Fucking beautiful. Plus one from me, this pretty well covers my point of view without my stupidity getting in the way of the message.I'll start by saying 1) @Cosmos I know you fully understand everything I'm about to say, I'm not ranting at you and 2) I'm about to condense the general theme of all of A&H into one spergy rant, but @Ineedahero kind of inspired me by making a pretty good point, so everyone please forgive me my screed.
It's not about thinking my life is in physical danger.
Men get called a faggot by women because they didn't want to have sex right this very moment. Men are afraid of a partner getting violent because they know that both legally and socially if the police get involved they will have zero protection. Try to talk about it? "Oh sweetie that's because other men are holding you to toxic masculinity". I don't think I've ever been called a loser or a fag by other men for bucking the masculine norm. It's always, always the poor minorities who demand I play the strong silent type and endure whatever bullshit is thrown my way. Gender roles are a social construct, masculinity is bad, but when it's time to pay the bills it suddenly becomes apparent that the one set of gender roles these people will never surrender is the set that says men are disposable, men are supposed to do all the sacrificing, men are supposed to feel proud of being little cogs who prop up the actual special people.
I'm sure you know what it's like to endure some kind of abuse, most people do. But if you're a woman and you want to tell your story, guess what? CNN will believe you. USAToday will believe you. Huffingtonpost and Salon and Jezebel and every last video game website that thinks social justice is what it's supposed to be writing about instead of video games will believe you.
The twitterati, those bluechecks and thought leaders and others on the right side of history, well, their standards are higher of course. They'll believe you until it's not convenient. If you got assaulted you better hope your assailant's skin is a lighter color than yours. I don't really care what idiots say on twitter but it does bother me that twitter will endlessly allow it, while if I throw an asshole journalist's condescending dismissal back in their face by telling them to learn to code because they lost their high-paying blogging job and now can't go out drinking in their posh manhattan neighborhood 5 nights a week, suddenly it's "hate speech" and I need to be shut up.
Every day we are told that we're not good enough. Men are awful because we don't express our feelings. Men are pigs because we like looking at attractive women on tv and in movies. We are constantly being bombarded with the message that we are not good enough. We're colonizers. We steal jobs and college slots from minorities. Not enough women in STEM is a crime against humanity because college is so important, but if a man gets kicked out with fake assault charges he's a whiner because losing out on college suddenly isn't that important to a person's life. Calling a woman a slut is like taking the lord's name in vain, but if you disagree with a woman online the very first attack she will immediately go to is to call you a virgin, basement dweller, say you can't get laid and no woman wants you. The truth is defined by who is saying it, not what the actual truth is.
Brie Larson goes on a tear saying that white men need to shut up about Captain Marvel because it wasn't made for them, but if I say "okay I'm not going to see it then" without being angry or making a fuss, that's terrible because they don't want my voice, but they sure as shit feel entitled to my money. Gillette wants me to feel bad for teaching young boys to be violent, for catcalling women. The ad has nothing but white men doing bad and colored men correcting them. Even though 9 out of 10 women who don't have editorial control over articles and ads and shows will tell you that most of the catcalling comes from men of every skin color but white. But don't you dare point out that maybe nonwhite cultures could also do some work on improving themselves because then you're racist. So what message is that supposed to send? That if you're brown, you can't help treating women badly because only whites are smart enough to understand? That if you're a woman who is assaulted or abused, you'd better pray your attacker is white because otherwise the socjus focus groups will tar you as an enemy for harming the chosen narrative? Yet when we point out their hypocrisy, we get called racists.
Trump voters are tired of being called nazis. Millions of them voted for the same border control attitude that Obama ran on in 2008. Why don't Obama supporters get called nazis? These people disingenuously act like anyone who was a liberal but now is pissed at the democrats was always secretly a white supremacist just waiting for the right time to reveal themselves. Are you a white supremacist because you are not unflinchingly loyal to a party of rich assholes who profit off of terrifying immigrants and keeping them second class citizens? Are you a white supremacist because you don't believe in reparations for anyone who passes a paper bag test?
Are you a white supremacist because you believe in treating people like individuals and not judging them on their skin color? Because that's why I get called one so excuse me if I don't buy that "white supremacy" is a widespread problem.
Men get harsher prison sentences than women. Men kill themselves 3 times as often as women. Men are 4 times likelier to be homeless than women but unlike women, we don't get special shelters. A woman can leer and catcall and grope a man if she finds him attractive because her sexuality is beautiful and empowering, but men's sexuality is an ugly threat. "Don't use sex to shame us", says the people who use sex to shame us. Men don't get reproductive freedom like women. Women rape boys, beat their spouses, default on legal responsibilities and society wants to extend them endless understanding, but a man who acts like anything less than a self-flagellating combination of Ward Cleaver and Dudley Do-right must have the book thrown at them. If you're white and religious you're a genocidal maniac, if you're brown and religious you have a beautiful culture because once again, the white man's burden lives on unscathed, but don't call out the limlibs propagating it because the worst sin of all is pressuring them into actually doing the work of solving the problems they cause but blame us for.
But if we pipe up and complain about any of this? "Whoa simmer down there. We're just talking about actual white supremacists. If you think that applies to you that's your problem. Of course it's okay for you to just be you. What are you, fragile? Poor little fragile baby gonna cry?"
And then as soon as these people have tricked us into falling back on being strong and silent because that's what society wants all of us to be, everyone goes immediately back to shitting on us for being just that in every way. Once again I'm bad because I have a job, I get paid more than an equally qualified woman even though I don't, I oppress women because I ask them on dates sometimes, I'm selfish for showing feelings even though I'm a monster for not showing them.
If this kind of hypocritical motte-and-bailey antagonism was used on any group other than white males, any at all, it would be called "gaslighting" and we would be reminded that gaslighting is what nazis do, in between sharing frog memes and wearing red hats and other such abominable activities.
I know my life is in pretty good shape. The only problem I have with any of these faux-liberals is that I would like them to also admit their copious privilege. They don't want to and that makes them hypocrites, it makes them power-hungry opportunists, and it makes them pathetic. I would guess pretty much everyone here feels that way.