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Over a year ago a morbidly obese, chronically unemployed man captured the hearts and imaginations of equally morbidly obese, chronically unemployed reddit users with his tale of being down and out of luck but was ready to take charge and get his life back on track. Eric, (omitting the multiple businesses both his parents and inlaws gifted him and he proceeded to run into the ground with his ineptitude) explained he's been out of work for a while despite looking everywhere for a job. He gained so much weight since he'd been married that it was now physically impossible for he and his wife to have sex, so she left him. Eric, who touted himself as an author (he had published a book on amazon compiled of ramen noodle recipes he stole from online), was going to bike across America to lose weight, get healthy, win back the love of his estranged wife and then write a best selling book about the whole experience. The campaign went viral on reddit and wound up netting Eric over 15k in donations. He also caught the attention of professional cyclists and others in health and fitness industries who were seriously concerned this person was going to have a heart attack and die on the side of the road.
Eric began his journey with several lies, that he had quit smoking (he does to this day). That he had lost 60lbs in 3 weeks just prior to his dad driving him from their home in Indiana to dropping him off in MA to start his journey. There was no official weigh-in, and missing weigh-ins and faked weigh-ins become a theme of this drama. That he had spent months training and researching (Eric for months, despite being instructed, couldn't figure out how to shift the gears on his bike, or fix flat tires; a problem that chronically plagues him). That he went to a Dr. for a physical and was deemed physically fit for the endeavor.
When Eric (immediately) began running into problems, he was flooded excellent advice from experienced people he then promptly began blocking and calling haters. Bewildered, hurt and increasingly suspicious of Eric's motives and character, this growing group of blocked financial contributors formed a facebook group (Cognitive Dissonance on a Bike which has since been deleted by the owner in a random chimpout) that accumulated hundreds of members and eventually caused splinter groups that chronicled Eric and Angie's countless scams and lying.
Once his GFM account hit five digits, his loving wife decided to join him on the journey (who is honestly deserving of her own thread). By that time she was already seeing another man she was supposedly engaged to (oops forget to divorce Eric first). It was at this point many people following began realizing something was seriously wrong, Angie left Eric because she didn't want to be widowed a second time (her first husband, who she robbed a casino with, had passed away I think in a car accident but she also claims he had cancer), and his health was atrocious. To the surprise of everyone following the journey she waddled off the plane the size of a juvenile water buffalo, revealing herself to also be a morbidly obese, binge drinking smoker.
Here's a brief best of for Angie
-Robbed a casino with her first husband.
-Threw a fundraiser at the bar she and Eric ran (owned by her parents) for a family in their town who lost members of it in a terrible car accident. Kept all the money from the fundraiser.
-Faked having cancer, threw a fundraiser for herself and kept all the money, the cancer magically solved itself after.
-Claims to have PTSD after driving in a thunder storm
-Claims to have permanently cracked ribs
-Claims to be agoraphobic. After a panic attack induced by this phobia (aka dehydrated from binge drinking the night before) while biking, our duo ended up in the first of countless trips to the hospital. After being released they celebrated by drinking and singing karaoke at a popular local bar.
-Actually is diabetic
-Faked having spinal meningitis (lol claimed the hospital gave her seven spinal taps) to get Eric out of biking
That's not even all of it, but it's all I can remember for now.
What we do know is that Angie is a pill addict, and she seems to end up in the hospital every other week right around when withdrawals would kick in from getting enough of a fix to last several days. She has an unquenchable thirst for asspats. She has less skill than foreverkailyn in makeup but fancies herself as a MUA all the same. She reheats shit in the microwave which makes her a chef in her mind. She loses three pounds and thinks she's a god damn super model.
Eric had a very distinct pattern in his biking, he would bike five or so miles one day, bike maybe five but more than likely less the following day, then spend the rest of the week squatting in a motel and participating in food tourism in whatever town he was in. He'd squat for two weeks, sometimes months at a time in once place. He was supposed to be camping, but he did that maybe two or three times and spent all those other nights in an air conditioned hotel. Eric went to Mystic Pizza in CT, a famous shop and popular tourist attraction and claimed to only have steamed broccoli and lemon water. An evil troll called the shop asking if a filthy fat fuck in a yellow shirt had been in and what did he order? He had soda, chili cheese fries, pizza and I think something else. When caught in the lie Eric admitted he ordered those things but took one bite of his fries and pushed them aside because they just didn't taste good anymore.
He's outright bragged or has been caught in lies about eating deep fried hot dogs, entire poo poo platters, cheese and chocolate cakes, sloppy joes, white castle (lol which he claims he eats for protein in an article by the NYTimes which was a work of art
) - to the surprise of absolutely no one, this has lead Eric to gain and not lose weight on his journey to health and wellness.The legion of haters and trolls that stalked their every move eventually were able to catch the attention of Dr. Phil, who had A&E on and proceeded to demolish Eric on national television:
Link to full episode w/o DL
After the Dr. Phil episode Eric and Angie (who had eaten, drank, and smoked through the 15k already) scammed their parents into buying them a fucking camper with the obvious intention of just fucking driving across America, but they even failed at that. They're back in Indiana now, and have been for months. I thought the milk was going to dry up but they just keep producing, they chimp out over nothing and their pages are almost exclusively inhabited by trolls. They stream live videos everyday, make emotional tirades about haters and swear up and down that he will complete his journey even if it kills him.
