Fanfiction Horrors -

[THOTHunterAlice]

This fanfic hurts me in too many ways, in such a short window of time.



Leon can’t catch a fucking break here.

Something something him looking like a twink despite being straight and having a Canon love interest that's a chick something something that won't stop fujos from making him get pegged something something fujos are sick fucks. in all seriousness, Leon doesn't deserve this after all he's been through

 

[Tardar the Barbarian]

Of course.

 

[THOTHunterAlice]

Of course.
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I want to believe that no way in hell a 25 year old would do this, but given my experiences with fanfiction and that I've been heckled once by someone 8 years my senior over a fanfic I didn't want to do....I need some vodka.

 

[Homemade Car Milk]

Of course.
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So quirky and cool! Yeah right. I’m cringing so hard right now.

 

[BroccoliBrain]

I want to believe that no way in hell a 25 year old would do this, but given my experiences with fanfiction and that I've been heckled once by someone 8 years my senior over a fanfic I didn't want to do....I need some vodka.

Aw hell no, in your heart you know these nerdy bitches will call themselves 'fandom moms' because they're finally queen bee at something at age 30.

 

[Agent Abe Caprine]

jokey-jerry
archive
This guy claims to be from two English speaking countries despite writing like he's ESL. The profile is too sincere looking to be a troll. I'm going to assume Jerry here is a special boy.
Naoto's Leg

One day I am naoto Shirogane. I am a person who is named naoto shirogane and i go to the Police station to go to work. At the work i am very smart person but no one like me because i am short and small.

My legs are small they are two legs one leg (one, ) is very hairy, the other leg ( two)) is not lightly only and is covered by the pants. I walk with the legs into the police station and say, "hello" to the man who is there, his name, this man, who is a gizzley old man with not a beard yet but almost a beard, his name is Dojima.

I was worried she had eight legs of varying length. Thanks for clarifying.
The Dojima Money

One day I was Yu Narukami and was being across the sea. I in the boat sailing to a place I knew... Inaba. Inaba. Inaba.
Inaba was a place I knew for very much a reason. Inbaa: a very important town place... but why?

Inaba was a place... with people in it. But the biggest person, was the detective... Rich single dectective who live in Inabab. This man very scary. He stink like smelly. And he lived in the inaba. And the thinking of Narukami, the man, who was single devtive who was very rich... his name on his big jacked into the jacked a very long name written with sewing utensils. His name on the jacket: DOJIJJMA

At the Ibana. Yu Narkumai gho to Dojima. He arrived to Dijioma. Dojima says, "Hello..." and I nod. I know dojima's game. He thinks he is mysterosus. But he won't wnat ot let me know I know his game he is not really a man of mystery oh NO he is simply Dojimma, man, a single detectvie, who is very rich.

I say to dojioma... "Heloo.." But i say it special. He knows how to think when people are talking; after all he truly is a professional special detective. He sees into my thinks and he undertsnad me: he knows what I mean,m and what mean is not "hello," but instead "Hello... father."

Dojima is not my father. But he is my dady. He nod at me he unstderdan, that for a rich single man dojima, to have a mystery child not a big surprise. Many rich persons in this world habve a mysteruois children. Babies can be become lost in the bank acoount and have to run away to live on their own or die in the bank. I am not this kind of baby but Dojima thinks I am.

Dojima is sugar daddy, unstderdan?

 

[Lapis Lazuli]

Crossposting from the Arin/Game Grumps thread. I found this person out in the wild:

An interesting specimen indeed. They were kind enough to drop their AO3 link in their bio, and I had to take a quick peak at it for myself.

Slightly out of order, but you can go find the rest of the "Noncontober" stuff on their AO3 page here.

 

[Im just here for the salt]

Crossposting from the Arin/Game Grumps thread. I found this person out in the wild:
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An interesting specimen indeed. They were kind enough to drop their AO3 link in their bio, and I had to take a quick peak at it for myself.
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Slightly out of order, but you can go find the rest of the "Noncontober" stuff on their AO3 page here.

I can't wait for them to see that they got onto kiwi farms

 

[Homemade Car Milk]

Crossposting from the Arin/Game Grumps thread. I found this person out in the wild:
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An interesting specimen indeed. They were kind enough to drop their AO3 link in their bio, and I had to take a quick peak at it for myself.
View attachment 2021557
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Slightly out of order, but you can go find the rest of the "Noncontober" stuff on their AO3 page here.

Goddamnit don’t remind me of Borderlands lemonfics. I’ve had to forget that Officer Claptrap was a thing.

 

[Thiletonomics]

This story doesn't fall under the fanfiction horror variety, but is instead of the very bizarre variety:

I never expected to see TLOU2 and wedgies together, in a fanfic out of all places. At least Abbyzilla isn't in the story, yet.

 

[Snusmumriken]

Crossposting from the Arin/Game Grumps thread. I found this person out in the wild:
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An interesting specimen indeed. They were kind enough to drop their AO3 link in their bio, and I had to take a quick peak at it for myself.
View attachment 2021557
View attachment 2021558
View attachment 2021559
Slightly out of order, but you can go find the rest of the "Noncontober" stuff on their AO3 page here.

Noncontober
I don’t want to be alive anymore.

 

[Im just here for the salt]

does anyone remember Drakoraider? the zoo necro pedo? well he used to write fanfiction
this is the only one on his AO3 left

 

[Homemade Car Milk]

does anyone remember Drakoraider? the zoo necro pedo? well he used to write fanfiction
this is the only one on his AO3 left
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If there was a vomiting reaction, I’d spam it to hell and back on this.

 

[THOTHunterAlice]

If there was a vomiting reaction, I’d spam it to hell and back on this.

Thats why we have Islamic contents

 

[Kari Kamiya]

I'd be crying, but the "come" tags are making me giggle at how much of a pussy the author is to not use "cum".

Okay now I'm crying...... with laughter.

EDIT: And now I'm screaming.

 

[Yukari Yakumo]

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I'd be crying, but the "come" tags are making me giggle at how much of a pussy the author is to not use "cum".

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Okay now I'm crying...... with laughter.

EDIT: And now I'm screaming.
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So when is Gamera gonna come in and bang Godzilla's wife?

 

[Kari Kamiya]

So when is Gamera gonna come in and bang Godzilla's wife?

Fuck you for making me go back and check because I had to pass a chapter called "Moms Teach Sex" (and quickly skimmed and it's gross) just to find out that Gamera shows up two chapters later who apparently saved Godzilla's kids from SpaceGodzilla. And Gigan and Battra are female whom both Godzilla and Mothra went to pound town on and the kids seem to be aware of it all anyway.

I hate everything. It says so much when the one tagged "futanari" on AO3 was an actual parody.

(And Gamera instead bangs the female MUTO btw.)

 

[Hoes Mad]

ladies and gentlemen, i present you with this:

 

[Yukari Yakumo]

ladies and gentlemen, i present you with this:
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[Archeosaur A. Dromaeosaur]

I don't know if it counts but I remember when I browsed AO3 for the shits and giggles and the weirdest thing I found was a fanfiction of Benito Mussolini having homosex with some Italian soccer players.
And ironically the writer was supposedly a german girl.

I stumbled across an account with a single fic on it once, it was 6,000 words of Bill and Hillary Clinton fucking. Dude had no profile description, but they had apparently joined AO3 during 2010, before anyone knew anything about the site, I found this guy because they were reading half life fanfiction.

Occasionally I remember that dude and it always makes me feel some sort of abstract ennui.