Fanfiction Horrors -

[Shokew]

As someone who actually likes this fucking show, I want to hurt those responsible for this fanfic right now for some reason... I wonder why that obviously is...
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11033587/1/Voring-At-Littlest-Pet-Shop

Then again, it is a troll fic, so I'm just getting worked up over nothing. I'll try to contribute something better fitting in the future.....

 

[Frank Rizzo]

Sadly, these two fics I'm going to talk about were long deleted from FF.Net, but I remember them clear as day when it comes to Fanfiction horror:

1) A Rescue Rangers fan fic which, basically, was several paragraphs of Chip and Dale making out with, then having sex with one another. They even allow Zip (the little fly that pals around with Monty Jack) to watch when he buzzes in.

2) An Animaniacs fic which pairs up Yakko and Ralph.....yeah......the less said about it, the better.....it's as gross as you're all probably imagining it to be....

 

[Abethedemon]

This guy is brilliant.

 

[A Random]

...is that MasakoX?

I think I beat his ass in an RP once.

 

[Abethedemon]

...is that MasakoX?

I think I beat his ass in an RP once.

Yup, that's him.

 

[Randall Fragg]

Just as practice, I tried to do a reading of this story
http://www.toplessrobot.com/2012/01/fan_fiction_friday_rugrats_in_not_so_little_any_mo.php
It's based on the Rugrats spin-off, "All Grown Up". It's so hard to do a good reading because it's all in horribly misspelled incomplete sentences! And it's just plain stupid. I would post the vid but it was only done as practice, and I still need to work on the "not looking really awkward on video" thing.

Reading the horribly misspelled words in a completely deadpan voice is the best part of a fanfic reading. If you're worried about looking awkward on camera you should just record the audio and pair it with pictures of the text. Or pictures of what they misspelled words as.

 

[c-no]

As far as bad fan-fic's go, there is the entire (known) works of A-Log. Works that pretty much would defile ones childhood with a six-inch from the fursona of a guy similar to Chris. The only one different is some sort of fan-fic that was an interview with various cartoon characters about 9/11. The only thing that makes it different is that not only is it some interview, there is no sex.

 

[BensonGumballz]

@c-no your icon reminded me of one of the first erotic fanfictions I ever read that was about Ed choking a literal chicken to get sexual pleasure.

Please don't be mad at me for not wanting to find it.

 

[sm0t]

http://www.fanfiction.net/s/1293805/1/Unpredictable_Fate

A very poorly-written Dead or Alive fanfiction that is long-winded and shoehorns the weirdest non-sequiturs and pop-culture references ever into a story while still trying to take itself seriously. Skip to Chapter 7 for real WTFery.

Spoiler: Or you can just read my favorite part here.

What do you want to do next, go to the Ifle Tower,"Helena asked. Kasumi thought for a moment and eagerly said,'Lets go to a club". And so they did. At the club Kasumi drank twelve shots and nine beers. She was dancing the night away and talking with everyone that was near her. Kasumi was shaking her stuff and swinging her arms around. She was so into it that she jumped up on stage and danced with Busta Ryhmes who was the guest celebrity that was performing.


Helena was break dancing with a group of people. Busta liked Kasumi so much he gave her the microphone and she began to rap as if she were doing it her whole life.

It's important to note that Kasumi is supposed to be pregnant at that point.

 

[c-no]

@c-no your icon reminded me of one of the first erotic fanfictions I ever read that was about Ed choking a literal chicken to get sexual pleasure.

Please don't be mad at me for not wanting to find it.

You may as well post a bit of it like sm0t did with a DOA fic if simply so one would wonder just what sort WTF is in that Ed Edd n Eddy fic. Still, considering that you don't want to find it, one can only guess it must of been that bad.

 

[BensonGumballz]

You may as well post a bit of it like sm0t did with a DOA fic if simply so one would wonder just what sort WTF is in that Ed Edd n Eddy fic. Still, considering that you don't want to find it, one can only guess it must of been that bad.

I found it and (thankfully?) remembered it wrong. He just jerks off to pictures of chickens. It still....bothers me....though.

 

[lurkermouse]

Ooh, I loved Fan Fiction Friday. Unfortunately, it was discontinued due to SJW outcry and double standards about how “punching down” is a no-no is but "punching up" is a-okay.

SJWs don’t have a sense of humour, and that makes me sad. Good thing they’re such easy targets!

 

[Meowthkip]

I feel, as somebody who hangs around various fandoms and has read a good deal of fanfic, that I would be remiss not to share anything from my pet fandom.

Behold, Immobile Stone, a completely baffling Team Fortress 2 alternate universe fanfic that takes place on some remote island that has skyscrapers and mansions, but is also controlled by a religious zealot who calls for the mass executions of "submissives," AKA yaoi mpreg ukes. Oddly, nobody ever thinks to leave this hell hole, for reasons the author doesn't care to address. The Medic, of all people, is written as a mute, helpless exceptional individual, found feral in the woods by Heavy. Medic's childlike behavior apparently gets Heavy's dick hard enough to get him butt pregnant. For reals, you guys.

There's a whole lot of other bonkers shit going on, and it's not finished yet. My friends and I have been doing dramatic readings over Skype as it updates.

Nobody tell the author to stop, this abomination must be completed.

