Exhibitionism -

[Christ-Chan]

I run a public blog and, as some member here have become painfully aware of, when it comes to opening myself up I'll use every last scarp I find within me to paint that canvas - to create whatever image I feel I must get out of me and somehow out there; that unidentifiable place that lies hidden beneath layers and layers of personifications we may never quite figure out. We just want to bleed, by whatever medium we express ourselves, in the hope that a drop or two will splatter against that surface we've reached for, whatever, and wherever, it might be.

I think that's the common thread among exhibitionists, or at least I'm misled enough to believe it is, but the form the condition will take varies greatly: there are artists who never give interviews (for they want their art to be seen as individual creations, bereft the taint, or glory, of their creator), there are those that put something, anything, out there for the world to see as soon as they can (for they want someone else to want to see them, no matter the professional or artistic sacrifice it might take, they want to be someone adored by the people out there), are are those who are into amateur porn, or those who blog obsessively about every tiny part of their day that they feel they can pull some attention, any attention to.

How common has this kind of behavior become in this day and age? Do you partake in it? What side of yourself do you leave the most candid? How does another persons exhibitionism reflect on him her in your eyes? What does it say about someone who has put up erotic pictures or videos for the public to see online? Or the blogger who'll share any private moment he or she can?

What is your relationship with the word?

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Brother, don't take this the wrong way, but the Hulkster was anticipating a totally different topic when clicking on this thread

 

[Foulmouth]

Brother, don't take this the wrong way, but the Hulkster was anticipating a totally different topic when clicking on this thread

Lol. Same. I was about to sperg out bout my ex-wife.

 

[Surtur]

If Chit was still here, this would be the shirtless Chit thread.

 

[Christ-Chan]

Fine, now there's an exhibitionist attention whore in the thread:

 

[Surtur]

Fine, now there's an exhibitionist attention whore in the thread:

Nothing wrong with showing off your body.

 

[Foulmouth]

Nothing wrong with showing off your body AS LONG AS YOU'RE NOT CHRIS !

 

[Christ-Chan]

Well, thank you (I think?), but there are other forms of exhibitionism besides pictures. How do you feel about people who broadcast their lives and live it like an open wound? What does blogging incessantly say about someone? Is it courageous? Is it a cry for attention? Where's the line between art inspired by your life and just pure Marry Sueing?

 

[Watcher]

I dunno if my life would be interesting enough to document personally. A big problem I had whenever I tried to start a blog was "What if nobody cares about what I'm writing?" It's probably a lack of confidence but I in general attribute it to not reading any blogs in my spare time.

In general everyone needs a hobby though. Mine is writing stories I don't share.

 

[Zim]

Well, thank you (I think?), but there are other forms of exhibitionism besides pictures. How do you feel about people who broadcast their lives and live it like an open wound? What does blogging incessantly say about someone? Is it courageous? Is it a cry for attention? Where's the line between art inspired by your life and just pure Marry Sueing?

I think it just depends on the purpose of the blog because bloggers come in many shapes. Some blog strictly as a way to let their emotions out. Not so much because they want people to read it but more as a form of self therepy like a diary. Other's blog as a way to garner support from friends, relatives, and strangers. They may do it for a miriad of reasons such as lonelyness or to help them get through life in general. Others do it strictly to entertain and/or make money.

Personally, I like blogs that let me get to know the person writing it. Tell me a story of your life and let me compare it to my own. Let me see the way you see things to gain a new perspective. The bloggers that give me a reason to connect with them are the ones I like the most.

Anyone who opens themselves up in a public manner such as through personal writing are sort of brave I guess. It really depends on how personal the blog is and anyone who blogs publicly wants attention in some form. It also shows they are more open.

So I guess I should ask what your goals are with your blog?

By the way, I'm sort of interested to check it out now even though we don't know each other that well.

 

[Christ-Chan]

So I guess I should ask what your goals are with your blog?

By the way, I'm sort of interested to check it out now even though we don't know each other that well.

Well, the thread isn't about me specifically, I was trying to generate a discussion regarding the corealation between the self and our outwards persona - what we feel we want to share, and, perhaps more importantly, what we want to see in others.

But, since you asked, here's my latest blog post I guess (the formatting is from the site it was originally published on, so there will be some barren code in there):

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"What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know
Goes away
In the end"​

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It’s an odd feeling, talking to you these days – almost alien – but it’s not because of everything we’ve gone through lately. No, the reason it feels so distant to me is that I can only remember the way things ended, and I think you feel the same way, but the difference is you somehow moved on and I am still right here.

