Money Financhu Crisis / Chris sells his stuff megathread -

What's your favourite Chris excuse for wanting money?


  • Total voters
    1,127

Muscle Bra

I passed high scholl bitch!
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
Composition? You mean, head and shoulders?

I know Chris is a fucking idiot, but even asking a 3 year old to specifically draw JUST a head and shoulders is not exactly a feat of compositive genius.
The art itself was crap but I liked the idea of a blank-faced person with a smaller blank-faced person in his head. (Not that Chris intentionally did that -- just that this is one instance where his inability to portray emotions actually worked in his favor.) A more competent artist could have turned the concept into a fractal pattern or some sort of recurring image and it would have probably been pretty cool.

If nothing else, this piece of art actually evokes a mood or an emotion in the viewer (well, other than "Ha ha ha! What the fuck is that?"), which puts it head and shoulders (see what I did there?) above most of the rest of Chris's oeuvre.
 

BigTubboWithLittleChina

Aqua Teenatic Jerkop
kiwifarms.net
Okay, a hole in the exhaust. Now that usually causes loss of acceleration. Didn't anyone notice?
Of course not. Barb's in no state to drive and Chris probably doesn't even notice, believing that the dream-like slowness of Son-Chu's ride is down to Magi-Chan levitating it like he's Harry fucking Potter or something.
 

Fields Of Rye

Your friendly neighborhood schizo
kiwifarms.net
It was only a month ago that the van was having mechanical issues.

View attachment 925721

It's not gonna last much longer at this rate.

I know that smell, they are overheating their fucking car.

You're air conditioner isn't like the one you put on a window. It's wired straight into your fucking radiator like a giant peltier device. Sure, sometimes there might be a wire lose, but the smell of coolent combined with a non working AC? A bet that's their radiator fan not kicking in, and the little air that is getting in is getting reheated and blasted back into the engine. Modern engines are beasts when it comes to not detonating, but once your coolent starts boiling you could very easily turn your engine into a crouton
 
M

MY 405

Guest
kiwifarms.net
This. 'My Mind Is A Blank' has always reminded me of a duff, but interesting, take on that giant copy of his own head that the artist scanner in Scanners retreats inside from the World.
The composition of that piece was actually quite nice. In the hands of a competent artist, the final product would have turned out well.
I'm with you guys, I always thought there was this strange homage to David Hockney going on in that drawing.

I get that Chris wont get a job, but how come Magi-Chan can't go get one while he's here? Just a wild thought, but maybe he could magic up some job and get the van repaired. Unless he starts bitching that he needs a work visa or something. Also, has he stayed past his three-month visitor visa?
 

BigTubboWithLittleChina

Aqua Teenatic Jerkop
kiwifarms.net
Why should Magi-Chan get a job? He doesn't need to. Cwcville provides him with all he needs for free - I always got the impression that his spying on homos was strictly pro bono work. And, here in 1218, surely his awesome psi-powers should allow him to transfer millions undetectably from Trump's very own account without anyone else ever knowing.

Edit: in fact, that's a point. Why doesn't Magi-Chan just control Pmurt's mind to do whatever Chris wishes? The Merge could be organised like that with the entire American military-industrial complex at his beck and call. Oh wait, Magi-Chan is so crap in Chris's needs-work brain that he can't even move a fidget cube without wobbling his hand as covertly as he can.
 
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Super Colon Blow

Sucks and blows at the same time!
kiwifarms.net
I know that smell, they are overheating their fucking car.

You're air conditioner isn't like the one you put on a window. It's wired straight into your fucking radiator like a giant peltier device. Sure, sometimes there might be a wire lose, but the smell of coolent combined with a non working AC? A bet that's their radiator fan not kicking in, and the little air that is getting in is getting reheated and blasted back into the engine. Modern engines are beasts when it comes to not detonating, but once your coolent starts boiling you could very easily turn your engine into a crouton
But this was a sulfur odor. That's the exhaust. Coolant is kind of sweet smelling. The hole in the exhaust leaks noxious fumes that have not been filtered through the catalytic converter, and then those fumes get pumped into the vehicle through the air system and stink.
 
  • Agree
Reactions: Cereal Killer

Gunslinger

Stay safe Kiwis 🥝
kiwifarms.net
But this was a sulfur odor. That's the exhaust. Coolant is kind of sweet smelling. The hole in the exhaust leaks noxious fumes that have not been filtered through the catalytic converter, and then those fumes get pumped into the vehicle through the air system and stink.
Yeah but can you really trust that Chris knows a sulfur smell from any other smell? He's exceptional and probably parroting something he heard one of his parents say once when they had a car problem.
 

Duff

kiwifarms.net
I don't believe that anything is actually wrong with the van and that Chris is just ebegging as usual, however I'm somewhat glad he's asking everyone to send donations to Sockness and not his PayPal account, at least that way if money is sent out then we know for sure Chris won't be blowing it all on toys, fast food and games etc.
 

Fields Of Rye

Your friendly neighborhood schizo
kiwifarms.net
But this was a sulfur odor. That's the exhaust. Coolant is kind of sweet smelling. The hole in the exhaust leaks noxious fumes that have not been filtered through the catalytic converter, and then those fumes get pumped into the vehicle through the air system and stink.
If I could smell it in person I'd probably believe you, but the AC and the pre existing hole in the exhaust makes me think the radiator fan is fucked too, and as soon as the coolant starts boiling over you got a burnt smell that didnt smell like glycol
 

Picklechu

kiwifarms.net
Charb being without a vehicle will honestly be pretty interesting, especially since both of their credit is in the shitter. They're either going to have to come up with a few thousand in cash or find someone stupid enough to give them a loan with nightmarish terms in order to buy a clunker, or Chris is going to have to hoof it everywhere or beg for rides (I hope LYLT et al are ready to be hit up).

Maybe Barb will make him carry her to Goodwill on his back. *yawn*