 

[Saney]

Ooh, I loved Fan Fiction Friday. Unfortunately, it was discontinued due to SJW outcry and double standards about how “punching down” is a no-no is but "punching up" is a-okay.

SJWs don’t have a sense of humour, and that makes me sad. Good thing they’re such easy targets!

Anyone who writes about how his blatant self-insert wants to have an orgy with the Powerpuff girls and Lilo deserves to be shamed. The io9 crowded is a bunch of idiots. But then again, these are the same people who thought Karwn Traviss was a good author, so I shouldn't be surprised.

 

[Mechanism Eight]

Pretty much everything in the "Misc -> Cartoon X-Overs" section of fanfiction.net is a clusterfuck to behold, but it probably won't be nearly as cringeworthy as the shit you people are looking for.

As for something I found (and have known about for a long time) myself, there's https://www.fanfiction.net/s/4389126/1/rise-of-Arcturia, which is some kind of ungodly clusterfuck of Pokemon (Anthropomorphic ones? I can't tell due to how shit the writing is), Stargate Atlantis, an obvious self-insert, and generally being a nonsensical piece of shit.

 

[XH 502]

I came across this Ecco the Dolphin horror while I was searching for examples to show my friend that people will write fanfiction about anything.

They couldn't even give the damn thing a title. They failed that hard.

 

[Omegamage]

I found this http://starkitsprophecy.webstarts.com/the_story.html on TV Tropes. It somehow has worse spelling than My Immortal. I think it is based on Warrior Cats based on what I have heard on the series.

 

[Laevateinn]

Oooooooh I've been waiting for this.... I've been waiting for this topic for a long time let me tell you....

I've been on ff.net for a good two to three years now, and let me tell you I've seen quite a few badfics, both infamous and obscure. But there is nothing that quite compares to what I have up my sleeve for you all today...

Ladies and mentlegen, I present to you the Human Centipede fandom.

While I'm not really surprised that a fandom for this movie exists, I still can't help but let my jaw drop at how abysmal these fanfics are. From self-inserts/Dr Heiter pairings like in Love at First Bite, while others depict Heiter himself as just a man who needs a hug and some love. It's truly a sight to behold, and make sure you have tons of mind bleach with you if you want to see these awful stories for yourself!

Enjoy!

 

[Queen of Tarts]

^ Why does this exist...? Interestingly enough, a lot of these are pretty tame. Save for the disturbing pairing up of victim vs. psycho.

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8035685/1/Wrong

It's title is pretty fitting.

 

[GREEDY FIREMAN]

Under the spoiler is my all time favorite thing on the internet, it was based off the book Rough and Ready by Sandra Hill. I find it hilarious but I'm a bit desensitized so I put it as NSFW just in case.

Spoiler: NSFW

Her long hair, still wet from the shower, had been combed down her back in a wet swath. Hilda was sitting on the floor, her round, wet boobs still wet from the shower’s water. She dried off the water with a towel, which then became wet. Hilda gasped when she saw a reflection in her bedroom mirror: through the slightly open door, she caught a glimpse of the chiseled abs and square jaw of the mysterious stranger who shared her cabin. She stood and spun around, her breasts swinging heavily with the momentum. She grabbed the door and flung it open, revealing shirtless Torolf (which was seriously his name) quivering with desire in the hallway. Torolf was ashamed at being caught, but his shame made him even hotter – hotter for sex. He stepped into the room, and his bulging abs accidentally smushed into Hilda’s rich chest. As Hilda’s buttermilk bosoms squished up against his granite abs, Torolf almost had a dick aneurysm. “Hilda,” Torolf murmured thickly, his throbbing meat wand pressing against Hilda’s warm thighs. “There is a secret I need to not tell you: You are my forbidden desire.” Hilda had been waiting to hear these words. Her heart was lifted on golden wings and soared toward a radiant sun of perfect joy. She saw herself and Torolf happy together, bathed in the golden light of love. Her snooch got all warm, too. “Torolf,” Hilda moaned, her lush teats straining with desire. “I need you.” Torolf, coarse abs pulsing softly in the moonlight, stood silently. Hilda looked at him expectantly. “Oh, sorry,” she added. “Torolf, I need you – sexually.” At hearing those beautiful words, Torolf flexed his rough-hewn abs and Hilda found herself being guided to her soft bed by the sheer force of Torolf’s undulating midsection. She parted her thighs in anticipation, exposing the soft pink petals of her clunge. Torolf entered her like she was a lottery. His engorged pecker pushed inside her and she felt fulfilled with sexual fulfillment. Hilda clutched at the bedsheets with lust and ecstasy and her hands. Her spongy love mountains hurled to and fro with each pounding. Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it. Then Torolf moaned, arched his back, and suffered from dick Parkinson’s. He pumped in all of his hot pearlescent sperms as Hilda spasmed with so many orgasms! The two lay still for a moment as the stinky scent of lovemaking billowed around the room. Hilda got out of bed, still shimmering with orgasm. She glowed with contentment, like a cat who ate the cream of the crop. She walked across the room and picked up her towel, still wet with shower water. “Torolf,” she said softly, “there’s something I have to tell you…” But her bed was empty. Torolf was gone, escaped out the bedroom window. In the distance, Hilda heard the fading sound of galloping abs.

Hey, I think they ripped off a more famous author!

Her body was like a beautiful flower that was opening and somebody was pushing their dick inside it.