We can’t really talk anymore. I mean, sentences are uttered and finished and anecdotes and platitudes are shared, but we’re not actually saying anything to each other. You don’t lean your head against my shoulder because it makes you feel safe, you do it to try and distract myself from how cold I’ve become, and I don’t smell your hair because of the endorphins your scent release within me buy because I’m trying to determine whether it’s your shampoo or my new perfume that stings my nose.

I think the sensation you experience as you look back on me is bleaker than what I see when I stare ahead at you. The mist between us is just the same but the reflections of the light is a question of perspective. I’m not happy for you. I don’t regret meeting you, and I wouldn’t change anything save perhaps for the way things ended, but I’m not happy for you. The truth is, I don’t think you feel bad for me either. Once all the feelings have gone, isn’t it, perhaps, time to let the light do the same? I think it’s time for the fog to draw us a line – to remove the fading silhouette and ease the dying of the light.

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"You are someone else
I am still right here"
​

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Jag kommer inte bita dig för att du kommenterar.​

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It was written in Swedish originally (you might tell from the sloppy translation work I did), so the song lyrics formed a much better padding than they do in English. ^^'​

 

[Surtur]

Ive always liked that song.

 

[Zim]

Well, the thread isn't about me specifically, I was trying to generate a discussion regarding the corealation between the self and our outwards persona - what we feel we want to share, and, perhaps more importantly, what we want to see in others.

I know. After writing all those things about blogs, I just wanted to see what kind of things you write about.

To me, personal blogs are exactly what you just said. It's a way to let someone "in" but safely. They let people show the side of them that they want and be as personal or impersonal as they choose. It also generally attracts like minded people.

As far as exposing yourself, I think most people have a side of themselves they broadcast to others and a side they keep more private. It's like the difference between what you say out loud and what you think about when you're alone. Again, personal blogs help you pull out some of the more private things, edit it for content a little, and comfortably put it out there.

Hopefully, this all makes sense. I only am in the deep thoughts part of the board after being up all night at work.

I also want to listen to NIN now.

 

[Christ-Chan]

I know. After writing all those things about blogs, I just wanted to see what kind of things you write about.

Sorry, I didn't mean to sound condescending, I was just a little embarrassed. I apologize if you took offense to my remark.

Anyway, I don't have a lot of readers, but there is one trend I've taken notice off. I post a lot of stuff like what I quoted above, and the occasional short story, poem or song, but I've only really had two forms of feedback: one is, of course, people who'll call you an attention whore and tell you how pathetic you are, but the second group is, conversely, readers complimenting your prose.

I think anyone would be glad to hear that, and even more so if you're of the creative persuasion, but I find it odd how the reaction is of the intellectual breed rather than the emotional; I think it's got something to do with what you mentioned about people reading blogs for entertainment, and so in the eyes of the reader what the writer is trying to express is observed as less autobiographical and more creative in nature - you become a character in a weird way. It's almost like confessing your love for someone, sharing your innermost emotions and giving it your all only for the lady or gentlemen to stand up and give you a round of applause and telling you that it was "very convincing".

I'm probably just pretentious and/or self-indulgent, but it's interesting to me how when you put something down in a creative form it almost naturally takes on a guise of fiction, and is sometimes experienced as such.

 

[Zim]

I think anyone would be glad to hear that, and even more so if you're of the creative persuasion, but I find it odd how the reaction is of the intellectual breed rather than the emotional; I think it's got something to do with what you mentioned about people reading blogs for entertainment, and so in the eyes of the reader what the writer is trying to express is observed as less autobiographical and more creative in nature - you become a character in a weird way. It's almost like confessing your love for someone, sharing your innermost emotions and giving it your all only for the lady or gentlemen to stand up and give you a round of applause and telling you that it was "very convincing".

I'm probably just pretentious and/or self-indulgent, but it's interesting to me how when you put something down in a creative form it almost naturally takes on a guise of fiction, and is sometimes experienced as such.

Being more intellectual on the internet is sort of the nature of the beast. People like to sound smart (sort of going back to people's public side) and online it's pretty easy to do. With blogs, even ones that are mostly real life events, you're totally right that people just look at the author as a character. I think it's what happens when you are reading about things where you don't know the person writing it personally. It just comes off as a story since the reader wasn't there sort of like when you read about a tragedy on the other side of the world and you think "oh man! That's terrible!" but can't get emotionally into it because you just can't relate.

Really I think the post you shared is sort of like art. It's very emotional and sounds personal. I like it.

Oh yeah, don't worry. I wasn't offended at all. I was actually just trying to not sound like a jerk. lol