6/8/15 GoFundMe started
6/10/15 Hitting the road i.e. his dad is driving him out to New England
6/12/15 Dad drops him off in Falmouth, Massachusetts
6/13/15 Martha’s Vineyard
6/17/15 West Tisbury, Massachusetts
6/19/15 Edgartown, Massachusetts
6/20/15 West Chop, Massachusetts
6/24/15 Falmouth, Massachusetts
6/30/15 in a hotel in Onset, Massachusetts
7/3/15 Wareham, Massachusetts
7/6/15 Marion, Massachusetts
7/6/15 Mattapoisett, Massachusetts
7/8/15 Fairhaven, Massachusetts
I'm at the motel tonight, my rims are so messed up, I'm trying to straighten them the best I can.
7/10/15 rims fixed, now in New Bedford, Massachusetts
7/10/15 front rim collapsed
7/13/15 wife (Angie) is out with him in North Dartmouth, Massachusetts
7/16/15 on 177 crossing into Rhode Island from Massachusetts
7/21/15 Tiverton, Rhode Island
7/22/15 waiting on a new bike from Newport Bicycle
7/25/15 Portsmouth, Rhode Island
7/28/15 Middletown, Rhode Island
8/1/15 Angie will be back out on Tuesday (4th). Newport, Rhode Island
8/5/15 wife missed her flight on Tuesday, came out on Wednesday, Eric has a cold
8/8/15 trailer broke
8/10/15 Charlestown, Rhode Island
8/12/15 Angie had heat stroke, passed out and needed medical help
8/14/15 Angie posts that she’s Agoraphobic, needs medication to leave the house and is scared for her life. Waiting on a support car and staying put based on doctors’ orders (two doctors, one in RI and one in Indiana). In Charlestown, Rhode Island
8/14/15 Eric and Angie go do karaoke
8/16/16 waiting on a support car but claiming to be biking daily while in Charlestown, Rhode Island.
8/22/15 Stonington, Connecticut
8/23/15 waiting on his bike to be fixed
On 8/24/15 this was listed as the current plan
Ct, NY, nj, pa, oh, in, il, mo, ak, ok, Rte 66 rest of the way
In 73 days he's covered 115 miles, for a pace of 1.5 miles/day.
6/10/15 Hitting the road i.e. his dad is driving him out to New England
6/12/15 Dad drops him off in Falmouth, Massachusetts
6/13/15 Martha’s Vineyard
6/17/15 West Tisbury, Massachusetts
6/19/15 Edgartown, Massachusetts
6/20/15 West Chop, Massachusetts
6/24/15 Falmouth, Massachusetts
6/30/15 in a hotel in Onset, Massachusetts
7/3/15 Wareham, Massachusetts
7/6/15 Marion, Massachusetts
7/6/15 Mattapoisett, Massachusetts
7/8/15 Fairhaven, Massachusetts
I'm at the motel tonight, my rims are so messed up, I'm trying to straighten them the best I can.
7/10/15 rims fixed, now in New Bedford, Massachusetts
7/10/15 front rim collapsed
7/13/15 wife (Angie) is out with him in North Dartmouth, Massachusetts
7/16/15 on 177 crossing into Rhode Island from Massachusetts
7/21/15 Tiverton, Rhode Island
7/22/15 waiting on a new bike from Newport Bicycle
7/25/15 Portsmouth, Rhode Island
7/28/15 Middletown, Rhode Island
8/1/15 Angie will be back out on Tuesday (4th). Newport, Rhode Island
8/5/15 wife missed her flight on Tuesday, came out on Wednesday, Eric has a cold
8/8/15 trailer broke
8/10/15 Charlestown, Rhode Island
8/12/15 Angie had heat stroke, passed out and needed medical help
8/14/15 Angie posts that she’s Agoraphobic, needs medication to leave the house and is scared for her life. Waiting on a support car and staying put based on doctors’ orders (two doctors, one in RI and one in Indiana). In Charlestown, Rhode Island
8/14/15 Eric and Angie go do karaoke
8/16/16 waiting on a support car but claiming to be biking daily while in Charlestown, Rhode Island.
8/22/15 Stonington, Connecticut
8/23/15 waiting on his bike to be fixed
On 8/24/15 this was listed as the current plan
Ct, NY, nj, pa, oh, in, il, mo, ak, ok, Rte 66 rest of the way
In 73 days he's covered 115 miles, for a pace of 1.5 miles/day.
Eric's phone number: 765-481-8453
Address (ty @dannyfrickenp ) : 1567 WOODSIDE DR
Danville, IN 46122
This summary just scratched the surface with these two.
- New York Times artcle
- Link to an FB doc chronicling links of all their scams
- FGAA Facebook Page.
- Eric Hites' personal facebook page.
- Road to Renewal, Angie Hites' never ending vaguebooking drama page.
- Angie Hites' personal FB page.
- GoFundMe account
- GOMI thread that is over 1k pages.
Big thank you to @dannyfrickenp who helped me retrieve links and organize info.
Last edited by a moderator:
too.
