth development programs in existence to start up! Just like you girl! You make a great start up! Thank you so very much!

Sorry about the image for ants, but I don't know how to take full-sized images off of amazon. There are a few pages there. Only 3 more copies left in stock!
81Pn0GR36EL.jpg


Did anyone watch the Easter Stream? I'm so fascinated by this creepy woman and her show. I'm only halfway through but around 27:00 they show a video of that Eric dude that proposed to her a few weeks ago jerking off and act like it's a normal thing to do. They censored it with Andy Dick's face but like, does nobody think that's actually disturbing to show literal porn on youtube? It doesn't look like he's acting. There are no comments about it in the comment section. She also said she received plenty of nude content from him.
I can't wrap my head around what the show is even about. At first I thought it was like a normal podcast with call-in guests and I assumed they did lots of trolling, especially during the Onision stream, but I don't think so anymore. I think the host is actually batshit insane and her guests are too. Nothing makes sense and she associates with known predators all the time. She even said in this stream that she got backlash for having Onision on the show but that she thinks we all did sin at some point in live and that Jesus wouldn't judge what sins are worse than others. Like wtf? She apparently doesn't see anything wrong with abusing young women or all the other things he did.
Then Andy Dick being completely on drugs all the time, that's not trolling either.

I also hope we can get more info if that pedophile zoophile is actually her father and if the rumors are true. So far nothing shows up on google except what was already posted here.
She apparently started the show in place of her Sunday church service because she had some sort of falling out with them, and this was supposed to be a religious show. It's now devolved into great content however.
 
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